Dishwasher Poems | Examples


Premium Member Goldfish fighting in my dishwasher

I'm slowly evaporating from this verbal tennis match 
For some reason we continue to give breath to these vapor windy circles
Brewing a coffee tornado that is going to spill all over my shirt
And they say don't cry over spilled milk, but there's a river of rain I've been holding back
And I'll be damned if I let this game end at 40 love
But is victory really as sweet when blood sheds from pain and not perseverance 
I'll keep painstakingly swimming even when the water is above my head
Because when you take that 1 second to notice everything around you
The dirty food tables are eventually going to be clean
The question isn't who is going to do the dishes
But when will we stop acting like goldfish fighting in my dishwasher 
And look outside the glass to see a whole world needing just one person to keep swimming
p.s. you don’t have to tread water when you can float with your reflection...

Sludge Behind the Dishwasher

As the weather chooses its flavour for the hour,
Stubble-ended wood shaves itself on the layers of unseen ground.
Synthetic puke seeps through pores seeking to devour
Every tiny, curled hair floating in the murk around and around.

Pool party skies reside a millimeter higher than the tallest fingertip:
Leftovers infect this mass of last meals passed on.
A spindle of cloth runs out with time enough to graze my lip
And still no locks of winter-lived years could sink a single talon
Into the darkest dark of fleeting moments taken from a fork.
Shall this be all that has come from years after that first unscrewed cork?


Premium Member Dishwasher

I have an Ultra Quiet with a whir.
Frigidaire 24" Built-In White Dishwasher,
Energy saver, with hot and cold stir.
For a while it did purr.
Oh yes, they do make a dishwasher.
Naïve people believe what labels sell.
I use a lemon scent liquid gel
Those states; "No" pre-washing,
Leaves dishes sparkling.
All lies, it makes the dishes look like hell.

I have hard water in my home,
So, the liquid soap makes no foam.
Barnacles have formed,
Heating elements deformed.
It’s getting so old; I just don't know.
I think it can do the job, but woe.
Baskets are crumbling with rust, no more glow.
It’s ready to blow and overflow.

It’s an Ultra Quiet with a snore,
Frigidaire 24" Built-In White Dishwasher, for
Energy saving, but No, not any more,
I do need a new dishwasher to match my décor.
I'm tired of this dish washer, I’m done, I want it out the door.




3/5/2023

Premium Member Ode To a Dishwasher

In my small kitchen she sits
Simple and plain
My mechanical maid
Who never complains
Who takes cups and plates laid
On her long arms with ease
And returns every one
Scrubbed clean of grease

Because I am NOT at the sink, wrists plunged in grime
I have precious time - and peace of mind -
To fashion and design these meandering lines
This is the gift she grants -so humble, so grand
Yet after decades of duty, she's become tired
Sputtering and leaking from weakening wires
Like all teachers and nurses, she deserves to retire

When I told him it was time to buy
A new dishwasher, he said the price was too high
I say, the value of my sanity
Is worth more than his 200 channels of cable TV
(of which he watches only three)
Or his mountains of Lego, or toys for his truck
For those, he'll happily spend a buck!
So dear, after next Saturday's barbeque
I'll let you scrape off all the gristle and goo
Then maybe you'll appreciate what a dishwasher can do~

3/01/23

Unloading the Dishwasher

Ting-ting
The forks
are put to bed


Dishwasher

The dishwasher watches, waits confounded
as knuckles redden and waterlogged fingers
scrub and rub in a slick soapy dance.
Later I will explain to the machine
that it was made by atheists to replace prayer.
Meanwhile bubbles pop their silent hallelujahs.
Hands toil at their holy work.

Premium Member The Dishwasher

Once there was a dishwasher leak
That went on and on for a week
It flooded the clean floor 
Sorrow ran in the door
The situation looked so bleak 

The pit bull bit the wife when she hand fed
Naughty devil in disguise watched as she bled
Now the  old husband is retired
He is caught in the line of fire
Dish washer with apron he has been lead

He called the repair man in secret
He whispered as it was the bleakest
Get the parts sent by air express
Get here so fast speed in excess
As he whispered this is so freakish 

My dishwasher is leaking a river when it drains so we are having to hand wash dishes 
until the repair man can get parts to fix it..The dog bit my hand and I have an open wound which doesn't need to be in dish water. I asked the retired husband to help. He told me he was going to call the repair man and tell him to have those parts delivered by air express..Then he said I kind of like doing this and I am good at it so I think I will apply for a job doing it for pay..LOL>>ROTFL

The Dishwasher - a Tribute To a Major Appliance Poetry Contest

I really love the dishwasher
And so does Mum and Dad!
We filled it after every meal,
Until one day I heard a squeal!
Water had poured all over the floor
But hadn’t made it under the door!
Until the appliance was in the pink
Dishes were washed in the sink.
That really was not much fun,
It’s fair to say it was none!
Dishwashers can break in a blink
But it’s so much better than using the sink!

Premium Member A Tribute To a Major Appliance Dishwasher

I'm an Ultra Quiet with a whir
Frigidaire 24” Built-In White Dishwasher
Energy saver 
With hot and cold stir
Oh yes they do make a dishwasher

I’m getting so old they just don't know
They think I can do the job like a pro
Baskets are crumbling
Rust on everything
I'm ready to blow and overflow

Naive people believe what labels sell
They use a lemon scent liquid gel
States; “No" pre-washing
Leaves dishes sparkling 
All lies, it makes the dishes look like hell

They have hard water in their home
So the liquid soap makes no foam
Barnacles have formed
Heating elements deformed
I'm tired of their complaints when they get home

I'm an Ultra Quiet with a snore
Frigidaire 24” Built-In White Dishwasher
Energy saver 
No, not any more
Oh yes, they do need a new dishwasher

9/22/2015

Contest Name: A Tribute to a Major Appliance 
Sponsor: Mary Oliver Rotman

The Poor Dishwasher - Contest

I am here behind a closed door
Looking clean and gleaming
Oh my what is that smell I just got a whiff
smells like curry hope I am dreaming

They won't knock of the excess from the plate
The rice gets in my tubes and makes me hick up
The smell makes my motor lurch
Before you stack them, I shout, scrape it off

In come the dishes and bowels they used
Nothing is worse for me than cold curry for sure
Stuck  to the plates , my work will be hard
Why don't they eat jelly, so soft so pure

Oh they turn up my programme
Will be sweating in here
All they needed to do was, rinse  off the debris
Life would be simple why don't they hear.

Ok sauna here we go,round and round I spin
Geez I am dizzy, rice everywhere
Every orifice it can get in
No thoughts for me the worker, they don't care.

My work is done 
gleaming dishes once more
My head is still aching, 
Please, no more dirty dishes to abhor

penned 10 September 2015

Dishwasher Catacombs

Melted butter
Missed crumbs of toast 
Blue-ribbon cooking 
In dishwasher catacombs
Remnants of delicious memories

The Dishwasher

Tom the Dishwasher
Hand wash each time
Place in drainboard,
Always forget the gloves,
Hands get greasy, yuck, slime!
Drainboard sits on my
Electric dishwasher,
Used once in two years,
Just what is packed,
Between my ears?

Maybe cause the paper plates
and plastic utensils
Didn't fare so well,
Oh, you know how weird
Is Tom Bell

Should'a put a pinball
Machine, in that slot,
Play the Who's Tommy,
Bet I'd play real hot!

The one time I used,
sometime last year,
Still await unloading...
Is that laughter I hear?

Now if I was normal,
I'd be quite dull,
But never worry,
My brain is void and null!

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