Long Faintness Poems
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We should love our enemies as ourselves
Just love, love our enemies as ourselves
it's a just part of the grander test
And the sounds of a shaken leaf
the wind blows as the sound of gust
It's in Jesus and God in whom we should trust
moving on the branch of a tree
It moves it slivers waving in the wind
As tho it's next of kin
God says He'll send us faintness into the hearts of the land of your enemies
It's just part of a grander test
In awe We be blessed
As the sound of a shaken leaf
So when the Father chase the enemies away
You've be alright and OK
For they shall fall when none pursuits
As the sound of a shaken leaf
inspired and taken from Leviticus 26:31
from anthology "Springs Song"
written by James Edward Lee Sr.
Written: January 26, 2024
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Rumi Quote ("Goodbyes are only for those who love with their eyes. Because, for those who love with heart and soul, there is no such thing as separation.")
All beings carry an inner flame, a divine spark,
Our goal is to allow light to shine within dark.
Everyone has a stiff gift, talent, or skill to share,
Serving others makes our souls elysian to dare.
Acts of love and caring could offer us delight,
By exhibiting warmth, not schist and phyllite.
It is our collective effort to improve life-earth,
When our soul's task is what drives us to birth,
We feel content and halcyon in our actual sense,
We are aware that we are shifting our presence.
Beyond everything else, this ought to be crucial,
Aversely relishing awards of hustle for frugal.
Spirit is a passenger on an arduous path,
An odyssey spanning countless sides of wrath.
Soul grows and evolves with its realness,
And draws nearer to its trustworthy purpose.
Spirit vision is to testify that it is divine,
To meld in a sumptuous root, letting it shine.
Doing so implies soul concedes vanity,
And wholeheartedly embrace its core chirality.
Embracing an ethereal embedded element,
Fulfill fair function, fixing forthright firmament.
Realizing we're not the dreaming dual drama,
Bilocation hints to grasp a restive soul's lama.
The path of a spirit can be filled with faintness,
Yet it regularly bestows layers of greatness.
Following death, psyche gains fresh insight,
It blooms and grows in power and oblivion rite.
Spirit will ultimately fulfill its destiny,
And shall be united with its roots celestially.
But, in any case, the soul persists in its path,
Expanding and maturing with every wrath.
I yearn to silence this constant static,
The immutable humming
Always in the back of my mind.
I long to cease the feeling of feeling—
To be able to relax finally
Without thoughts flooding my mind
In an unstoppable wave that sweeps my energy with it
The existential fatigue, the kind
that leaves my hands detached and cold
in a derealized world of fog.
A reality distorted, as if fabricated.
It's the place where faintness feels non-physical,
But like a state of mind one slips into—
An untethered dream, where certainty is doubted.
Yet, I still cherish life.
For the moments of warmth and love
Pull me up from this haze, above the clouds.
But I wish not for an after,
Where my soul must linger in immortalization;
I wish for my soul to simply
Dissipate…
To be freed like evaporated water
Returning to the sky,
To experience life before life.
The glare of my dissent carves in a distance
Between my thoughts and the woven fabric
Of a society where for most, God is savior
Yet a being I refuse to acknowledge.
For if He exists, then even in His heaven,
I remain damned.
The apprehension of my psyche hides,
Behind my ribs— the lassitude of self-awareness.
So I crave an eternal oblivion,
My senses dissolved within the void.
I wait for the internal noise to mute—
Without pain
And without death.
The faintness of flight overwhelms me
boxed in caged, corseted, in a cattle car of the air
pristine bells and whistles cajole the herd
as the breath is cycled and recycled through the
bellows of plasticine and metal
germs jumping from orifice to orifice
knees crushing bosoms braced for the portent
the potential
the promise
of the fall.
Faintness elicits only minor response
from the tenders who un-tenderly steer the crowd
small moans garner memories of the mallet falls..
but fail to unseat the kindness
so needed..sought
watery eyes wave
and the floor seems the only safety
and still the settlers stay settled in their complacency..
neither rising to gift an aged woman with their perch
or commenting as she hits the floor
ah the joys of twenty first century flight
in the belly of Virgin America.
you crawled from the bottom
of tomorrow withered beneath
my feet the smell of forgotten
earth arose bountiful cruelty
emerged my mind craved awful
goodness standing before me
a hidden figure moving behind
the darkness legs unevenly bent
backwards standing there with
broken blood stained wings a tear
as hard as tar remained on your
cheek who are you why are you
here filled with dreary contempt
faintness shyness bestowed such
a tyrant entity taunting me with
childlike eyes beckoning my mothers
instinct to nurture this creature of
darkness my mind said don't do not
covenant nor comfort the muses of
norse ravenlike energy look away and
yet the dry warm breeze gathered
from your heavy breathing seated
in a mystic garden sprouting inside
my bedroom Odin standing over me
i whisper you must please go now
you're not supposed to be here
knowing full well tomorrow is near
Capsulate, wrenching wore around the nook
Never asked to swing her lips and hardness hook
A scary flood of fumes, fire her tears
And the invoice innocence of her beats
Enormously resonant as the dark dirt
Self-like a famished, fainted convert
Echoes the intensity of despair, she oftenly hides
Yet, quietness and lowliness wove at every side
She the rose’ pearl, mourns with an unbearable bow
Vulnerable Bones, cracked beats, and broken hurls
Yet, the prayer’s mat, where she cures and curls
Heaviness altogether haunts her innerness
But, believe her brilliance, vanishing faintness.
The awful feeling tightens my vocal cords
that praised another god who never denied pleasures;
I abandoned faith and despised kindness:
it's time for God to show anger through ransacking,
taking away all favoritism and getting
a payback for disobedience and unclean living.
I've tasted death and cried with a constant sob,
did I merit such a punishment? I nodded and accepted
whatever God sent me and the woes were shame and agony;
ah! The day has come and I am stripped of all vanity!
What's the purpose behind this? There are people who rob
and murder inflicting pain on others; I pursued goals
not so pleasing to Him and gave in to the Deceiver
who stile the holiness I geld sacred and it cost me despair
and restless nights, until this violent storm stroke and battering waves
made me wreck before I reached my harbor: why was God so merciless?
Rebelling against the Almighty, it's not appreciating sacred life;
if our youth is a factor of rebellion: what causes such antagonism?
Fighting for freedom without imposed restrictions on anyone
is feeling invulnerable and ready to brandish deadly weapons
on the ones who are faithful and are showered with blessings...
as they bow in prayer and show devotion to Him who rewards them!
Rebelling against the Almighty has the harshest retribution ever felt
by a mere mortal who battles with His will despite the faintness of heart!
You were the witness
Of my gradual disappearance
I evaporated one look at a time
Beneath your harshness
You so vibrant
Me cloaked in my shyness
You not seeing
Or wondering whyness
My smile lost all its brightness
My spirit its lightness
You became more brilliant
Rising in heightness
As I faded into my blackness
You became sheer whiteness
I was all wrongness
You were always rightness
In the beginning
You gifted me your kindness
Looking past my frogyness
You were my royal highness
A princess gifted with open mindedness
With you I felt a level of significance
That proved to be a risky business
I felt like a strong person
But in the end l lacked fitness
Do you remember
My exuberance
The way I danced in my freeness
How you saw much more
Instead of so much lessness
I could just be myselfness
Before all the craziness
The impatience
I exchanged my substance for faintness
Yes you were the witness
To my gradual disappearance
Our no longer in syncness
Somehow losing the us significance
You the unaware witness
With no remembrance
So I let go of your promises
They were never meant to be
The realization of my happiness
Do not worry, I am not currently going through this.
Form:
Grieved our word by breach of faintness.
Fraud pains and shivers us wordless
Had no clue, what had given us
God, join us in one love and grace.
Heaven is broad secret above.
Our parents' love will aid and move.
Ready to merge in love and sense
God, join us in one love and grace.
Strange and hue's world is mystery.
We talked quite than learned drearily.
We presume from what they told us.
God, join us in one love and grace.
our lives are intertwined through time.
we soar and grow close by yet mime.
Current love's bolted growth is false.
God, join us in one love and grace.
We thereafter wept our blunders.
Things were expressed that can't be changed.
Cleave the most of your one life chance
God, join us in one love and grace.
Said things we're inept to bear back.
Guided us onto the right track.
Prize memories righted themselves.
God, join us in one love and grace
Faintness may give the impression of fading separation.
An art lesson for a seeker. The seeker will then
point to what remains, when fading ends, as the recognition
sought..formlessness pointing to nothing. Or the seeker
might see the faintness as increasing separation. Nothing
appearing more and more distinct and definitional. Both
processes are, however, quite enticing, but futile. Liberation
is the end of process with this spontaneous appearance,
which resists any and all definition..but may include
the processes and enticements suggested by artful faintness.