'Nothing works faster'
the advertisement read
'Nothing works better'
the adman said
I don't know about you
but if that's true
it's Nothing for me
Nothing's a keeper
not only that
it's also cheaper
Well a friend of mine says he does not like sugar cookies so I wrote this poem for him...lol
Well my friend,
A sugar cookie am I
Here to make you sigh
With delight
All night
If necessary,
Good with diary,
Or tea
Even coffee
If need be.
Sometimes sprinkled with
Color delight
Taking flight
Into tummy dreams
Or aches, being
Irrisistable, home made
Better than store bought,
Fighting for my place
On a platter between every
Other kind.
Do you mind that I stand out
With a dimpled sugar smile,
Oops forgot this cookie is
Not your style,
Sighhhh!
But I won't cry,
Someone out there is yearning for me
Pity you...passing me
OVER!
All dressed up in a box with a pink bow...
It Is usually a given
Prices will always rise
Like invading oil-rich countries
Over the most ridiculous lies
But there was no protest
The Bible says they're bad people
And now our wholesale murder
Has not saved one wooden nickel
So to my surprise
TV prices begin to drop?
There would be a revolution
To protect our digital God
Since truth is not truth
Until it is seen on the screen
Even God cannot rival
The truth of this new TV
It is quite a simple gadget
And so cheap to make
It has not even one circuit
And no warranty to take
It has only one wire
Making it easy to sell em
You put it behind your head
And screw it into your cerebellum
The French are withdrawing a thousand troops
From Afghanistan
Before the end of the year
But only if they are not killed
Too many coffins
Don’t look good
On the French president’s desk
People can count
Especially the dead
Dumped on foreign ground
Without a body bag
Coffins cheaper by the dozens
The French
Are withdrawing a thousand troops
From Afghanistan
Before the end of the year
But only if they are not killed
Too many coffins
Don’t look good
On the French president’s desk
People can count
Last year I put myself on a budget
Nothing I'd buy that I didn't need
Till the time came I started to fudge it
All the warning signs I didn't heed
Far from a shopaholic I am
But I'll admit I do like to spend
Pretending I didn't would just be a sham
Got a few bucks you might like to lend?
Music cd's send me all awhirl
Kitchen gadgets my weakness too
Lovin' those shoes like a regular girl
Oh but this year I'm thinkin' it through
Better reel it in and tighten those reins
Wishin' that money grew on trees
Being cheap to myself is givin' me pains
Not shopping brings me to my knees!
**For New Year's Resolutions" contest
Sponsored by Carolyn Devonshire
(Haiku)- * Motive, infidelity messing with the Queen Bee's Honey*
Queen Bee sits on throne,
Bumble and drone bees as one
Sample flowers dew
------------------------
(Limerick) - *Admission of guilt leads to compensation*
Indeed this is how the story unfolds,
Pete said, "It's a poor rat with only one hole"...
Love had taught a sad lesson;
Divorce court was now in session,
Judge rules favor, Pete's pockets full of holes...
----------------------------
(Couplet) - *Take vows seriously payback often belongs to Spouse - Queen Bee*
Love said, "Pete too late you've opened your peepers"....
"Man, you should know it was cheaper to please her"!
Submitted for P.D.'s Divorce Club Contest (Haiku-Limerick-Couplet)