Best Floozie Poems

Soozie was angry with her boyfriend, Bob
Tried dismembering him but botched the job
Disgruntled with all men
She vowed to try again
When she found him in bed...

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At night Flossie often went cruising.
With men, she went way beyond schmoozing.
So freely she bed-hopped;
then one day her fun stopped.
How'd she get the clap? So...

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Pole dancer her name’s Suzie Spangle
Her massive boobs she likes to dangle
They look like ripe fruit
Guys think she’s so cute
Observing them from every angle!...

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I saw her comin', guitar a hummin,
An' a smile on her face lit up the night
I said,"My you're pretty, but this ain't the city -
You're...

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The Deacon’s Feet of Clay  

By Elton Camp

At the fundamentalist church, Larry is a deacon
As a truth-teller, he’s thought a shining beacon
“It is the...

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The thought of meeting the love of your life

Can cause you to lose your cool

Stumbling over words and fidgeting about

Just like a boy out of...

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Flo Floozie will always be seen
			on St. Pat's Day covered in green,
			except for her rear.
			The message is clear:
			Pinch gently here, guys. Don't be mean!


March 18,...

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My boss was a sneak and a cheat.
His wife was much nicer and sweet.
She caught him with Susie,
A flaunting it floozie
And threw him right out...

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ValentinesDay 
ValentinesDay 

 
 
A Massacre 
 
 
 
CharlaXFabels 
 
FortyEighth 
 Valentines Saint Massacre Day was in Chicago the man played them a...

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My middle aged spread is just spreading
So I thought I should join a new gym
Got to fit in my dress for a wedding
With some exercise...

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IT AIN'T NURSERY RHYMES
     (It's haiku by Shiraito)
Three little kittens
jumped over the candle stick
Mama goose is sick

peas porridge is hot
can't get...

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The trail was thick with bities and the billabong was high
me mates were all a yabbering 'bout the price of meat
The cavvy horses trotted right...

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Blue was feeling melancholy and was far from feeling jolly 
by the window of his quarters on that moonlight night in May. 
The old mate...

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On holiday whilst in South Zante
My uncle is caught ‘in flagrante’
Found in the jacuzzi
With fat floozie Susie
He’s no chance of coitus with aunty!
 
Aunt Bertha's...

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Luisa ran from where she’d stood
at the approach of the crowd,
they wanted no whores on their street,
and had told her so fairly loud.
Some threw metal...

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