He was born in Groesbeck, Texas and his name was Joe Don Baker.
Sadly, after living for nearly nine decades, he needed an undertaker.
He attended North Texas State College on a sports scholarship.
He starred in "The Living Daylights", "Cape Fear" and "Joysticks".
When I say that he was a very talented man, it's not a joke.
He died of lung cancer which proves that people shouldn't smoke.
After living for eighty-nine years, he perished and it's a shame.
Joe Don Baker was a skilled actor who was destined for fame.
[Dedicated to Joe Don Baker (1936-2025) who died on May 7, 2025]
Life has many ups and downs
Personally more ups than downs
A happy life with many more years
A bunch more smiles than frowns
Surely one of the fortunate ones
The genes were a very huge factor
Nine girls and me at a baseball team
Each game we had our own sector
Yup nine girls and then li'l ole me
The talk of our little old berg
The Ellison's have finally had a boy
Biggest news our town had heard
Dancing in the streets all night long
A celebrity at a tender young age
So spoiled with all those girls around
To fawn over this sweet wee babe
Turned out to be a stunning specimen
Can still bring it at eighty-nine!
It's getting to be a lot tougher though
But that's it I'm feeling just fine!
Inspired by the song of the same name by Iron Maiden
In nineteen eight-four, a heavy metal band
made a statement about a minute hand.
The Doomsday Clock was ticking down,
telling us we might not be around -
much longer.
You could say, now is now, and then was then,
But, maybe, it's nineteen eighty-four again,
except, that now, it is the second hand,
to tell us how long we have left to stand -
on earth.
Today, the timer stands at eighty-nine -
makes you wanna drink Drano or turpentine.
It's not that I want to cry or make a fuss,
but the murderer, my friends, is us -
you and I.
There are many ways that we could all die.
You might think we should get ready to say goodbye.
Nukes, climate change, and greenhouse gasses,
are some things that could kill the masses -
uh oh.
How ever did we get into this mess?
I do not know the answer, I confess.
How can the human race resolve it?
Those who caused it, now must solve it -
you and I
June twenty -first Nineteen eighty-nine
Your father proudly proclaims
This baby girl is mine
Life was never dull with you around
Hope, love and sadness
Could always be found
Family to you was number one
You proved to us many times
The way you raised your son
You battled demons and won the fight
With family and friends
Your future was in sight
The Angels came on Valentines Day
A massive stroke your last fight
February sixteenth they led you away
Go now my beautiful niece
Be with Grandma and Papa
Pain is gone now Rest in Peace
Seen splendid things in eighty-nine years
But one thing that stands out are girlie's cute rears
If I lose my seeing
My touchy feeling
Then I guess I might as well call it a career
I nearly hanged, it was my fate
In seventeen eighty nine
I had stolen an old fur tippet
And claimed that it was mine
They put me into prison
Then sent me to be tried
The verdict came back guilty
and many tears I cried
But through the grace of mad King George
came a welcome dispensation
My sentence was commuted
and I was handed transportation
The journey was horrendous.
Eleven months or more.
Till we landed in Australia
That far and distant shore
And what this place has given me
When all is rendered down
Is a life I never would have had
In the slums of London Town.
sincerely, yours, Mary Wade
Transportation of convicts to Australia began in 1787 and continued until 1868. During this time, approximately 163,000 convicts were transported on 825 ships
Don't back up car near neighbor's pool
Do pay your latest traffic fine.
Close window first, then yell, "you fool!"
It's wise to always look behind.
If driving an elderly "jewel,"
remember: gears aren't there to grind
If all else fails, try traffic school.
Take bus if over eighty-nine.
On June 7th, 1944
two thousand
six hundred
and eighty-nine people
were on a ship named
Susan B Anthony.
The ship sank off Normandy
in France, and every single
one of these people survived.
What could have been a disaster
was a June miracle.
Don't know how many years I have left
Could be one, could be ten, could be twenty
Pretty good shape for a man of eighty-nine
But I'm starting to think of it plenty
It's only natural as you get along in years
To start wondering when that day will arrive
When your numbers are up, the end of the line
No matter how hard we try to survive
Can't imagine people who end their own lives
They know they'll be gone and forgotten
Everything they've lived for since childhood
Must really have reached rock bottom
Even with what seems like my upbeat nature
Must admit it's on my mind quite a lot
Guess it's only natural considering my years
We eventually reach the end of the plot
In all honesty don't think I'll be leaving just yet
With my family history of longevity
Living well into their late eighties was common
So worrying is really not necessary
Almost eighty-nine and life's still a blast
How long will it continue, how long will it last
Pushing the odds
Testing the gods
Will I still be around when one hundred I pass
Born in London in eighteen eighty nine,
a 'rags to riches' story just like mine.
His childhood was full of horrid violence.
In adulthood he was the king of silence.
In silent reels of comedy he found his fame.
Moving to America is where he made his name.
Through slapstick hilarity and tender tears,
he entertained the world for countless years,
Known for his speech in the Great Dictator,
mocked Hitler, but was seen as a traitor.
Criticised for refusing to go to war.
He was a pacifist, so it caused uproar.
He said his mum was the first to inspire,
he was knighted by the British Empire.
Married four times with eleven children,
had many affairs seen as forbidden.
His laughter was born from the deepest pain.
His artistic spirit will always remain.
He mirrored life in hues of black and white,
whilst painting dreams as a beacon of light.
Mom, sighing, says I'm tired of chocolate,
as if the favorite treat
of her eighty-nine years
suddenly grew two heads,
becoming an unwelcome
familiar, tormenting her in old age.
My bones are creaking and my bed is squeaking
Im one short of eighty nine
Bosom friends come gather around me
Lets crack some jokes and drink some wine
Long lost relatives are looking me up
Their eye on my wealth, damn they really suck
I spend my days thinking what must I do
I want to leave it to someone who is true
There is a beggar on my street who wishes me well
I think I could leave him some and make him swell
Or the garbage man who comes knocking at my door
Cleans my porch and the verandah floor
Missionaries of charity, that’s where I will put some
For the cause of orphaned kids, lost and lonesome
Or to the church which I often visited
Where I’ve left my prayers and alms distributed
But to that crafty old woman who walked out on me
I will leave my rusty ring on the tombstone in the cemetery
when I die I will send you a sign
this was from my grandma who was eighty-nine
I will send you a bird that looks like an afghan, okay?
I thought this was hilarious, on a warm summer Tuesday
she died within the month and a bird came to me
it was a loud ugly thing, with a ruffled beak you could see
looked like an alien bird with a crocheted neck and face
by crackee, grandma had done it, and she’d done it with grace
Youth, having deserted them long ago, Tom and Sam
The octogenarians together formed an intimate league.
Every day, they would, meet at the country park in the evenings.
A ritual, they had religiously followed and enjoyed much.
One day Tom didn’t show up and Sam conjectured, he was unwell.
Sam felt anxious but suppressed his commotion inside.
As time moved on, Sam slowly grew reconciled to the fact,
That he had lost a bosom friend whom he would never again see.
But one day when Tom suddenly made his appearance at the park,
Sam asked what had happened to him, Tom replied calmly- “I had been in jail.” “Jail – What in the world for”?? Sam couldn’t hide his shock n’ wonder. Tom asked, “Don’t you remember the little waitress at the coffee shop?”
“Once having grown a little amorous, I had flirted with her for a little while,
But she filed a rape charge against me! At eighty-nine, I felt so proud,
That when I got into the court, I pleaded guilty, and that damn judge,
Gave me 30 days of imprisonment…. for…… PERJURY”!
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