Short Roommate Poems

My roommate, Ippy,
     I welcome you to my life,
My cherished pet.

Note: I got a bunny recently. I wanted to write something about her....

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“One time I smoked pot behind a bush, and then I didn’t talk to anyone for 4 years.” 

-Shane G. 
Former roommate at my 6th drug and alcohol rehab...

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I posted a new story poem - too long for here - look under short stories

Maybe this link will work…
https://www.poetrysoup.com/short_stories/lunch_crush_9333...

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A single rose he gave to me
as sweet a gesture as could be.
	My roommate grinned with guile
	as she tried to hide her smile. 
Eleven roses, she held with glee!...

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The "poem length police have nabbed me again - so I had to put my new piece
"Sunny" 
in the story story section.

Here's the URL:
https://www.poetrysoup.com/short_stories/sunny_9449...

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Oh, how I love that Jamaican rum!
In my coffee, it is pure yum.
In cake it’s even better;
My roommate loves it too.
He swilled mine away,
Now it’s all gone;
No rum cake,
To dine
On....

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Rhino baby bubbles up the sink in a flash
He is showing his goods, and he makes an incredible splash!
This is a whine sloshed out by my roommate, Leroy Flash.
Who is a bit scared of the baby; his teeth all a’gnash!...

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Roommate mosquito
waits for me to hit the sack
turns to a vampire,
my hand strikes as a hammer,
it flies out, I break my neck.

______________

August : 30, 2021
Contest : A Buggy Tanka Contest
Sponsor : M.L. Kiser...

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I didn’t expect this
At all
In the movies
It always looked so 
Fun
But I'm bored
Classes suck
I have barely any friends
And no one
Notices me
My roommate is a 
Drag
There’s nothing to do in
This boring 
College town
My family
And friends
Are all back home
I wonder 
If they miss me....

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It is disconcerting to walk past your car
and see a man crouched down, hiding in the back seat.
Who is he?
What does he want?
Do I warn my husband before he hot tails it out for gas?
Or would he rather be surprised?
Perhaps it is an old college roommate.
I think
as I wave goodbye from the driveway....

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My new roommate Mary has a bad case of halitosis,
one day I told her and almost ended up with a fat lip,
unfortunately my roommate has breath and a temper like a bear,
truthfully her bad breath makes me want to leave the area,
having a birthday I gave her TheraBreath wishing I was the tooth fairy.










11-5-16...

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FRIGHTENING THINGS

i’m in the chapel
       it’s night    the room is empty
                              loud c minor chord!

old mansion
    boarded-up
         chimney smoking

ruined mansion
    boarded-up
        window lit near the top

piano recital
moonlight sonata
mouse!

my roommate 
    weird smile
        unusual eye teeth...

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there is a cotton feeling to it:
the same sheets
            the same bed
                        still looking for a song         
                        that doesn’t exist yet.
the door closes quietly, pushed not.
I think of a comfortable ending—
the ghosts under my skin agree.

a comfortable ending
a concerned mother
a cotton feeling...

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My roommate, so kind and true,
Understands my feelings, knows them through.

When I'm down, a hug she lends,
Eases chores, she's my helping friend.

Enjoying each other, we share a space,
Her hug's a home, a sweet embrace.

Calmly calming when anger's near,
She knows the trick crystal clear.

Miss her loads, as we part our way,
Best roommate ever, let me say.
...

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some people make good prisoners
I would not be one of them
most people never get caught
I would be in the unusual half percentile that does

Some people like a roommate
until they see their open toilet
a roommate would hate me
I am up and down all night and gassy

I try to tow the line
I do not break into houses
or hurt people or steal things
for these and hundreds of other reasons...

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Anna called her mother today
Out of the blue and the pink
To talk about something new
 
A quick story telling - like Madonna
About a passionate drunken kiss
With her roommate one night
On a streetcar not named desire
 
She described the kiss to her mother
In grand and lengthy romantic detail
What it felt like to kiss a woman
Knowing full well that the encounter
Meant nothing to her...

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The parents eagerly get on their computer daily
For their first baby is at a college an hour away
Her social posts keep them in the loop
a regular routine
morning hi
here is me fixing my hair
eating cereal for breakfast
say hi to my roommate
on my way to class
lunch break
me and my friends
supper is pizza
found a stray dog
her parents hold their breath until her first post
every single day...

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that was day when i was asleep 
this is the day me being awake 

that was the day of subconsciousness
this is  the day of supra-consciousness

this is the day, me hanging at the edge 
today i am ready to get out of the troublesome age 

i summon the angel, that i had, within my fleshy cage 
i am surprised to see it being devil's roommate    

i have been through a lot of changes 
then and now has been a new story to tell...

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Leong (one of my roommates) squirms up to me at breakfast, in the cafeteria.

“May I ask..,” she said, looking around like a secret agent getting ready to make a dead-drop, “what contraceptives do you use?”

I thought this an odd question from someone who just broke up with her long-time boyfriend but, hey, I’m an open book.

“Isolation and despair,” I replied, which got me an eye roll.

“You’re never serious!” She admonishes me....

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wind-whipped waves, white-capping near shore
  trail's thin layer of ice, cracking underfoot
    a cold sock awaiting impatient shoes

on the look-out, hoping, but not really expecting
  to spot her on the trail she once danced along
    her lithe motions a Nutcracker Suite to me

no, no, no -- not him -- my old roommate approaching
  inviting me to join him on his 'Jog with Nature' kick
    what could I do... I fell glumly in line......

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This is my very own version
of Three’s Company
He was tall and handsome
the best roommate
I ever had
never borrowed my clothes
jewelry or beauty cream 
He was gay and 
spent his time at the gym
home only randomly
to maintain his title of
king of café au lait
with expensive gizmo he mastered
I was less impressed though
the day when all smiles
with a twinkle in his eye
He made the moves on
my beau of the day



AP: Honorable Mention 2025...

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Another morning has arrived somehow.
Who has time for breakfast right now?
Inside the refrigerator I am looking.
I guess I’m too lazy to do any cooking.
I can have some cereal in a bowl,
but my roommate drank up all the milk.  That CENSORED!
Stopping in the nearby fast food place might be fine.
However, I don’t like waiting in a long line.
Here is something to eat both fast and light.
I’ll just eat some cold pizza slices from last night.
...

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When I bring home a deer...
to live in our living room, my roommate
won't hear of it. Fear of what? I will ask.
He has no horns. He eats only oats, but
not yours only; I bought him some food.

He's not even hairy. I'm not even sorry
I brought him home. He'll sleep with me
on the floor of the washroom. I'll wash
him down with a hose and a broom.

I suppose you think there's no room
for a deer without antlers (as dear
as he is). What do you want?  I should
bring home a goat?...

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You are so grown now.
11 years old and seem like 26.
No mom, just me, and you are happy,
Thank you, God, for the gift of patience.
Honor student, eminently popular and talented.
Long hair, beautiful eyes and just as clumsy as me.
So smart for one so young, innocence lost.
Still want to be tickled good night, baby girl.
Daughter, friend, roommate, partner, goofball
You fill so many roles in my life.
You have made parenting so easy for me
Thank you, daughter. No reason. Happy Tuesday....

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