Long Suicidal ideation Poems

TO:  Department of Motor Vehicles Commissioner, Chief States Attorney

FROM: Dillen Dye’s Employer

8/16/16

RE: Some apparent non-compliance with the Americans With Disabilities Act; common courtesy, civil respect; freely accessible pursuit of health, happiness, and prosperity

I don’t...

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Paradise
like Rome
is not built
and not rebuilt
and rebuilt
and redeveloped
and healed
and redeemed
in one 24-hour
cycle
and recycle
and revolving
round day v night,

And/or 
appreciatively regarding both day
and dualdark
rich and fertile 
souled and soiled
recycling night.

So too
my personal
and political
and economic
and ecological
and theologically reformed...

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Attitude with latitude

originally written January 19th, 2019
and tension defines the dynamic

Valiant prince sip pulled effort
rebuffed, snubbed, thumbed
courtesy eldest daughter
uncontested vainglorious woke
mine genuine apology,
viz sincerely yours truly
psyche asper paternal overture
toward aforementioned offspring
smitten with opprobrium
figuratively smacked upside...

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Doing absolute zero endeavors

Earlier today March 28th, 2025
(thee hour now fifteen minutes
after eight o'clock at night, cuz
yours truly & wife paced back
and forth from one room to the
other wearing out rugged groovy
Tuesday (three day) experienced...

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Gloriously luxuriating in eternal sleep...

versus being alive 
predicated victory videre licet lunatic
if Trump trumped Kamala Harris
and stole 2024 presidential election,  
(whereat Musk bribed 
significant number of voters
handing out wads of cash)
courtesy underhanded modus operandi
and...

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Shame and guilt sabotaged mine healthy growth...

and let yours truly not forget emasculation
that prickly emotional immobilization
whereby these lovely bones 
subject courtesy senescence 
upon cremation reduced to obliteration.

Inching closer to mortality
linkedin with concomitant
subtle deterioration of body...

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Watching upcoming toilet bowl lvii highlight of February 12th, 2023

Above title attests 
how mine mundane mein kampf
insync as a veritable clogged drain oh:
flush with adventure overflowing excrement
er... rather excitement.

Apt aforementioned accurate personal description
believe me not,...

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Gloriously luxuriating in eternal sleep

Forlorn; bereft of golden
(slippered) opportunities I weep;
Three score and four years
replete with mailer daemons,
hence mindset adrip
with self denouncing expletive filled bleep
unwritten expressed recriminations
wielded upon figurative head of wimpy blip;
decades elapsed at...

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The very abridged version recounting untold tragicomic storied life of Matthew Scott Harris

I led a boring life.
The end.

All joking aside, now the epilogue.

As a bookish fellow born January 13th,1959
he attended school and got promoted
as a...

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Watching upcoming toilet bowl lvi highlight of February 13th, 2022

Above title attests how mine mundane mein kampf
insync as a veritable clogged drain oh:
flush with adventure overflowing excrement
er... rather excitement.

Apt aforementioned accurate personal description
believe me not,...

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Eagerly awaiting until many tomorrows...

to become affianced to the grim reaper,
who never promised me a rose garden
nor crystal clear pool of fragrant delight
to accompany last living breath
before succumbing into the Soundgarden 
of a black hole...

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I made several grave mistakes on purpose
Accidentally called you by another name
I am a tragedy in reverse in every verse
Shame on me for doing the self-blame game

I had a dream of a stream of tears,
Running...

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Pariah heap - savagely subjecting myself to humiliation

Outward slovenly appearance bespeaks volumes
wordsworth their weight in gold
(exhumed from the pith
of these lovely bones -
beclothed with mottled skin)
presages afterlife of hellish horror
(think Dante's inferno),
nevertheless a respite from...

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I live in a world of brutal ice and cold

Despite the temperature being five below...
these fingered handy limbs
awash with profuse sweat
dripping palms analogous
to a bloody busted gushing water main.

Mein kampf analogous
to a self made prisoner
who...

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The bane of a cold sore inside my mouth

Sent my smooching life south,
whereby I felt like poor Georgie Porgie,
pudding and pie,
who kissed the girls and made them cry.

The medical term for cold sores,
Herpes Labialis, refers
to...

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Watching toilet bowl lv highlight of snowy February 7th, 2021

Above title attests how mine mundane mein kampf
flush with adventure overflowing excitement.

Apt aforementioned accurate personal description
culmination of decades worth hesitation and trepidation.

Ever since garden variety generic...

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Chicanery grabbed lustfully repeatedly - yup!

While merrily bobbing along
the boulevard of broken dreams,
which in truth measured
no more than a furlong
think envisioning myself top banana
analogous to bull headed Donkey Kong,
I felt on top of my game,
which...

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The broken piggy bank
strewn into a bajillion little pieces

Unexpected largesse
yours truly patiently waits,
a metaphor of my dire financial straits
courtesy papa's unsuspecting muse
the missus, this wordsmith notates
unwittingly linkedin to his misfortune,
a situation he hates,
especially, an unavoidable...

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Suicidal Ideation March 30th, 2022 linkedin...
to mein kampf insync with mine body dysmorphia

After reading articles
published within April 4/11 2022
of The Nation
I challenged the efficacy
taking prescription medication
categorized as SSRIs 
and/or SNRIs.

Unpleasant side effects
such as earth shaking...

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Internalized emotions wrought
quotidian psychological oppression
retrospective reflection courtesy
20/20 hindsight reveals absolute zero
positive development of body, mind, and spirit
extreme agitation compromised

maturation, education, and socialization
every year since being
born free and clear of obvious defects
minus alien aberration, Russian collusion...,
nor...

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spinning on high speed mostly out of control
the washing machine failed to conclude any
of its operation according to a wished for manual

given at birth he had not much choice in the matter
due to the lottery...

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Seventeen thousand special K 
vanished into thin air
in one fell swoop life savings
fraudulent fiend did clear
yours truly duped
courtesy scammer with consummate flair
rowdies in peanut gallery doth jeer
raucous insult to injury outware
any remaining shred,
where peace of...

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(okay, yukon axe me whatsapp pinning, 
     though beep pre spired, cuz mess sigh key
     threads experience didst rub burr raw 
     as...

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No Matter Papa Repents...

Every blasted acrimonious misdeed
aye indelibly perpetrated
affecting ye and the Punim for life
hounds me doggone soul night and day
venomous wrath torments, strangles, racks...
every bone in mine entire body

suicidal ideations haunt every
waking and sleeping...

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Senescence concomitant
and best buds with malaise
despondency inescapable as
infirmity ages formerly young gals guys
though age just a "number"
father time not shy to apprise

every mortal wakes to the
inescapable truth that never dies
each living species mainly
one known as...

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