Short Burped Poems

The frog croaked
The cricket chirped
The cricket croaked
The frog burped...

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The Frog croaked
The Cricket chirped
The Cricket croaked
The Frog burped...

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There’s bubbles in my fruit juice
That weren’t in there before
I ate an onion sandwich,
And burped into my straw....

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about the time
i had some wine.
you had some gin.
we burped chagrin,
and we toasted metered
glee of intoxication
by intrusive manners....

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Ethan Alan Eaton ate an earthworm,
So, Ethan Alan's sister Sybel said.
But little Ethan Alan doesn't talk, yet; 
So he just sucked his thumb and burped, instead....

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Grandma Gertie knocked back more than a few
When, of a sudden, she heard herself 'moo' --
   I can hold my liquor!
   She burped, and then snickered --
She 'neighed' ~ Off to the factory for glue...

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There was an old man from Sydney
                  Who liked his pie steak and kidney
                  He ate and he ate
                  Til nothing on plate
                  Then burped at his tall wife Mindy...

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Expected Rudolph since he holds some sway
for pulling Santa's exceptional sleigh
           However, Rudy's sore throat
           Necessitated Bill Goat
who dined on gifts, burped Happy Holiday!

November 19, 2022
A Fun Holiday Limerick contest
by Tania Kitchin...

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PARENTS
We grow up under the watchful eye 
Of these people called "parents." 
They like to walk around 
And act like they own the place
They changed our diapers
And burped us 
And fed us
And they loved us
Some maybe had better ways of showing it than others
But they all did love us in their own way....

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Chubby cheeks,
with red dumplings,
a chin having,
a deep adorable sink,
with wide blue eyes,
having a naughty twink,
his golden locks,
were soft,
and plenty,
his baby fragrance,
I used to inhale deep,
as in my lap,
he used to sleep,
its only when,
he stirred,
burped,
and crapped,
that his innocent helpless,
beauty,
in fact seeped....

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I once had a nanny named Sue
Always loved drinking Mountain Dew
Loudly she slurped,
And then she burped
After she had sipped on the brew.

I once had a nanny named Rosalee
She loved to rock me on her ample knee
Rosalee up and died
I cried and cried and cried
But I know she is in heaven with Thee.

Written October 10, 2021...

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You won't remember that you slept
All curled up on my chest;
Or how you smiled on seeing me,
Which made me feel the best.

The hours that I held you,
Fed you, burped you, changed your clothes
Will surely be forgotten
As they should be, I suppose.

Your babyhood will disappear
Before I've had my fill
And you'll remember none of it
But my sweet boy, I will....

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She drank all the water in the first five seas.
She burped and tooted and started to wheeze.
The pirate ships began to toss and turn.
Driftwood came in by the hundreds to burn.

She released it all on a quick exhale.
The boats and barges ran up a strong gale.
The beaches were flooded, sunbathers were mad.
She climbed to the top of a lighthouse and lived out her sad....

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Turtle
Poem
Lionel Derbyshire

Once upon a chef turtle
A slow cooker named Myrtle
Boiled a little turkey 
We waited in the middle
Of the curtain in a circle
When the turkey was purple
Shouted Myrtle in a crystal
Turtle ready for a nibble
We sat and bit a little
And were not certain
If we ate turkey or turtle
Then Lucy burped
And said
Gobble gobble 
She stired a slurp
The essential Lucy....

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~A Night at the Pub~



Benny burped British beer.
Betty, his beatiful beau, could not bear it!

Betty, burped a huge bubble back at Benny.
Beer burps, for the beloved's face are far more than bad,not worth a penny


Benny continued beside his beau, guzzling the luscious foam.
Better drive your beautiful Benz home, leaving burping, beaus alone!

                          
                         4/21/2021...

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Got my first bike at nine, its color was red, 
fell off nine times and bled from my legs, 
ma covered my scratches and cuts with nine bandages,
barely nine, I drove my dad's car and crashed,
nine kisses and hugs I gave to beautiful Lucy, 
got whipped more than nine times for playing hooky,  
nine stitches on my head for jumping a fence, 
I had nine glasses of cold milk for breakfast...
nine times I burped and made my classmates laugh!...

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If humans chirped, chirped, chirped
What would it sound like if they burped?

Would it sound like a chirp-up?
Or like they got their leg caught in a stirrup?

If humans chirped and ate and burped
Would it sound divine or like they lurched?

Would it sound as if they ate worms?
Or ate lobster and with the cook they came to terms?

Ahhh, lets just wonder what it would sound like
if humans chirped and if they would use a mic?

By Susan Mills...

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The president's guard took long
To drop his hand and I tasted his salute
And I tasted it in part
Do I care if they fire him?
But I nodded back

The president had turned to the secretary
Behind his back and bent for a second
But then guard there the hand remained 
The aide-de-camp’s salute
The investiture was mine 
Before he dropped it straight
But down too late
He waved at me

It felt powerful
I burped of the power
A presidential salute...

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Change

I had to change the diaper
On my little sis today,
Everyone else was busy
And the smell wouldn’t go away.

Her diaper sure was soggy.
Inside it was a mess!
I gagged then almost vomited.
I felt in such distress.

But when it all was over,
My sister smiled and me.
I picked her up to kiss her
And bounce her on my knee.

I hugged her in my arms.
Her cheeks were soft as silk.
She looked at me and smiled.
Then burped up all her milk!...

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I’m attracted to you
I’m keeping it together like a lady
And I’m just being myself
Maybe just maybe
You’re the one for me
Maybe not
Who cares right now
I don’t care
Not even trying to be sexy
Just being me
Opps just burped
Didn’t mean to do that
That probably turned him off
Oh well
Why am I so nervous
He’s just a guy
Not the first or the last
Oh well, I did it and he don’t like it he can kiss my ass
Oh well, Guess that’s my last time seeing him 
Maybe it wasn’t meant to be...

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Although Miss P. was nobility,
Very scarce was her gentility.
She farted and burped.
And soup simply slurped.
Loudly too with no humility.

Let’s marry her off, her mother said.
Her gas is enough to rouse the dead.
Who would take her though?
She can burp a buffalo
Her shirt always full of food when she fed.

They arranged a ball for sweet Miss P.
For those who knew her would not tea.
Her burps made them laugh.
Her farts like a calf.
Amused guests went home laughing with glee....

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