Best Gazette Poems


More Foolish Footles For Super Soupy Soupers -

Andrea D?...No brainer:
Dandy
Andie

Or in her younger, wilder days she may have been:
Randy
Andie?
(Just kidding! Just kid...Ouch!)

I have no choice but to categorize several poems by my mentor as:
Guzzi's
Doozies
(Now don't YOU start on me Deb!)

Ms. Macmillan's writing style is quite modern so here-to-forth she is:
Trendy
Cyndi
(You're not gonna' hit me too are you Cyndi?)

It is rumored that Mr. O is a care-free soul so some might name him:
Groovin'
Ruben

And be sure to keep up with current South African events in the:
Suzette
Gazette

A Christmas poem composed by Carol Brown could be a:
Carol
Carol

Writer's block PD? No sweat!...Just a temporary case of:
Souper
Stupor

Okay, that's enough...

Premium Member How Prunes Are Made

When taking a bath in the tub
The first thing you'll notice, if you stay in too long,
Is how your fingertips shrivel.
Then, as you rub and scrub,
You might see bits of skin coming off your legs and arms
And you begin to grow little.

Some children pay no attention
To the warning signs I mention;
They stay in the bathtub all afternoon,
Until they start to dissolve.
They get smaller and smaller and smaller
Until they're far too small to holler;
They get wrinklier and wrinklier and pretty soon
They've shrunk so much there's nothing left
Except a ball of wrinkled skin
Where once a healthy kid had been.

This wrinkled skin is dyed blue
And sold in the store as a prune.




"How Prunes are Made" was in Nomo the Zine, November 1991, and was reprinted in The Ratty's Gazette  8, 1995. It is a poem in the ongoing series "Lucifera's Questionable Daycare Poems and Stories."

Premium Member Footles for the Birds

Let the Fowls Go

Release
three geese

Fowl Abuse

I struck
my duck

Jokester Duck

Chuckling
Duckling

Crazy Bird Resort

The loon
Lagoon

Bird Mystery Novel

Who slew
Cuckoo?

The Welcomed Garden Bird

Again . . .
the wren!

Did you get enough to Drink?

Say when,
Gray wren

Most Revered Ones

Pharaoh’s
Sparrows

Bird Gazette Headline

Blind Larks
find parks

Bird Acquaintances

She knows
three crows


Premium Member Village Gazette

Nor ahead of 

Nor behind the times ~

  The bell-tower floats her chimes

A Somewhere Paris Cafe

A haze… 
Languorous oft in summer days 
Where sundrops drip 
From melting skies 
Onto city grind 
And parasols shade the cobbled grays

Across back alley lanes 
Trains and trolleys tip toe by 
As a fool in love forever waits 
Among a noon bistro Paris crowd 
For his girl, who is always fashionably late 
Outside a sidewalk somewhere café cityscape

Young beauties amidst a mid-day stroll 
Becomingly, become ever respectively 
The flowers that line the picket way 
Or some frilly prize ponies 
Beneath carousels about avenues of Torrid place

A testament to this… 
The carriage horses that turn their whiny heads 
And then, when I turn mine 
It’s to witness boots of cavalier instead 
That step to one side 
For moments languor has left 
As my own prize has made red carpets rise

Those flutter lashes like shotguns glint blasts 
And soon the white dove makes its notorious descent 
Where the gentlemen, unbeknownst to them, become like minded ruffians 
As they dive into madness for her precious handkerchief

“Oh” this women of mine, she has her perculiar ways 
Just like all the silly rest 
My damsel mademoiselle never enters into throes of distress 
Longer lace invites mischievous about a button down dress
And her kisses offer smiles and arduent waves 
With utter love contempt to them, but my hand is her biggest praise

I guess it’s the thrill of the game 
And she’s the tigress and I her willful prey 
Opening up the Gazette, coffee I incredulous sip and purposely hide my face 
As my sweet flora strolls my way
And lands into her lover's arms
In a somewhere summer Paris afternoon café

Thank You Bank

You keep money secure thank you bank
Financial institution you are high is rank.
Accepting deposits you create credits see,
Honey is collected too flower thanks bee.

Keeping people happy you share interest,
This may be compound this may simplest.
Bearing mortgages also you provide loan,
At due time you collect due is too known.

Of their current liabilities under torsion
Liquid assets are equal to only a portion.
Under policy of special gazette of nation,
Fractional reserve banking rules relation.

Liquidity in minimum capital you ensure,
Basel accords base you then us you assure.
Moving around you I observe the bankers,
In material life money matters say anchors.

Diamond you keep, silver you keep gold,
In safe locker all keep ornaments do hold.
Old you are new you are I hold inner core,
Values, virtues are my wealth feels chore. 

Management of selfless banking is shown.
Safe banking I do on line on myself own,
I am soul the original bank of power light,
Supervisor of my bank is God is very right.


A Sorrow Or a Regret

Had sorrow came back with a full army,
Crushing every piece of me in this broken heart?
I have now shaking hands,
Trembling in fear and praying
Praying for a soul which is standing
Standing on an edge of a deadly cliff.

This soul is afraid to choose a path,
Cause it had never decided its own destiny solely,
It is afraid. 
It had promised and didn’t succeed to fulfill,
The soul made a pledge between Me and Myself:
“I will never be afraid again,
Not until I will be recognized”

Heal me I am lonely,
And hear the words I want to say.
To God and to his mightily power:
“I am somebody with a lonely soul,
Hanging on a cliff thinking of a sore,
A hardship of a fading face leaning against a family
That is waiting for an ending
In the deadly cliff”
I feel and I don’t dare to tell my inner thoughts,
“A gazette in the mouth of a lion” 
The only description that fits me.

I long for an ear of understanding,
Cause I am tired from speaking to deaf people.
Who catch the shallow of the speech.
To a friend, a father, a mother, a brother or sister,
Why can’t you be there when I need?

My heart now is not just broken but it is full of regret.
I regret giving my trust to the ones who don’t deserve it,
And for letting myself being treated harshly.
And then I regret believing that this is what it should be when it shouldn’t be.
I left myself accumulating the hated of years
Until now.

Now I don’t know if I should be full of regret or full of sorrow.
It seems that I can’t even explain my own fear to myself.
I am left as usual alone .
On between an endless sea and a large desert.
And for sure now this mistreatment is an obligation 
Upon a soul on the deadly cliff.

Premium Member Natures Gazette

In natures gazette,
Colony of centipedes;
Shoe salesman wanted,

Not Another Again

Again the sun will rise and the moon will shine,
Again the night will shudder,again the night will whine.
Again the darkness will beseech, the sky will remorse for its stalemate,
Again her wail will lament in the hellish night, her body will be bruised and her soul will creamate.

Again the candles will burn in smoulder, again the cortège will walk,
Again the daily gazette will be flung with headlines and debates and talks,
Again the horde will scream for punishment and justice,
Again the social media will rise in protest, again the court will surfeit with another case.

Again another news will herald, another "she " will be torned apart,
Another imploring wail will groan in the sky, another predator will born with benignity full of wry. 
Again another delicate soul will wane, another trust will be transformed in bane.
Again her eyes will open to witness the succour given to her,
Again her eyes will close to re-experience the horror she had to bear.

Marching, rallies and "online" protest will continue to stay, the vermin will continue to lacerate its prey,
To stop the beastly crime everyone must "stand" together, without any class barrier.
Covering the body is not important, to uncover the veiled thinking is more significant.
Not clothes but coarse glare is more ablest, for an impeccable child cannot lure the beast, 
When the probity totters, even demon can be born in priest.
Woman are not for consumption, she is anyone's mother, daughter, sister or wife.
Do not pierce her soul and let her die, she can bless the world with a new life.
Let us not be the second one, but the first to secure,
Because once upon a time you may have heard "prevention is better than cure".

A Disregard For Precious Life

I light up another cigarette,
its smoke turns into puffs...
then they form small clouds':
a skeleton drawn in the gazette.

It's a disregard for this precious life,
consider myself worthless and grab a knife;
but surviving is the blessing I don't deserve,
because not having faith is a moralistic issue.

Absent is the mind absorbing its harmful content.
I whisper " They told me you only live once, then I might
as well disregard it and enjoy another peaceful moment. "
Even Paul was reminded all his life with this threat!

My teeth are getting yellow, not bright;
my breath stinks, folks avoid me.
I used Colgate, it doesn't help a bit,
a priest goes by and scolds me!

It's a disregard for precious life,
it's a misery not to have a wife;
not to kiss her and say good night,
I blame myself for this self-plight!

I spot a guy smoking and talking to himself,
should I forget that I once was that guy?
A sign says, " Help Me. " I stare at him and laugh,
" Buddy, quit smoking and don't turn up like me. "

Premium Member Breakfast With Pa

For nigh on thirty years since he and Ma had married,
Pa had a breakfast table routine that never, ever varied!
The menu was standard - bacon, fried eggs and gravy bread,
And no one dared bother him 'til the Daily Gazette he'd read!

The family bowed their heads as he offered a desultory grace,
Then he grasped the paper, thence, his clan seldom saw his face,
Except his eyes now and then glaring over the top of the paper,
If someone talked, sneezed or perpetrated some irksome caper!

From behind the paper came a cacophony of slurps and snorts,
And an occasional "dag nabbit" if an article put him out of sorts!
Ma was ready in an instant with more coffee - she knew the drill,
When Pa, never lowering the paper, rattled his cup for another fill!

Sundays were different - he hid behind the paper in his easy chair,
As Ma and the kids marched to church leaving him discomfitted there!
If the daily rag was not delivered or suffered some minor delay,
Pa's day was ruined - he didn't have very nice things to say!

The kids were excused, eyes glued to the paper he mumbled "goodbye".
They left scratching their heads wondering, "Who was that guy?"
Their conjecturing of who it might be was never quite complete,
Since they seldom saw the elusive face behind the printed sheet!

Robert L. Hinshaw, CMSgt, USAF, Retired
© All Rights Received

Premium Member A Subconscious Prayer

Lord I beseech Thee : Take me Home
I tire of the Sorrows in LIFE
Joy eludes me ; except in POEM
I Truly miss my Beloved  : WIFE

But I am here, and SHE is There
Lord I beseech Thee : Take me Home
In Heaven I’ll Live anywhere
Golden Castle ; or Oceans foam

I walk along my catacomb
Fearful of Evil, silhouette
Lord I beseech Thee : Take me Home
As Written in “Heaven’s Gazette”

Just once more, I see my “ LENORE “
Be Queen of Heaven’s Honeycomb
Ready to Live FOREVER More
Lord I beseech Thee : Take me Home

Premium Member The Muse, In My Quill

The Muse, In My Quill  

I hadn't realized my penning going on 
Before the ink ran dry of my Quill. 
If I had just started with my array, 
For these words that I had written. 

May have been on some other penned display.

I assure you, though, that you are the muse,  
For today in this world that has become confusing.
Was it a destined write to be, 
The story told of a sea of words still in my Quill, in me?

If these words hadn't come when they did,
Jotting down everything rolling through the Quill 
Of my pen so swiftly amid.

I can't give up too soon in my quest just yet,
For the display, that I had arrayed, 
Of these words that come to display, 
I write, that might take me today to the Gazette.

Reverse Orbitz

Mach my words, that time travel aye
foresee (rather than being 
     at a stand still, nee frozen 
     analogous to cry

oh ja hen nicks, or more particularly 
     going backwards) 
     this chap doth espy
great breakthroughs, 

     asper similar advances this guy
   i.e. myself witnesses quantum leaps I
learn (reading The University Of Penn Gazette) 
     the Burmese doctoral 
     engineering student Kai 
     Sir Von Wilhelm Harris 

     made profound advances within 
     advanced combined research 
     laboratory of rocket surgery 
     and brain science set my
mouth ajar 
     (with rivulets of drool spilling forth) 

constructing a simple 
     to assemble gizmo (avail able 
common household materials 
     rendered unto YouTube), and/or Cable 

Comcast, Fios, Infosys, et cetera 
     which accidental discovery 
     automatically codified feign 
     top secret "FAKE" news to enable 
  
boot (simply for formality sake) 
     code named Clark Gable
yet in reality (a faux veil of secrecy) 
     to con Vince sing lee 

     foster an inimitable
mystique, button truth 
     for general public to unzip noble 
     no red bull) knowable

handy escape to past or future 
     and essentially unlocked laudable
simple "household solution" 
     to become the latest craze
 
     (synonymous with an opiate - manageable
minus addiction, conviction, 
     and excruciation viz zit operable 
via needle marks of the masses 

     within a fortnight necessary 
     supplies sans quantifiable 
while Das Donald Trump 
     could enact legislation satisfiable

knowing majority being 
     totally tubularly oblivious unalterable
measures permanently infringing on inalienable 
     rights such as life, liberty 
     and the pursuit of winnable pacification.

Personal Productivity Measured Courtesy

Personal productivity measured courtesy...

Unspecified number of hours spent
yesterday March 6th, 2021
reading (cover to cover) Pennsylvania Gazette
March/April 2021 issue.

Proud papa highly regards eldest daughter,
University of Pennsylvania alum
as academic whip smart high achiever,
she did (after quite a stretch of time
after graduating) become
self supporting earning hand over fist money

as yours truly
(her biological father) feels glum,
cuz I would qualify
mine existence as humdrum
hence quite envious at well deserved income,

which exact dollar figure I will remain mum
yet if privy being financially,
what me worry would become obsolete
mine mental would find me comfortably numb
livingsocial in splendour
versus dwelling in slum

bring (think dirt poor -
according to youngest sister)
whereby financial shortcoming exacerbates
predilection toward anxiety
with distress squarely within tum.

Back during mine salad days
earlier within mein kampf
precious time squandered away
this doubting thomas
grabbing life by figurative horns,
his outlook toward future
did excel at procrastination,

a pointedly powerful stance did delay
ambivalence toward purposefulness
hit me courtesy metaphorical
ton of bricks, now at threescore earth orbits
around the sun absorb shock
while grizzled and gray

recognizing when sober
upon post drinking up lackadaisical indifference
feigning to care not a whit,
I allude to johnny come lately self actualization
analogous to confronting judgement-day
resigned to gather wilted, shriveled, matted

rosebuds while I may
experience e'en just fleeting aliveness,
thus yours truly doth pray
to dance (why I'll) while
these spindleshanks sashay
into Elysian Fields
exorcising atrophied muscles oy vey!

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