What if the crazy person was really right
But just stuck in a different dimension
Where the darkness overtakes the light
It would be maddening seeing souls ghosts
Would you even admit to it be so bold
As to shout it on the corner holding a sign
It takes courage to speak your truth
Especially when you have a screw loose
God certainly has a sense of humor
George was a prankster, at least one screw loose
Peed in a bottle, tagged it orange juice
His mom drank it all down
Then she started to frown
Her face turned red, then white ~ then chartreuse
Neuropathy in my hands.
A panoply is the rest.
A screw loose in my head.
With itis through my back.
It's what old sawbones said.
But he saved the best for last.
Seems I have two more days
Please pass the ham and mayonnaise
Hundred million K' away neighbour, Mars
Hovers bolognese smeared brother, ice brick
Fondness for possibles although bizarre
Intoxicate screw loose hair brained psychic
Frog skin glint silk soak, last page of atlas
Frigid rift in regolith terracotta
Ancient alien sustaining chalice
Embalms escargot creatures exotic
Savant submerged in claiming lake, limbs grey
Gnawed on by hordes of sword fish ravenous
Haunting waters, explorer credere
Stores files in his spongy tissue camera
Angora cotton ball goats, horns antennas
Munch dust, dull marbles watch earth untether
Still the twentieth of October
Extra terrestrial Thursday
Some people say Old Mother Goose
Never had her neck in a noose
She loved to play
Every day
No wonder she had a screw loose!
Prime Minister has a screw loose
Or does he want a Christmas goose?
A pandemic heaven
Is 24/7
And not one has declared a truce!
That jalopy is still puttin' along
Slow start on cold mornings
Loud stinky foul exhaust
And the finish is quite weathered
His seat is lumpy
He uses a lot of fuel
Not as fast anymore
And has a screw loose somewhere
But she tells her girlfriends
She still loves her husband
After forty two years
Even if he's not the man he used to be
The Old Jalopy Poetry Contest
7/9/19
She’s not right.
She has something wrong with her.
She has a screw loose.
She’s got problems.
What is wrong with him?
How do we fix that?
I am no doctor but….
Having several issues myself, I am
Hypersensitive to these kinds of
Statements.
Yet I hear them all the time.
Yesterday a substitute teacher called
Me, and I figured she was saying this
In front of the entire class, “I am calling
About Henrydexter. What is wrong with him?”
I was instantly ready to run down there
With my sword. When you have been the victim,
You recognize the bullies faster than others.
Written 11-30-2018 Contest: I of the Storm
Sponsor: Maureen McGreavy
You sat and looked at me as if,
I had lost my mind.
You told me I was crazy,
That I was unrefined.
The kind of life I offered
That you could not accept.
I think there’s just a few lines
That I may have overstepped.
You said I had a screw loose
That I was fruity as a bat.
You called me crazy as a loon
Delirious and erratic.
Deranged, demented, dingy daft.
Bonkers, crazed and cracked
Unbalanced, unglued, unhinged unzipped
Kooky, mad and whacked.
You said I was a lunatic
Psycho and berserk
Out of my freakin mind
A screwy, batty, jerk
You called me a screwball
A flaky no good fink
And I said babe tell me
What you really think.
The voltage seeped with a screw loose so she rocked gently in the old chair and lived
Why why why revile ya,
why why why revile ya,
the stinking rich want you for their *****,
at $4 dollars an hour,
and no more!
Aussie ships on the ocean are clueless,
the Aussies crew is gone, nothing new huh?
Replaced by twerps $4 an hour serfs,
the sour smell of the scab, is so screw loose,
Government cleaners got a pay cut,
$200 a week less in their kick,
Liberal bludgers persecuting but,
the greed could make you quite sick? Huh,
Police shootings now are so common,
with one million scabs on our shores,
one million now out of work,
desperation does kick down these doors,
cheap labour fifo scabs,
@ $4 an hour an no more,
McDonald kids soon to be out of work,
Child labour $8 the score?
Third world Australia is coming,
the poor exploited for sure,
the happy rich are a humming,
and the poor are the bloody paw paw.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DKzt4PPT5LQ&feature=youtu.be
We got really dumped on yesterday
Was hoping we would miss out on this one
But must remember, this is Canada!
The land of ice and snow and parkas and snow shoes
At least that's the general perception
We have electricity and runny water and even indoor toilets
And not only that, we have radio
However, the powers that be are promising TV before 2020
Okay okay, I'm exaggerating a wee bit
We just recently got indoor plumbing
Hmmm, strangely my tongue seems to be stuck firmly in my cheek
But we are a hearty bunch
On January 1st every year, some of our real hearty dudes
Take a dip in the Ottawa River
They're called the “Polar Bear Club”
I have a different name for them!!!!!
I call them the “Those That Have A Screw Loose Club”
They urgently need to seek psychiatric help
As backward as we are, we DO have medicare... yee haw!
So we can take all kinds of risks we wouldn't normally take
Like clomping down the middle of our major thoroughfares
Making sure we watch out for the occasional snowmobile
And wearing our stylish snowshoes and parkas
A hearty bunch we are!!!
© Jack Ellison 2014
A screw's screw was a screw
The screw had a screw loose
And turned the screw on a screw
GETTING TOO OLD
Her story told by old charts, scattered, water-drenched.
Portholes all broken, shaft and screw missing : a wreck ,
Grounded on concrete platform like an old man sitting on bench,
Battered funnel, broken hawsers, holes in deck.
Tell you stories about the old days when he mattered.
Eyeglasses cracked. Some say he has a screw loose :
Old man on a bench, like a ship in dry dock, rust splattered,
Battered hat, torn trousers, holes in shoes.
Endured war sagas at the siege of Malta,
Braved storms in the Bering Sea - ice cold,
Saw exotic island sunsets in Straits of Malacca,
With cargoes varied, they traveled the world.
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Written for Matt Caliri’s Contest “Write A Backwards Poem”
WRECKS
Battered funnel, broken hawsers, holes in deck,
Grounded on concrete platform like an old man sitting on bench,
Portholes all broken, shaft and screw missing : a wreck ,
Her story told by old charts, scattered, water-drenched.
Battered hat, torn trousers, holes in shoes,
Old man on a bench, like a ship in dry dock, rust splattered,
Eyeglasses cracked. Some say he has a screw loose :
Tell you stories about the old days when he mattered.
With cargoes varied, they traveled the world,
Saw exotic island sunsets in Straits of Malacca,
Braved storms in the Bering Sea - ice cold,
And endured war sagas at the siege of Malta.
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