Long Crapper Poems

At the footbridge Sue was meeting her beau
(He was married to a woman called Flo)
Sue soon found out his deception
She dismembered his erection
For his love life it was a massive blow

To the hospital fled poor...

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Twice told toilet tale – a cheeky execrable gross fable

which poetic product best be affixed 
with hashtag STINKY label.

As a young whippersnapper
and one precocious lad to boot,
I discovered common combustible materials
found in the bathroom.

At opportune...

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O.K. here is what happened. Went for dinner at neighborhood C.B. and ordered my usual.Waitress new to the game immediately brought our tea with our bread.Had the option of hot bread now or cold bread...

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People ask me a lot why do I write
Well...Pain is Lyrics am I right
It constricts my heart ever so tight
I try to break the hold with all my might
But the pain is 2 strong
In this...

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Your rhyme reads like a rap they say,
a rap I say,
a rap they say,
perhaps but rap is rhyme you see,
it's rhyme really,
it's rhyme you see,
this poem is not lyrical,
no not at all,
not lyrical,
'cus songs use...

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AL ::::: WHAT A PAL ??

I will assume you know AL, to many he's a pal
A fake friend to the end, to the grave he will send
        ...

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Cousin Donald Comes to Town ...

Elroy was all cock-a-hoop cos
cousin Donald was a-comin'
a visiting & they were so darn
chuffed & tremblin' in anticipation
that friday night the seven of them
in the one bed had a real...

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I'm near cuckoo
This Monday blue
A day not eas'ly recommended
for making sense
I'm way too tense
And hung-over to comprehend it
 
My mind's on the bend
my imaginary friends
are threatening to abandon en masse
I was perfectly sane
till they pissed...

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Savez vous planter les choux 
A la mode de chez nous?
(French nursery rhyme)

You should eat your cabbage up my son
It's really quite delicious
May I forego the pleasure Ma
To me it is pernicious 

But it must...

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PLASTIC BAG:  THE SAGA CONTINUES

Yes, they laughed at him, full of hot air, but he died trying.
It’s easy to forget that  -  it seems  -
Plastic bags too have ambitions, careers, dreams.
He...

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Copyright 2014 ALL RIGHTS RESERVED
Poetic Lyrics By Thomas Lam Hsi


THERE IS ONLY ONE TRUE GOD...THE LORD GOD ALMIGHTY...WHO ALONE CAN
SAVE FROM Satan...who plays 'all' roles...the devil...the 'Lord Jesus'...
the 'Father'...the 'Holy Spirit'...all 'Other Gods'...and 'alien gods'...HE...THE
LORD...

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Copyright 2014 ALL RIGHTS RESERVED
Poetic Lyrics By Thomas Lam Hsi


THERE IS ONLY ONE TRUE GOD...THE LORD GOD ALMIGHTY...WHO ALONE CAN
SAVE FROM Satan...who plays 'all' roles...the devil...the 'Lord Jesus'...
the 'Father'...the 'Holy Spirit'...all 'Other Gods'...and 'alien gods'...HE...THE
LORD...

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holy diluted cold water
did you see that there
its, little grandma mini 
streaking, in her Sunday's best 
tighty-whitie underwear 

come on now
lets catch her quick 
before, she completely lose it 
or she strips right out of...

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Vidtec and US Games were made for the Atari VCS.
Some of them were great while others were a mess.
US Games and Vidtec were a division of Quaker Oats.
But the creators found it extremely difficult to...

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When the owls are out of town
his studded boots kick-up featherless hoots.
He is the creak and groan of tired wood,
The splutter of an old aircon
yet more;
all inexplicable noises belong to him.
He crawls through crawl spaces...

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Shiny and white, it’s always awake.
It’s even got a seat for both of your cakes.
Calming and cool it holds such beauty.
It’s mans best friend when you’re feeling a bit tooty

It’s a cradle for your face...

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Heebiejeebie Hocus-Pocus

Don't forget your incantations
Gods wait with inoculations
Only for you and your relations
Have faith my friend, in creation
Above all else know your station
It depends on where you're from
Allah, Buddha, Genghis Khan
Which ever one takes your...

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For months I've been away from the Soup
And I just learned about all the scoop
Contest on crap and farts
From smelly body parts
Toilet humor all 'bout making poop

Wife got mad when I forgot to flush
She yelled...

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