Funny Valentines Day Poems | Examples
These Funny Valentines Day poems are examples of Valentines Day poems about Funny. These are the best examples of Valentines Day Funny poems written by international poets.
You say all the right things
and strum all the right strings
but actions never follow suit.
If you insist on being cute
I’ll gladly help you spread your wings.
AP: 2nd place 2026
I look forward to each Valentine's Day
This is all that I have briefly to say
My guy being a miser
And not an enterpriser
It is the time I get some gifts that stay.
We, sweet lovers kiss in the sunrise view,
along that beach under the sky so blue;
Passionate love as ever,
Two souls sticking together,
while tides start stealing each pair of our shoe.
The Valentine in my high school was he,
So gorgeous friends were envious of me...
Hopeless guy on the dance floor,
Embarrassed me to the core,
What a terrible joke it was to see !
Mike proposed on his bended knee,
To marry him I can’t agree.
NO! My arm won’t be twisted,
As his ma had insisted,
Our honeymoon’s her him and me!
There once was a woman divine,
Who parked every car but in line.
She said, “Straight is a myth,”
With a confident sniff—
Yet somehow she still parked her heart next to mine.
its no wonder many say he's strong
relaxing with his love didn’t feel wrong
but there was once a time
when Moose was in his prime
Working Man felt just like his theme song
He wanted to wear socks to bed
"That's never an option," I said
Not appealing for sex
Nearly became my ex
Chance for romance would've been dead
My hubby dear does make me smile;
spends lots of time in that one aisle.
For his poet wife
makes love come to life
to find cards in rhythm-rhyme style!
My Valentine a giant with huge feet
He loves to cuddle up close to me
Yet I don’t adore
Sound of his snore
Like a motorcycle slowly dying
Lady out of roses of red,
this news hit him hard in the head.
Lilies of blue,
expensive hue,
more than expensive loaf of bread.
I strive for a nightly embrace
that snuggles us closely in place
but restless legs harm
my want and my arms
when jerking spouse flies me thru space.
There once was a fellow named Dwight;
tried to impress his Valentine that night.
With sweet chocolates and flowers,
Her tummy got sour.
He cried, "no not tonight".
My Funny Valentine Poetry Contest
1/29/2026
Sponsored by: Andrea Dietrich
Names have been changed to protect the innocent.
Donovan was not a handsome man
But Lulu was his most ardent fan
She followed him around
Til he was forced aground
And torpedoed by her love’s grand plan
I offered my barefoot sweetheart a rose,
And gave a kiss on the tip of her nose.
She told me, “That is sweet,
But I'd rather you treat,
Me to some shoes, for I haven't got those!”