Long Up for sale Poems
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Places We Lived – First and Last
By Franklin Price
02/08/2022
Back in nineteen sixty-nine, Barb became my lovely bride
We bought our first house, from a friend, a grand Magnolia, double wide
The three of us moved in it; Daughter Dani, Barb and me.
Just married and were happy. We would see what we would see
We lived in it, for just a year. Then we sold it for a song.
Sold it for what we bought it. We just had to move along.
Through the years we lived in many and we made each one our home
Even lived in Plainville, Georgia , a little town real close Rome.
Some places big, some places small, Some rented, some were owned.
We always loved each other, some of the places, just condoned
We lived three years in Texas, in four places would reside.
Two were bought with VA loans. My time in Service was applied.
We mostly lived in Florida. After all, that's where we met.
It was there, we lived in many; one or two, I could forget.
Our love had grown throughout the years. Barb was still my youthful bride
We desired to spend retired years with a mountain countryside.
We moved to North Carolina, in God's country we would be
Dani Dawn was grown and married. It was only Barb and me
Bought a couple fixer uppers, one to live in, one to rent
The decision that we made back then, from God was heaven sent
Spent eight years in the live in, fixing almost everything
Surprise!, surprise!, when we were finished, we still wore each other's ring.
Good renters hard to come by, we put both places up for sale.
Could no longer be a landlord, or I would end up in the jail.
The place we lived in, sold in eight days, so we moved our stuff to town
Neighbors close, and also shopping; our final place to settle down.
That was seven years ago. We quickly made this house our place.
Barb was the decorator, now she looks upon God's the face
He came down, to ease her pain. That was just three weeks ago.
He lifted her to heaven where I'll join her when I go.
Until then, I'm staying here, in the last place we would own
She'll always be here with me, so I'll never be alone
If you ever come to Spindale, be you family or friend
Our door is always open, on our love you may depend.
Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear.
By Stanley Russell Harris
The new mad author
Ho, ho, ho, the Christmas vandals have struck.
Where you might well ask?
Felixstowe,at the beach huts.
Three times now, those blinking vandals.
Have struck at my beach but there.
Is it not too much to ask them.
Too vandalise elsewhere?
I mean three times my hut’s been vandalised.
And it’s not cruel to anyone.
Mind you, I might be later on.
If I catch those vandalisers!
Doing what they do for fun.
I am slightly annoyed.
I am slightly perturbed.
I am also blinking mad.
You’ll have to take my word.
I will repair.my beach hut door.
It will look quite posh, you know.
Then, when I put up for sale.
Up the price will go.
Felixstowe may not be Southwold.
Where beach huts are worth their weight in gold!
But the amenities at Felixstowe are increased, so I have been told.
Children have a play area, it is very nice indeed.
There are posh toilets and a shower to wash off that sea weed.
Kiosk selling cakes and drinks coffee and tea I mean.
Another sells seaside novelties and lovely ice cream.
I think I’ll mention all this in my advert for my beach hut.
But I will leave out them vandals no publicity then I will give.
I only hope without the fame, they can really live.
I have the wood, screws and nails matching paint as well.
And if I see those vandals!
I could nail them down as well.
I’m booking all my expense; it could be quite a lot.
So when those vandals are caught they can pay for it, I certainly will not.
Of course there is no CCTV, and witnesses there are none.
Of those dear blinking vandals, having so much fun.
And as Christmas is coming and if they caught you know.
I’m sure the magistrate will be lenient and let them blighters go.
Personally I would lock them up and throw away the key.
Then my beach hut would be safe from the vandals, do you agree?
Mine was not the only hut they did vandalise so.
I’m sure they had a good time at the seaside you know.
Playing kick the door in, smash the windows too.
Trying to find something to steal, I hope it wasn’t you!
No, poets are nice people, they really are you know.
And on that note, I must finish as it is now time to go.
Form:
It's now a month later. An invitation is sent to me;
turning it down I reply, "Over my dead body!"
He tells me the roaches are gone because he called
the exterminator. I tell him, "Fine then I will see
you a little later.
I arrived to his house. He hands me a beer. "The
roaches, my friend, are gone. It's so good to have
you here!"
Drinking all that beer made me had to pee. I lifted
the toilet seat and there he was, "Sweet revenge
for me!"
I can't believe my eyes, it's that flying cockroach! I
thought they were gone, but now it doesn't appear so.
He then flew at me, so I swatted hm with my hand. He
dodged and I missed, oh darn I almost pissed my pants!
I gotta pee, but the heck with it, so I ran for my life.
Looks like this will be a very long and scary night.
Guess I'll go to bed, it's not safe to walk around.
Hopefully I'll get to sleep then in the morning I'll
skip town.
What I saw next man, this just wasn't right. A roach
with PJS in bed yelled out, "Turn off that damn light!"
I guess it wasn't quick enough because he suddenly flew
at me. I ducked and he missed...hmmm now where could
he be?
When I catch up to him he will be good as dead. Suddenly
he appeared crawling quickly up my leg.
I ran in another room but stopped, the reason why you see;
my friend was in front of a statue praying down on bended
knee.
"This house is cleansed of cockroaches, though the job was
hard." But as he prayed, a roach bit him right there in front
of the lord!
"Get the raid!" He screamed "My prayers seem unheard
somehow!" SO I ran to get the spray while screaming,
"Feet don't fail me now!"
I sprayed him while saying, "Life for you is over-with!"
He wasn't fazed, he stood there, "That's ant spray you
idiot!"
"You know you are sad and that's just too bad, because all
you've done now was simply made me mad."
I ran out if the house and my friend did to. Two cockroaches
shouted, "Don't come back or worse things we'll do to you!"
Putting his house up for sale cheap, someone will buy it
quicker then. The roaches have won this battle, sadly this
is how it ends.
Form:
It seems as if fate itself has crossed
my path once again
This time with the complete polar
opposite cards in tow
Offering me the same deal but this
time in reverse
When 1st he came he set in motion
the opportunity and circumstances
I was enabled to buy my grandad and
mother's family home
Now recently as this past week
circumstances have changed and
what began as an initial thought or
contemplation of selling has morphed
into an actual plausible reality
A house on our road someone bought in
order to fix up to sell on but decided instead
to give it to his son to move into
So out of curiosity I thought id ask him
if he was interested in buying mine and
the next morning he came a knocking
at my door
He came inside took 1 look around and
asked me what price I wanted for it
went away only for a little while later
to tell me
Yes he wanted to buy it all I had to do
was give him the go ahead and he would
get the ball rolling straight away
So from an inkling of a thought in less
than 3 days I have gone from thought
to having to make my mind up and
a life changing decision
And am I supposed to or should I take
all of these occurrences falling into place
somehow as a sign , serendipity or good luck
Destiny or fate either way it looks as if a
massive life change in my future is a foot
I like and much prefer change rather than
the every day norm as it offers little in
the form of excitement and something
to look forward to
I just hope I am not about to make a
monumental mistake that I will come
to regret
But hey as they say nothing ventured
nothing gained
And at least I won't have to spend any time
wondering what would have happened
if I hadn't tried it or given it a go
Bonus is I get to keep all of my most
precious treasured memories as
they aren't up for sale I get to keep for life
Whereas a house that doesn't feel like a home
anymore is merely bricks and mortar
The rich fare so poorly
in completely divesting of the gold chains
Losing it all ... casting away
the luster of the pearly platinum
family portraits on the baroque mansion,
spiral stairway wall
The copper savings ... deposit daub
straw crumbs,
that built the foundation of it all,
starts to totter and fall
When accumulations begin to fail,
put the diminished sprawl
money sign up for sale
Cashing out prematurely ...
losing it all
It's the fatal heart attack,
before the disappearing assets
hit zero
And the cancelled checks
start bouncing back
There are no bankrupt heroes
This penny dreadful thought
gives the wealthy
Freddy Krugerrand nightmares
Leaving the golden nest behind ...
to wing it pauperously alone,
is a wallet tear, safety net falling out
Parachute pursed lips don’t ever
reveal all —
Where the secret stash is mnemonic hid,
in case of an emergency landing
liquidity call ... phantom accounts off-the-grid
Covertly cashing out,
don’t leave much room for
mint condition doubt
Keeping a stuffed mattress attitude,
it’s poor manners to be
obnoxiously soup-line bourgeois rude
Maintain fiscal proletarian discipline;
looking fo’ mo’ easy-open vault,
capital idea opportunities
to reinvest the debt reset default
Staying on a silver cloud
at all cost
Means rushing headlong to a sky precipice,
bullishly fretting fearful
of a bearer bond, bear market free-fall
Piggy bank 401k squeals
be just another Poor & Standard
snout pocket poke to the profit-strapped chin
No-frills credit rating T-note bills
are being dividend, early retirement cashed in
It’s all down-low, bankroll covert action ...
‘cause everybody know
that being milk poppy poor is a withdrawal sin
I am the eponymous A. Floating-Voter!
I do know my mind, but I’ll follow the pack …
My vote’s up for sale now, to the highest bidder.
Yes! What was that offer, sir? You at the back?
One fellow offered me ‘less unemployment’;
Another one’s promised a crackdown on Crack.
A third says my kids should get more education!
Now who’s gonna offer me tuppence off tax?
One bloke is standing who’ll never be sitting!
So if he’s elected, he won’t see it through.
He said I could choose ‘Not to be European’.
I thought I did that back in ’72 …
‘A’ says I’ll have more disposable income;
‘B’ says he’ll build us more roads and such-like.
If I vote for ‘B’, I’ll have more roads to drive on;
If I don’t vote for ’A’, then I can’t run a bike!
All of them claim to be fighting corruption;
Opening closets; exposing the sin …
Though naturally, MPs are above suspicion!
Now, what was this ‘Members’ Expenses’ thing?
I’m already beginning to feel some confusion.
Which of the parties is really the best?
They all claim the others are nothing but liars …
But none of them passes the ‘truthfulness’ test …
I really do not have a clue who to vote for!
I’m starting to wonder if I should abstain …
But ‘Say what you want!’ was my Mum’s favourite motto,
‘And if you don’t get it, then you can complain!’
So, come voting day, I’ll be down at that station.
I’m going to vote, and I’m keeping close tabs …
So go for it, candidates! Try to attract me!
‘Cause, ‘tween now and then, chaps,
My vote’s up for grabs!
..........................................................................
This is how we tackle elections in Great Britain - not so slick, but lots of fun!
Entered in Dana'lynn Smith's "Politically Educated" contest by Frances King
We drove by her run-down house
with faded green shingles
and boarded-up windows,
a sad feeling overwhelmed us;
many times we helped her
to cut down the thick grass
and in return she gave us
three yellow flowers
as a token of her gratitude...
no one else could have cared more!
"These flowers are for you,darlings,because
you helped me plant them in the soil,
and they've grown to be tall and beautiful
in a garden so tidy and nice!"
she exclaimed in jubilation;
"Remember me by when
I'll reach my home...to dwell
in the presence of the Lord,
and I'll be looking down on you and
pray with all angels to keep you safe and well!'
she gladly said with resignation,
foreseeing what she couldn't explain...
She told us about her sweetheart,
whom she loved indefinetly:
from the moment they met,
to the day he peacefully died:
a lovely and faithful wife
was all he wanted and dreamed;
and their marriage lasted
longer than they expected to be...
to be taken with them,
not being afraid of death!
"This is the grand piano I sed to play
for my husband on his last birthday;
he laid his arms on my shoulders
and sang along with me for hours:
on those snowy nights without moon...
when romance was rekindled with kisses
and the sentimental tunes
took away our winter's blues!"
she murmured with deep regret,
until her light eyes became wet...
The decaying house was put up for sale,
and only these kids have a story to tell
about the nicest person on that block,
who once was the prettiest girl-scout...
who loved us as much as her own children;
but did she deserve to be forgotten and die alone?
And if you wonder what her name was,
she was the kind-hearted Mrs Adams!
There was a giant sale last Saturday.
An unbelievable one!
Such civilization: how far we’ve come,
Many came to partake from all walks of life.
What a deal; what a steal.
That store it seems, in real estate, is up for sale,
so to keep it’s customers satisfied,
they cheapened their goods to the public’s avail.
It’s dark in that store;
It’s always dark in there,
But on the sidewalk there is light,
a totally opposite fare.
Yes last Saturday there was such a sale,
The like has never been seen
O’er hill , department store or dale.
Such a deal; what a steal!
But it’s dark in those sale lairs,
It’s always dark in those stores,
While selling their wares,
But people still came by the scores.
There were prices one couldn’t refuse,
The customer just couldn’t lose!
A fantastic sale for which one would kill,
At this local abortion mill….
But outside of the mill front on the sidewalk…
there is the peace of Christ and prayer talk,
His light shining and on the rise
A light that darkness can’t recognize.
So perhaps it’s time to listen to your heart,
Forget the worn out buzz lines and what your “friends” say,
Face the light, squint your eyes and make a new start,
Join with light and life in a brand new day.
This poem was inspired by an actual “sale price” they had
at the baby killing abortion mill in our town recently . Sad but true.
Let those of us who care, pray for a change of heart for all
those who think in the darkness of excuses that somehow
It is a Godly thing and a woman’s right to kill His babies.
…sale or no sale.
Then and only then will this country take a change for the better.
“Seek ye the kingdom of God and all else will be added unto you.”
Robert A. Dufresne.
Greetings. We received your toxic tax documents today; proceeded to immerse them in the de-cootie wash for precisely 30 minutes; then showered them with Gamma Ray’s, which is not what you think it is, but rather a high powered barbecue sauce (made by some Texan’s grandma) that’s strong enough to knock those little booger viruses out clean cold. The only problem is, by the time we detoxified your tax documents, no print was left and the paper had the consistency of TP. So, you guessed it, seein’ as how TP is more or less the top selling commodity worldwide as such, I put it up for sale on eBay and made enough money where I can retire and never do taxes again. So, I want to thank you for supplying the seed that germinated my newfound wealth, and I’m happy to inform you that you’ll be receiving an autographed copy of my soon to be published book, which I thoughtfully titled “CORNFED-19 Pandamick—Making Lemonade From Lemons” by T. P. Roller (which happens to be my sudo-numb). Have a nice evening!
opportunity
most zany woodpecker knocks—
heh-heh-heh-hehhhh-heh
5/2/2020
This is a zany, flight of fancy, inspired by my secular profession after 4 weeks of lockdown! The resulting haiku is inspired by Woody Woodpecker—created by Walter Lantz and Ben Hardaway—a cartoon that appeared in theatrical short films produced by the Walter Lantz Studio and distributed by Universal Studios. Woody Woodpecker first appeared in the short film "Knock, Knock" (November 25, 1940). Woody Woodpecker's unforegettable signature laugh begins with "heh-heh-heh-hehhhh-heh," which works well with my haiku since it has 5 syllables! (Woody Woodpecker | Wikipedia) TMI? Oh, my!
A Chance Encounter
A chance encounter the other day
Got me chatting to a stranger
Just for some time to pass away.
He was very well groomed, very smart.
Spoke well too, seemed a decent sort.
I told him a little tale
I had learned whilst at work.
Outside a building that’s up for sale
Close to the centre of the town
A queue of people gathered.
Old clothes, hand me downs.
Inside people of good heart and souls
Were behind tables long.
And a kind of soup was poured into bowls.
A slice of bread was added to each one poured.
As the hungry-eyed came through the door.
As each one passed a thank you was heard.
Grateful for the meal today.
A simple reply least we can do.
All was silent no complaints from the poor.
Till a young voice said, ‘Please Mummy I want more.’
I sat back in my chair waiting for a reply.
The guy opposite gave a big sigh.
He said, ‘Things were tough in those days
Very hard for the poor in the Victorian Age.
They were ignored, did not count,
How could others treat them like that?’
No-one should be without the means I say,
To feed and clothe their children today.
I looked at him and shook my head.
My dear friend you misunderstand
The tale was not yesteryear or a foreign land.
I visited a local food bank the day before last.
And like you I was taken aback.
Unless with my eyes I had seen,
The myth about scroungers I would still believe.
Some get the dregs, others get the cream.
This is Great Britain in 2013.
But the people of our Nation are strong
In times of strife they speak as one.
‘We are mighty as Caesar, mighty as Rome.’
‘ NI CARBORUNDUM BASTARDORUM’