Barney a bawling baby bat always got his way
He wanted to choose his own jack-o-lantern Tuesday
He threw a baby fit, screeching and waving his wings a certain way.
His mother said no, but his father was pretty easy to sway.
Daddy hid his pumpkin in the boot of their car that day.
Sneaked it into the house and into Barney’s room so gray.
Mommy found it and chastised Daddy for giving a baby fit its way.
Would she cut it into shreds or give it away? No one would say.
Barney did not win that day, and Daddy was given a lecture by May.
His wife who did not reward bad baby behavior, was irritated until Thursday.
Barney and his Daddy knew this mood and stayed out of her way.
Moral of this story, give no credence to a baby fit, when you live with May.
‘Twas high on Binnicky Barney
that I asked you to be mine.
The ear was on the barley
and the grape weighed down the vine.
The clouds were high,
and so was I,
on whimsy, wit and wine.
A name is just a nonsense-game,
and love an empty snare:
and shame and blame are all the same,
but you and I were there.
In summer’s throes,
the fungus knows
its spores are in the air.
“Bryn y Cabanau”, so it’s called,
as per the ancient tongue,
and I was galled, abashed, appalled,
embarrassingly wrong.
For lovers’ lisps
are will o’the wisps,
and never last for long.
There’s merit in mistake, they say,
and losing leads to learning,
and every dog must have its day,
and every worm’s for turning.
(For all we glean,
we wish we’d been
a little more discerning.)
Solution is a kind of death,
regret a form of doubt:
and love’s a type of crystal meth
from which delusions sprout.
The pieces fit,
but you’re the bit
I haven’t yet worked out.
big balloon-like bouncy Barney B. bear
Came out of the bushes from practically no where
His nose had led him straight to this buzzing bee hive
He hesitated a few minutes when he counted thirty-five
The bees are in a tizzy, he thought, who stirred them up?
Did he have his bee suit? No. It was being let out by Buttercup
Buttercup was Barney’s bubbly, bounteously beautiful wife.
Barney dove into the bees for honey, for he only had one life.
My pet is a pincher bug
Called earwig said cousin Doug
Takes little room, lies on my mug
I click photo, he looks quite smug
He can really dance and cut a rug
I love Barney Bee my pincher bug
Barnyard animals were intimidated by the bull.
He is from Chicago, he must be part of the mafia.
Whisper whisper gossip gossip
Barney was a quiet animal, he stayed to himself
He was not antisocial, just not socialized.
He wanted to have friends.
It had not happened.
He had no idea how to begin.
Whisper whisper gossip gossip the chickens and hens said.
There must be something wrong with him said the mean cows.
He was shy, and brilliant, but they never knew.
He was a fancy farm rooster always
prunin’ and preenin' his feathers for show
But man could that rooster wake up the dead
when he puffed his chest and let out a crow
He was the king of the barnyard for sure
struttin’ around just like he owned the place
Any time a critter would get too close
Barney would go after them in a chase
He'd peck at the legs of the big critters
poke the small ones right on top of the head
If' a young rooster try to challenge him
them long spurs of his just might leave them dead
All them hens would go scratchin’ and cacklin’
as they went sashaying about the farm
Each hen knew as did the animals too
with Barney there they won’t come to no harm
One morning my wife was gathering eggs
I heard a ruckus I couldn't believe
Barney was chasing my wife cross the yard
was the funniest thing I'd ever see'd
Old Barney was a mighty good rooster
none better for taking care of the coup
But I do have to tell you all something
Barney made a mighty fine chicken soup
Let that be a lesson to you cowboys
you might think that you're a running the land
But step out of line and you're gonna find
who's really holding the reigns in their hand
Meet the happy couple
That's Hilda all in white
Barney's there beside her
Loves her with all his might
They're an interracial couple
No problem nowadays
Frowned on not too long ago
But today it's a-okay
Met at the local horse saloon
Frequented by the equine crowd
She was a pretty show horse
He was boisterous and loud
Pretty soon, she tamed him
Settled him down just fine
Any filly would be proud to say
That stud over there is mine
Soon, a couple of months go by
Hilda's expecting a son
The happy couple race around
High hoof-ing everyone
Had a colt, called him Clyde
So proud of their little guy
Running through peaceful pastures
Then off to the clouds they fly
You can see this happy couple at night
When you view the evening sky
The three stars south of Orion
Are Barney, Hilda and Clyde
Barney Boy aka bull dog boss hog has confident attitude to spare
We see him flying around on his Harley doing things we don’t dare
He drives down the roads showing off his muscles and physique
The motorcycle groupies practically faint; he is that unique.
Sheriff Andy Taylor
Was also the jailer
Fighting for the law
Never had to draw
Deputy Barney Fife
Giving crime strife
One bullet to load
Knew his penal code
Clerihew 2 Poetry Contest
Sponsored by: Joseph May
September 29, 2021
The Andy Griffith Show
Fred Flintstone
Felt tingles, down his funny bone,
While playing his golf ball, he lost control.
Barney cried foul, as it bounced off his elbow into the hole.
Barney Rubble
Was in deep trouble,
When the match referee, ignored his demand.
And Fred laughed out loud, when Barney's ball plugged in the sand.
9 / 11 / 2021.
Fred Flintstone
In Bedrock he was known
His cat would always put him out
And for Wilma he would shout
Barney Rubble
Was always there on the double
To get Fred out of a jam
Then he would scram
Example For my Contest
8-28-2021
Once I sat there engaged and waiting
Although it seemed to be, that the rolls were rotating
I discovered the many expectations
Remembering many depressed, idle aspirations
Then I heard an alternate, lonely awaiting,
At this time pillows and tissues were accommodating.
Felt like surviving, but with a deficiency,
Your absence stung and left only a shadow of your proficiency.
It’s all great and all new,
There will be others, but none of them are you.
I know you were leaving, moving on,
From a distance I'm grieving, as though you are gone.
Gone from this world,
Well at least from mine.
Now I feel so broken,
like only half a design.
It is only you that can fix my mind,
But now you’re not, mine has resigned.
Resigned from trying and complying,
Drag my feet along in between my crying.
Meet the happy couple
That's Hilda all in white
Barney's there beside her
Loves her with all his might
They're an interracial couple
No problem nowadays
Frowned on not too long ago
But today it's a-okay
Met at the local horse saloon
Frequented by the equine crowd
She was a pretty show horse
He was boisterous and loud
Pretty soon, she tamed him
Settled him down just fine
Any filly would be proud to say
That stud over there is mine
Soon, a couple of months go by
Hilda's expecting a son
The happy couple race around
High hoof-ing everyone
Had a colt, called him Clyde
So proud of their little guy
Running through peaceful pastures
Then off to the clouds they fly
You can see this happy couple at night
When you view the evening sky
The three stars south of Orion
Are Barney, Hilda and Clyde
Arney Barney
You're so smelly
Like rotten pork jelly
Your laugh reminds me
Of a nursery
Full of crying children
Your voice makes me queasy
And yet you are stately
Yet still, no one wants to date you
Like rotten pork jelly
Yum! says the alligator
Fresh meat for my belly
6/30/20
WRITTEN WORDS BY James Edward Lee Sr. 2020©
I love you, you love me, we are a happy family.
You guys have blessed me greatly,
Your kind words mean so much to me.
I wish I can give guys a warm hug
Because y'all have given me so much love.
Y'all seem me through my ups and downs
From living in a big city to living in a small town.
You comforted me with the loss of my mother
I'm so glad you guys see me as a big brother
Hopefully, through my videos, you guys will find God and love each other.
I love you guys so much
Thank you guys for giving me so much trust.
I know life may be hard for some of you but I pray that you'll see your way through.
Sub Categories
Looking for the formal definition, structure, and history of this poetry form? Visit the Poetry Dictionary entry below. Then return to explore how PoetrySoup members bring the form to life through their own poems.