A charley horse is killing me, so I am dragging my left foot
I cannot meet for lunch, for my face is full of dirty soot
I am limping a little thanks to a torn meniscus on my knee
You will have to have your church tea without little ole me
Arthritis is crippling my fingers, so I cannot do quilting you see
My eyes are doing poorly, so I cannot help with the spelling bee
Baked goods are not possible, my oven is on the blink.
I cannot bathe your baby; there is a cobra in my sink.
I cannot meet you that day; I have an appointment I know.
I despise giving you these excuses because I love you so.
Maybe I could meet you next September for some dinner.
I want to wait until then, in the hopes I might be thinner.
Ouch! Alright, I confess to overuse,
But easy does it, tiger. Good grief!
Must you kick me when I'm down?
When do you go numb? I beg, release...
Your grip on my achy calf muscle!
Chasing the gold
Charley got old
Youth passed him on the course
left him with his namesake
~ poor charley horse
OLD CHARLIE
Old Charlie played ball too long, and of course
He played with gusto, with real driving force
How his muscles, they ached
He cried out, For Goodness' sake!'
~ Today medics call this a 'charley horse.'
ROMEO
Romeo was a real hit with the girls
They swooned over his long hair's golden curls
Romeo had his way
And proceeded to say
"You'll just love the flag of Rome I unfurl!"
HOCUS-POCUS
Jessica could fix computer glitches
Did so with words, without any hitches
She said, "Hocus-pocus,
Computer, please focus."
But the software, she left it in stitches
Three days of brutal angry pain has changed her
Eighty-two hours of pain
She is joyless now
Irritation and meanness,
Gritting of the teeth
Feeling mean, everything hurts
She just got a Charley Horse in her leg
Old age is killing her
She is angry with her body today
The one that is failing her
Letting her down in so many directions
Pain has changed her completely
The words are swirling today. They are gleeful and happy and kind-feeling.
I am lying in a little stupor after taking a sleeping pill that knocked me out for ten hours.
And I am watching the words whirling and curling and floating ever so gently in a cloud formation,
Not so high that I cannot reach them, for I can. I smile at them, knowing they can be used for fun.
They can cajole,
They can tease,
They can delight,
They can irritate,
They can play,
They can exude serious,
They can teach, torment, and terrify.
Words, glorious words, in the hands of writers, poets, singers, and dreamers.
Wow!
How wonderful, thrilling, and toe-curling!
I stretch my toes, my feet, get a charley horse.
Ow! Ow! Ow!
Jump out of bed, make myself a fat, happy, roast beef sandwich, snag a bag of chips and an ice tea.
Run outside to feed Shark, the cat, who lives out there in a cozy, covered, hot-platted igloo,
And sit down at this typewriter.
Where to start?
How about now!
UNSUPPORTED CODE
Loving Brothers
Hand hitting the face
Red burning titty twisters
Throbbing charley horse
Bone braking grizzly bear hug
“Now, do you submit?, . . . . ”Uncle!”
There’s a horse that I so hate to see,
and at night sometimes he visits me.
His attacks to my thigh
make me think I might die.
Wild "Charley Horse" acts horribly.
For he comes out of nowhere, so fast!
And he brings a sharp pain like a blast.
I scream like a loon
hit by a harpoon.
Then my husband awakens aghast!
But my hubbie can’t help me. That horse,
though invisible, has such great force!
How I love my reprieves
when the little beast leaves.
But his kind never stays gone, of course!
My poor calf he attacked in a pool
while I swam, and I felt like a fool
as I floundered around.
Well, I could have drowned!
He’s a mean little horse and a ghoul.
He’s got kin, and they all like the game
of bringing folks pain. One has fame
of attacking your womb
in a hospital room.
Now THAT one puts Charley to shame!!
By Andrea Dietrich
(note to those who do not know this common
American expression: Charley Horse is a leg cramp
and all the his kin are assorted types of cramps!)
For PD's "Any Poem Goes" Contest
OLD FOLKS ARE WORTH A FORTUNE
Old folks are worth A fortune
With silver in their hair, gold in
Their teeth, stones in their kidneys,
Lead in their feet and gas in their stomachs
I have become more social the passing
Of the years. I’m seeing five gentlemen every day
As soon as I wake, will forever help me
Get out of bed, Then I go to the John.
Then Charley Horse come along and when he leave
Arthur Rites shows up and stays the day,
He doesn’t stay in one place he likes to take me.
From joint to joint, after A busy day I’m glad to go to bed
With Ben Gay
My Minister said I needed to think of the hereafter
I told him I do all the time if I’m in the basement-
upstairs or in the kitchen- I ask myself “Now, What
am I here after
BY: Adella Jackson MY MOTHER