The scent of hims in her life
First her daddy
Then her prom date
Finally, her husband
But wait she has a son
A new cologne
Horn Trump Humorous Haiku
when Trump had to pick
out from official would kick
always made us sick
should see his small pause
made a lot of Hims and haws
broke all of the laws
Trump a nincompoop
awkward with a hula hoop
with a gawdy group
likes pie of pecan
Trump would serve it on front lawn
ate until all gone
I have often wondered on a silent night when stars are all I see
If there is someone on a distant star who’s looking up at me…
I wonder…looking up…how many life forms can there be…
and if I ever met one would he or she look or act like me
Can he walk and talk and sing and dance?
Can she climb a tree…or swim?
I’ve even often wondered if they come in hers and hims?
Do they have mountains on their stars?
Do they have trains and planes and cars?
If they have a sun and moon…do they rise and set like ours?
Do they have lakes and oceans?
What do they do for fun?
Are they divided into separate groups…or do they live as one?
I wonder if our two stars ever met…how well would we blend?
And is it even possible for two stars to be friends?
Yes, I have often wondered on a silent night when stars are all I see
If there is someone on a distant star who’s looking up at me…
Are there other beings wondering the same…as they look at the stars?
And though I do not know the answer…
I like to think there are.
While Watching Golden Globes
Probably are watching the Golden Globes;
Long dangling earrings hanging from lobes;
No hims and haws;
Only loud applause;
Delightful entertainers were there in droves.
Jim Horn
Hims a cute, him so sweet and pretty cat
Kitty kitty liver spots from over drinking
Hanging out down town at the local litter box
Whiskey sours and meows by the hour
He calls his children kittens
They look cute too in their little fur suits
Puddytat gets drunk as hell
Sharpened whiskers, claws and teeth come out
Tell a tale of something else
Appearances are everything in the alley
Guns and weapons are ready
Kitty kitty sports a small black marble
Where there once was an eye lost in a fight
A pirates patch covers the past as he goes by
Cat keeps the other eye out for murder
But only when he's sober
Nine lives and nine rounds of live ammo
Locked and loaded for battle
Never bring a knife to a cat fight
Cats fire at will when having fun
Using paws because they have no fingers
Not even one
Authors note: I thought I saw a puddy cat. You did...You did see a puddy cat!
There's a young fellow on P-Soup by the name of Tim
Ladies love him and wished they could tickle his chin
Among other naughty things
Much sadness it did bring
For Tim is the Daddy of a bunch of wee “hims”
© Jack Ellison 2015
It's funny
How did a computer
A silly computer
A flat screened computer
Become my obsession?
I wake up
There it is
Waiting
Begging
Inticing
"Turn me on"
"play with my buttons"
I look at the bright screen
Remembering the Poltergeist warning
"Don't go into the light"
But it's so pretty!
I'm sure I'll be alright
Eyes see
Pupils dilate
Pulse quickens
As my fingers tap feverishly on keys
Traveling to different places with ease
Wondering
Who else sees
Images like these
Hers and hims and other me..s
Infected by their computer disease
Friends I connect with
Around the clock
Ticking while I'm talking
And wrestling with a sock
Late for work again
What a shock
A cup of coffee
on the keyboard spilled
My glowing obsession
is sadly killed
Emotional me
With remorse I'm filled
Then I pause until I'm chilled
I reach for my smart phone
Thankfuly I'm OK
I can keep in touch anyway
Here in my pocket
I have a way to play
A portable flat screened obsession
I can access night and day!
For Carol's Computer Contest.
da big puppee wun away twees ma ma get foe mee peese we no do that baby go bye bye hims bad bo-bo dats gweezwy dada whaauh maa maa say no doggie wiee where him go dolly dat wayee waite hunnie hunnie nooowaa mawmie wiee daddie in twee
The dreaded Cancer, seems to me,
gets much too much publicity.
In restaurants, both fast and fine,
at parties up and down the line,
in hurried conversations at
the place I buy food for my cat,
the barber or the hairdressers,
wherever gather hims and hers,
the Cancer Chat is all the rage.
Why, one can hardly turn a page
of any monthly, weekly, daily,
but there is “Cancer” hearty-haley
written or advertised about
as if its fame must be spread out
to every cranny dark or light.
You’d think Cancer was boon not blight.
And clearly there is some obsession
within the medical profession
for keeping Cancer at the core
of physiological lore.
They pet- or ct-scan every inch
if we complain of ache or pinch.
Mention a pain, from toe to eye?
They’ll send you for an MRI.
Amounts of money much too great
are spent, as if to celebrate
the lure of Cancer’s beck and call—
I’m sick and tired of it all.
But please...don’t tell another soul
I’m sick and tired. Just say “he’s whole”
if they should question, give that answer
or I’ll be suspected of having Cancer!
PRICE LESS
And I, stood staring at the door,
I knew he would walk into,
Hoping like many times before,
He would look me through,
Like a woman, his woman,
Hoping it’s his turn,
To love me like his only one,
Love me like it should have been,
Like am the only one he has ever seen,
But he walks,
Stares, never talks,
He hits me,
Abuses, thinks I ‘am not pretty
He says it to me, Again,
Inflicts that place in my heart, pain
I leave, am through,
Damn am so through!
Tired of being stuck on you,
He calls hims a man, yet never was
Just another man with own flaws,
Ain’t random, can’t get this on sale
You say you love me then you oughtta treat me well,
I am a woman, I ‘v needs,
I ’v got ego, I ’v got swag,
It all comes without a price tag…
He thought I would stay,
He should v known ….
I am PRICELESS.
PRICE LESS
And I, stood staring at the door,
I knew he would walk into,
Hoping like many times before,
He would look me through,
Like a woman, his woman,
Hoping it’s his turn,
To love me like his only one,
Love me like it should have been,
Like am the only one he has ever seen,
But he walks,
Stares, never talks,
He hits me,
Abuses, thinks I ‘am not pretty
He says it to me, Again,
Inflicts that place in my heart, pain
I leave, am through,
Damn am so through!
Tired of being stuck on you,
He calls hims a man, yet never was
Just another man with own flaws,
Ain’t random, can’t get this on sale
You say you love me then you oughtta treat me well,
I am a woman, I ‘v needs,
I ’v got ego, I ’v got swag,
It all comes without a price tag…
He thought I would stay,
He should v known ….
I am PRICELESS.
pushin it out of my mind, Its time to move on
forget about the ones who left you behind
may it be family, friends, or foe
forget how much you may have loved them so
they really don't know you, at all
the person they left behind, was weak and small
but you have out grown them all
the Shes were all sluts
the Mes just all about going to get a nut
and the hers and hims were only about thems
and you are on the real
so don't you worry it going to be hot
you will never be stopped
and no one will ever hold me back again
now i can shout it out to the world
i wrote this~
aka:lyricvixen
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