The cafeteria hums with a hundred different sounds, While I sit in the noise, keeping eyes on the ground. Fourteen feels small when you’re standing right here, And seventeen’s close, but it feels like a year. He said the age difference makes it a no, A boundary set down where I can't go.
Then his ex and her friend walk over and stare, With a flicker of something unkind in their stare. "So do you know about Riley liking you?" The words drop down like they think it’s brand new. Riley already knows how I feel inside, So why pull a thread where I’m trying to hide?
My throat tightens up, the room blurts into gray, Holding back tears that are fighting to stray. I swallow the sting, keep my head held high, So tired of the games and the half-truth lie. Just wanting someone to say what is real, Instead of making a show of the things that I feel.
I water the garden flowers
In the early morning glare
They bloom brighter after hours
Later, in the fresher air
In the coolness of the evening
Flowers smell more vividly
Their scent reminds of feeling
That you are here, close to me
We’re just sitting biding time
Till it gets too cold to sit
Faces blur, and shades entwine
There’s no ground beneath our feet..
You open your mouth
And my breath comes out
My heart spilled on your chest
I know what happens next
Fingers intertwine
I’ll let you blur the line
As our souls collide
You are me and mine
It’s destiny, magnetic force
It’s only natural, I got no choice
It’s co regulation, a chemical bond
I’m tied up, and down, there’s no way around
If there’s no one to hear it, it still makes a sound
In the dead of night
There’s no black and white
No me and you
No wrong or right
I’m scared of my pen like I was born to write
That we’re two halves
Of a different whole
Trauma bond, alcohol
Dependency and Tylenol
Spin in a circle cause the daze gets me high
Truths and a lie
We’re getting by,
year by moment
wipe your tears on my chest
I know what happens next
Beetlebum, what you done
Chasing a high on the run
Red spots adorn your skin like stars,
They burn out, arms, toes, and neck
Just from various black tars.
Horse crashes into those below,
There is no carriage, no smooth flow.
Money always runs tight, fear is high
The lungs, liver, and kidneys damaged
No matter, the goal is still to fly
China white, but nothing ceramic
Never inside, is there plastic?
No serotonin, synapses all fried
Stick the needle in, don't whine
Hope you feel the need to hide
Tired eyes open to grey
Blurred vision sets dead in stone
I turn over in bed
"Stop! Wait! Wait! Wait, Wait Meet!
Hold your eyes to the blur moon."
Sun above the head, the beauty I see is night,
All dark, the flowers, the clouds, the skies,
And the faded dusty twinkling stars up-high.
"For the avoidance of curse,
Moon was fairly beautiful.
While avoiding the moon,
My eyes were after for you."
I struggle with what happens
To all the thoughts in my brain
Quickly moving becoming a blur
Just one I want to see one plain
Instead they bounce all around
Like marbles dropped on the floor
If they would slow down for me
I’d understand myself a little more
They won’t slow down even once
So I can get a good look at them
I’m confused by my own thoughts
They always make my head swim
If you can fathom what I’m saying
I’m not worried not many really do
But those who do or may share it
They know what I’m going through
You whirl, you whir, a sparkler with no plan.
A frantic rush, chasing all you think you can.
Each flip is fragile, fleeting, never really sown.
A scatter gun feast, that leaves you all alone.
You blaze as if the world will soon ignite.
Your tiny body burns with furious light.
Your haste is commanding, yet what is it worth?
Without pausing to taste the fleeting mirth?
The garden knows your madness; it makes it clear,
That no blossom trusts your beat to linger near.
You skim, you dart, you never claim the whole.
For your shallow sips can never fill the soul.
A slower hand, will plant, endure and stay,
Learning the patient slow cadence of the day.
For haste will scatter, shatter what was planned,
Quickly yielding the dust you cannot stand.
Why do you not linger longer at what you sip?
Your feet are a blur; your body is a whip.
But, why this panicked, fevered, fleeting chase?
What force is driving you at such a pace?
Can menacing winds command you to not rest?
Or are rivals sneaking in, invading your nest?
You know a steady heart, outlasts a flashing one.
Playing slow and stead get the victory won.
When no division remains
and our soul is free from stains,
everything that is beheld,
is within consciousness held.
The pulse of life in space-time,
echoes chords of love’s bliss chime,
wherein as boundaries blur,
dormant nodes begin to stir.
As both subject and object,
magnetism rises unchecked,
held firm at a stillness point,
where light of Self we anoint.
Ascension by cessation
here in body play station,
the way we metamorphose,
gently in blissful repose.
Though ego cravings are shorn,
life as impulsed still flows on,
unfolding in slow motion,
beheld without commotion.
As both dreamer and dreamed,
bliss strobes are from our heart beamed,
mood and mode celebration,
as our soul’s meditation.
Says without glasses he cannot see.
I said, "... Blinded by my beauty."
Try to find good in each day
It helps me along my way
I look around
Trying to see where I'm bound
Hope one day I'll be found
Sometimes not so sure
Life's a blur
Anger in my heart
Won't let it tear me apart
I have to be better than that
Pulling a smile out of my hat
Concentrating not on what's bad
That makes me sad
Sometimes it is hard
Especially if my soul feels jarred
Lost in a world full of hate
Looking for a clean slate
When I'm down
I refuse to drown
Stuck in a thought
Hard fought
Your mind
I find
Is a rough place to get lost
Pain is usually the cost
Hard to separate
Love and hate
Fate
Fear leaves you stuck on the same page
Rage
Leads down an empty road
Doubles your load
Step away
Open the door to a new day
Try to smile
It will help after awhile
Make it your style.
Each morn at dawn, we are reborn,
then tendencies come into play,
attachments which are not yet sawn,
within feeble form made of clay.
With ego cravings left behind,
each morn at dawn, we are reborn,
in warmth of heart, loving and kind,
regardless of how life rolls on.
Soul’s the canvas we write upon,
as the radiance of the sun;
each morn at dawn, we are reborn,
assured that soul and God are one.
Perched atop light of God’s moonbeam,
heeding the cosmic horn, love-lorn,
recognising life’s but a dream,
each morn at dawn, we are reborn.
Life is a blur
It purrs
It whirrs
~ Puts on spurs
Getting closer to the source,
without any use of force,
we’re awareness self-aware,
playful with nary a care.
As nodes stir, boundaries blur;
head and heart, with love concur,
blissful presence feels complete,
each breath being a love tweet.
Love struck/dumb/numb/ deer in headlight look
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