So, in so many ways past and present mesh,
it's reminiscence of everything I have been through.
I thought, I thought I had bid adieu.
And then a poem from 2020.
A soft laughter fill with tears, a glance
A view from 2025
hello !! goodbye, hello ! again.
I feel like I've met my long lost friend ( a grin so bright it eclipsing sunlight)
Pen to paper ,eyes to a book.
I think I found what I've overlooked ( a smile so soft ,a heart that melts)
a passion so fierce
a thirst unquenched!
words unwritten.....
Jaws unclenched!
emotion pours , like a gush of rain rushing ,thrusting to the ocean floor.
I see the me of yesterday. ( Eyes glistening with unshed tears)
I see the growth ( a lie from deep within but a truth that's actually not so thin )
but still the pain I've held at Bay.
I say I'm strong.
I've moved on !
but this brings about a memory of a time
A time
of yesterday
a time I thought long gone and far away
a whisper of mine carried on the wind
I remember you.
I remember you.
I remember you.
I do.
Reciting, of the alphabet, not a waste.
I may get an A plus for trying.
I whistled for it, foraging
through its branches. Collaborating
with the Alpha and Omega, searching
for gold - that Atlantis-noun.
Lilac-gold or lavender gold…
“Forget about it,” railed the brain.
“…w, x, y, z,” I sighed.
Up…up…the driveway, uttering
with hysteria, viscera unclenched;
mysterious and victorious release.
“Speak up,” says the brain.
I release my whisper
into the wind, out the window,
“Wisteria…Wisteria…”
My eyes enjoy the vista,
the Spring feast.
before we begin to inquire
what both life and death represent
is fate fickle, does God exist
let us pause to ask, who we are
with an open mind, unclenched fist
lost in the maze of metaphors
bemused by sermons of pastors
all we seek is freedom from fear
with truth reflected in clear light
as bliss strobes all nodes within spear
the void of silence sets us free
invoking grace by pure intent
in staid stillness bereft of thought
we see within, light of our soul
untying the Gordian knot
God appears right before our eyes
simply put, He is love and light
our true being too, is as He
God is the source of our heartbeat
when ego drops, we clearly see
death is but soul discarding form
a garment we choose to throw away
in truth there’s no such thing as death
as we fulfil our dreams on earth
we are being breathed by God’s breath
Pause before action and after action pause,
reviewing first the play of cause and effect,
double checking whether it obeys love’s laws,
doing at all times, as conscience does direct
and if this be our practice, in time heart thaws,
erasing from our soul, vibrations suspect.
Thus with an open heart and an unclenched fist,
invoking grace, we’re by Divine Mother kissed.
having surrendered, we allowed
God’s bliss tempest to rise
as we are consumed by the flame
that that never was dies
ego disappears, soul remains
free from fetters of mind
we are he we set out to seek
blissful, loving and kind
all doings are done without us
because we don’t exist
the truth is known when we display
open heart, unclenched fist
nothing’s lost, inner light’s reclaimed
we now know who we are
we were asleep, now we’re awake
shining like the North Star
I walked beneath the ribcage of a giant whale;
Encapsulated in the briney entrails of an empty long-dead being.
Its grimace echoed in these halls of boned wall,
Of which calcite chambers temper;
Sturdy glass upon the shores.
Licked by lightning, hiding hints,
Raking sand with combs of sea,
Until I reached the portcullis,
I was too afraid to breathe.
From the bone, hung weeded curtains,
Sour, from the sea.
Dangled down, to repeat a sense,
Of giant mammal's teeth.
The viscera of foliage hung demure.
Violent, still, while biding time.
Swaying wet with salt, debris;
Beneath sat a heavy jaw.
Unclenched by neither cheek nor jowl,
Yet open for a crunch,
The mouth from which I stepped,
Devoured,
A sense of self I hadn't kept.
What once was oaken, knotted pine,
Engrained in skin of shrub and wood.
Was now the fleshy, un-divine,
Boy who ought and could.
open heart and unclenched fist
there being no to do list
each emote distilled by love
invokes God’s grace from above
When you try to solve your problems
with the swing of an angry fist
that cannot be unswung
nor the damage caused undone
regret will sidle up
hollow out your belly
and set your mind awhirl
conveying very clearly
that what you should have done
was take a breath or two
go back a bit in time
to when that fist
would not have swung
to when Boots
raised from just a puppy
relied on your protection
and came to you for comfort
unclench that angry fist
and remember how it felt
when Boots was in your lap
and you used that unclenched fist
to gently stroke his warmth
as he lazily stretched and yawned.
Icicles hung from the roof
like translucent fingers
Clawing towards the ground
While behind the eaves,
She brushed her plain brown hair
Tired gray eyes in the mirror,
Discolored around the fringe
And gravity pulled at the frown
Like it did everything else
She was one of many,
A soul, a body
With all the glitter rubbed away
Winter breathed out its discontent
A heaving sigh that scattered leaves
Over mailboxes, churches, graveyards
You can lose yourself in those fields out there
Mired in snow, as countless as crows
As tin men, as a brick in the wall
And when three young girls,
All smiles and apple cheeks and roses
Walked by her window, she cast those grey eyes down
From above— her jaw nutcracker clenched
New England January froze her eyes
A hand clenched and unclenched
at their sparkly laughter
The brush rattled to the floor
As the girls disappeared from her line of sight
She was already a thousand miles away
Up into the cirrus clouds,
Each inch colder than the last
Icicles hung from the roof
like translucent fingers
Clawing towards the ground
While behind the eaves,
She brushed her plain brown hair
Tired gray eyes in the mirror,
Discolored around the fringe
And gravity pulled at the frown
Like it did everything else
She was one of many,
A soul, a body
With all the glitter rubbed away
Winter breathed out its discontent
A heavying sigh that scattered leaves
Over mailboxes, churches, graveyards
You can lose yourself in those fields out there
Mired in snow, as countless as crows
As tin men, as a brick in the wall
And when three young girls,
All smiles and apple cheeks and roses
Walked by her window, she cast those grey eyes down
From above— her jaw nutcracker clenched
New England January froze her eyes
A hand clenched and unclenched
at their sparkly laughter
The brush rattled to the floor
As the girls disappeared from her line of sight
She was already a thousand miles away
Up into the cirrus clouds,
Each inch colder than the last
Magnetised palms and crown blissful,
conspire to make our heart feel full,
drenched in an ethereal mist,
propelled by a mystical pull.
Staid silence has no to do list,
so childlike heart does not resist
rapture within our heart new found,
that requires but an unclenched fist.
Awareness sans thought is not bound
to fears and desires that did hound
and so innocence invokes grace,
becoming light on holy ground.
an unclenched fist
unresisting
love’s gist is this
13-March-2023
an unclenched fist
we resist not
love’s gist is this
06-March-2023
Her lap was full of mischief, joy, mirth, love, hope, inspiration
She unclenched her gown, and they turned into stars
Floating into the ether, surrounding the planet
She was the dream spreader and she was good at her job.
We encounter resistance
challenging soul's blissful stance
and in doing so we learn
with tranquil eye to discern.
Ripples arise as ordained
but let's not by them be stained,
distanced from outcomes, love drenched,
warm embrace and fist unclenched.
16-October-2022
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