Best Scare Off Poems


Premium Member If I Were Five Again

If only I could be five once more
With all the knowledge en wisdoms from distant shores
Oh what a time I would have
At only five, I would be a devilish lad

I would file tax returns just for fun
Only because I have no income
I would say five million I make
What do you think will be your take?

Let em collect from a five year old
The IRS would they be so bold?
Sure they would try, that I know
My name I would say is old Al Gore

I would eat ice cream all day
If mum said stop! Id say no way!!!!
I am only five once in a lifetime they say
So ice-cream is my right!!! For that I will fight!

I would eat cookies as meals
I am only five and not fat at all
I would eat all day and eat all night
Who the hell cares, I’ll be alright

I would fly to Las Vegas
And place bets on number five
I would date cocktail ladies
I show them five is alive

I would change my name
To Alice Cooper
And behead a few chickens
Just to be cool and scare off a few wiccans

I would buy me a bike a boat and a plane
So I could travel like Hefner and act insane
I'd have playboy bunnies, all wrapped in chocolate
Fantasies and dreams, I would swagger and strut

I would drink whiskey with cool aide cause I am only five
Happy hours I would have with hookers in dives
I would have a fake beard, so I appear six
I would listen to rock all night, ending with Styx

Donuts and Pizza, would be my daily fair
Hangovers and Playboy bunnies, why I know you’d all stare
Oh how evil I would be at this tender young age
Smoking cigars and playing the sage

Id rob me a bank for a million dollars
And spend it on Nintendo as I laugh and I holler
No way they would put a five year old in jail
Who cares anyways, you’d know I’d make bail!

Cause I would be only five

Premium Member Bees

Summer spring bright colors, smells, flowers blooming welcome feast
Amongst these bees so irresistibly attracted to sugary nectar 
A thought occurs to me, to see these little buzzing specters 
What kind of journey , these perfect pollinators wander

Antennas smell and measuring flight, zipped away to honey  
Bees bobbed among the blossoms, sip the rosy dew swoony

Blushing flowers shall rise upward towards the sky scents carried upon the lazy breeze
Pollen on their body, wings, and as they flit   
Nestling inside blooms of fields, gardens, and budding trees   
Fertilizing egg cells to make more seeds as they knit

Summer springs our new young queen bee that has been wooed
With winter reserve of honey and pollen she hibernates 
As she emerges from her nest preened vibrating her flight muscles to generate heat
Her colony ready with food to rearing the rest of the brood 
Worker bees huddled around her to protect and keep her warm  
Like a golden yellow sea of brown bands wave their bodies to scare off rude predators 

Visits of the bees help preserve and spread
Much of the existence to fields, gardens, and our natural forest 

To detach the bees from the nature would mean
The demise of countless species of flowers and plants that we fail to appreciate   


9/27/2016

Poetry Contest : Bees 
 Sponsored by: Shadow Hamilton  

antenna, waves, sky, breeze, nectar, and pollen
© Eve Roper  Create an image from this poem.

Premium Member Scarecrow

Scarecrow

You'll find me 
in paddy fields and gardens;
even on front porches. 
I'm a decoy, as lonely as can be. 
I look frozen in time, 
mimicking Jesus 
crucified on the cross, 
but I swear I mean no disrespect, 
you religious zealots! 
Blame farmers and gardeners! 
They make me look this way! 
They live to humiliate me; 
dressing me up like a ragamuffin, 
stuffing straw inside my coveralls, 
placing a dumb-looking hat 
atop my head; you name it! 
Yes, I know I look ridiculous. 
I wish I'd put 
my perennially outstretched arms down.
Don't be scared of me, kids, 
I speak no evil 
I don't speak at all, 
and I do not harm anything 
that breathes air 
Yet you humans choose to avoid me 
like the plague 
but come Halloween, 
you all love me for just a day! 
Go figure. 
Yeah, I see some of you 
staring at me, chuckling; 
whispering amongst yourselves 
about me having no brain 
in the "Wizard of Oz" movie. 
In my defense, 
It was a misrepresentation! 
I don't speak, but I'm not that dumb! 
I know how to do my thankless job 
and do it well. 
I scare off all the birds 
that peck at newly cast 
seeds of growing crops, don't I? 
Not so brainless now, am I?

Date written: 05/15/2020


Lonesome Cowboy

I heard tell some folks think cowboys built the West.
The only thing I know for sure is I always did my best
to give a man a good days work for an honest wage
ridin' among tumbleweeds and dried brush of sage.
I wear a Colt 45 to scare off rustlers and killin' snakes
and I don't play cutthroat poker with tinhorns or rakes.

It ain't never been an easy job, the life of a ranch hand,
herdin' cattle near the flowin waters of the Rio Grande,
but it's the only way I always wanted to spend my days,
beddin' down under the stars, watching the herd graze.
I'm keepin' one eye open for those wanderin' lil dogies,
chewin' on the end of what's left of smokin' my stogies.

I lassoed a proud stallion, and gentled that big paint.
He's been a good trail horse, so I got no complaint.
I was in love with a rodeo gal, a pretty lil' barrel rider
but she told me a cowboy wouldn't be a good provider.
So I strum my guitar, singing a lonesome cowboy song
about findin' a good woman who won't do me wrong.

One day I'll be an old cowpoke, lying up on that hill,
but not 'til my last roundup, and my body's had its fill
of ridin' the range, mendin' fences, ropin' mustangs,
and eatin' chuck wagon beans when the bell clangs.
I've been thrown off a bad bronc, name of Buckin' Jet,
but don't put my name on that tombstone; not just yet.



January 26, 2021
Cowboy Poetry Contest
Sponsored by: Line Gauthier

Hail-Fellow-Well-Met

Hail-fellow-well-met had hair of the dogs
                               A little pipped up to scare off the fogs
                                               A sip and a trip
                                              A night of a strip
                                 All made Hail-Fellow a passel of hogs

The Moon

I look up at the sky
The moon ,it's on its way up
There is something that makes me hiccup

Hiccup with fear
That something is very,very near

Werewolves ,zombies
It is unclear

All I know
Something is very very near

What was near
I'm still unsure
But I look up at the sky
It looks really very pure

It rippled and rippled and rippled like water

And then I hear something
Oh no they've got her
They've got my sister

Then I feel my hands
They're starting to blister

What is happening I have no idea
Then out of nowhere
I have direreaha

Out of my behind
It comes with an "Olf"

Then out of nowhere
I turn to a werewolf

I scare off the men
They run to repent
I have come come to my sisters defence

But what has caused this
Was it the moon
I don't know now
But I hope to know soon


Grouper Groper

GROUPER    GROPER

My god is this ocean getting crowded or what?
Time was I could swim here for days and spot
Not   even another Goliath Grouper
Now  I can’t even see - it’s like fog  -  a  pea-souper
Because of all these  pesky tiny fish.
Do they have no homes  to go to?   I wish !
It’s me or them  - so I’ll have to attack
I might get a few but it won’t scare off the whole pack.
But oh oh,  who’s this guy I see with the camera?
Looks like some semi-aquatic chimera
Man he’s sexy  - check those flippers  - woweee!
And the single big glassy eye  - Oh god, he reminds me of me!
Think I’m falling in love.  Better switch  to my  camera-smile.
This down-frown mouth probably ain’t  his style.
He’s no Grouper  - but he’s the best I’ve seen in a while


, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Written for  Carolyn Devonshire's  Contest   "Attack!"

In the Darkest and Coldest World

In the darkest and coldest world
one can find a flickering flame,
never allowed to shine brightly and widely
and break the macabre darkness;
nothing could escape from here,
from its torturous and squalid abyss...
where each demon has a frown of austerity: 
ah, in this obscure confinement, I'd be afraid!

In the darkest and coldest world
the isolation is unbearably horrid;
bats constantly squeak to scare off owls that coo,
hunters hear their scary sound and speedily shoot;
nobody shows compassion for the ugly creatures
that only seek warm blood to feed their bellies!

In the darkest and coldest world
demons obey their master Lucifer,
he controls them with his menacing looks
and they dare not speak a rebellious word;
this Fallen Angel with extreme handsomeness
was thrown down to beautiful Earth 
from Heaven until he would complete his wrath:
don't be prey to this vicious captor!

In the darkest and coldest world
nobody is free to breathe air and to rebel,
to plot and seek revenge in unescapable Hell;
and being doomed to obedience, there's no will 
to compromise, any disorder is harshly punished
by a thousand lashes that make the flesh bleed!

My Marigolds Stink

My Marigolds stink
yes, you heard me,
if I accidentally touch them
they smell like skunk pee.

I can't stand being near them
'cause they stink so darn bad,
these are the stinkiest flowers
I think I have ever had.

Sure, they look nice and all
bloom out quite nice,
but I think their stink
would scare off pesky mice.

The bees don't go near them
keep themselves far away,
I have to plug my nose
to keep the overwhelming stink at bay.

I keep them well watered
as I often do,
but their aroma will make your eyes water
you'll plug your quickly and say, "P U."

Copyright Cynthia Jones
May.4/2015

I'm pretty sure this is a warning to wildlife. It's as if they're screaming out,   "HEY, DON'T YOU DARE TOUCH ME!! I WILL MAKE YOU REGRET IT!! I STINK!! BACK OFF!!!" I'm probably right about this...it's a protective mechanism, to ward off predators.

For the Maggot's Fun

Often times when we glance at the mirror
Staring through its lens in powdered face.
We marvel, we wonder and ponder
Over the physical flesh.

O! Do you sometimes cry
Wishing you were carved from the finest of marble,
Or you smile when showers of compliment flood your being?

If only beauty was an antidote to death,
What would have been the faith of an ugly lass who walked the street?

So we eat to keep fit
And swallow pints of pill
To keep the body,
And care not of the withering soul.

If only the sight of a man's muscle
Who has made a home of the gym could scare off death
What would have become of a man who is as lean as a broom?

So here I sit
In this dark night
Staring at the candle light,
Listening to my thumping heart
Linking mortality to futility.

I can only reach you through words
I can only implore your mind
To trace back its step to reality.
All the clamouring,
And all the grumbling
Of being ugly or beautiful
Bothers not the treacherous death.

When the body remains still
And there seems to be no air in your lung's fill,
Then you realise that this body is meant for the maggot's fun,
When interred to mother earth.

Premium Member Celtic Hallows

Near our late year approach,  A Celtic feast and festivities, around a wood blaze Hoge. On the first of the eleventh month, wine and beer by the barrel is sunk, and merrily a few of many will start their new year drunk.

Cloaked attire to scare off and warn, unwanted spirits of all shapes or form.
Children's songs they sing in rhyme, All Hallows Eve! do they shriek out and cry.

Markings drawn door to door, Candlesticks and spooky shrines.
what began as once a feared holiday
now for so many a celebratory time.

Hand's and Thousand Voices

under the cloud
when the rain and their smoke living
chance love surronderity behind 
any life... any stories to take hiring 
at the grand canyon 
summer night with star light
our desperated beginning
only life will be appart
by sort time
or only long term window of world
in the night not a game
i suppose take care the other blood
thank's to be god
thank's to be our land
always warning by they are claws
give the winning without reasons
because a scare off to you
because the air is gone
we need the land to be life
together with emerald and you.....
the reason to maked a life


Pandu_Widianto

Border Crossings

We’ve got a border to secure
To keep bad folks out I’m sure
But a fence it must endure repeated breechings
And every him and her
In Congress with a cure
Says our plans are immature and keep on screeching

A 10 foot fence is no deterrent
Sixteen’s the thinking current
But bring a ladder and that’s all she wrote
So maybe alligators
Water too high for hip-waders
We’re thinking maybe we should build a moat

So let’s just build the fence in pairs
In between we’ll stuff with bears
Who’ll scare off most and eat up all the rest
And electrify the wire
Turn the power each day higher
Survival of the fittest at its best

So what’s each mile going to cost?
The calculations all been lost
But they say they’re going to figure out the bill
It started out at three
But grew from there you see
The latest number’s something like 6 Mil

And 6 million for each mile
Will add up after while
I mean the border’s 700 miles long
But that’s just the Southern fence line
We’ve a North one to build in kind
Can’t we see that something has gone wrong?

Just what are we protecting?
What lose are we projecting
And every day the cost just seems to double
No matter what we do or say
They’ll get across them anyway
Why should we even go to all this trouble?

Wait

The realisation that this violent red came up in me, that it had put
itself out there, against a peaceful blue

hidden underneath my skin I thought, but once this disconnection
came up, an unsafety, the red escaped

and in an instant, alien became less distant, fluid in my daily
countenance. How I’ve always assumed you

were the rock and I the water, how it turned out to be all the same.
Me fully capable of standing on stones

in the fluidity of waves, in this distractive life. And even while 
I peak over the cliff edge, with the wind

in my face, drawn into depth & distance - I know the cracks of then
and the hills of now will become a passage,

a progress, through the fragments I breathe, for the joy I feel. You
went along with a trust to my inner world while

you wouldn’t anyway. So I decided to wend my place, to dream up
a furnishing and survive nonetheless. Once

your heart has jumped out of your body, the rivers & tides will
smooth over. Structured daydreaming will 

bring out the bright, fresh morning I need, to scare off the ghosts of 
my lost night, a subverted realism to coast through

a clear consciousness over the guilt and some uneasy providence. What's
done, is done. True. Time well spent.

Birds

Birds can glide high above the sky,
They see everything and can see through a lie
They can go up up and high,
And can always go faster than a fly.

Birds nest where predators can’t rest,
Fight in groups to scare off the best
Feed their children and keep from stress
Then migrate together, flying far far west.

Us humans cannot fly in the wind,
Cannot see through everything as if blind
We cannot see the sunrise shine
And cannot fight or fly whilst inter-twined.

I wish I could fly, high above the sky
See through every single lie
And fly left, right, down, and up high
And perhaps even faster than a fly.

Maybe even nest and get easy rest,
And cooperate together and become the best
To keep children from starving and stress
And go on vacation together, perhaps go west.

I wish I was a bird, and could escape this artificial world
Fly high away and explore the unfurled
Leave everything behind for a world uncurled
Hoping one day this story will become my new world.
© Kodii AK  Create an image from this poem.

Get a Premium Membership
Get more exposure for your poetry and more features with a Premium Membership.
Book: Reflection on the Important Things

Member Area

My Admin
Profile and Settings
Edit My Poems
Edit My Quotes
Edit My Short Stories
Edit My Articles
My Comments Inboxes
My Comments Outboxes
Soup Mail
Poetry Contests
Contest Results/Status
Followers
Poems of Poets I Follow
Friend Builder

Soup Social

Poetry Forum
New/Upcoming Features
The Wall
Soup Facebook Page
Who is Online
Link to Us

Member Poems

Poems - Top 100 New
Poems - Top 100 All-Time
Poems - Best
Poems - by Topic
Poems - New (All)
Poems - New (PM)
Poems - New by Poet
Poems - Read
Poems - Unread

Member Poets

Poets - Best New
Poets - New
Poets - Top 100 Most Poems
Poets - Top 100 Most Poems Recent
Poets - Top 100 Community
Poets - Top 100 Contest

Famous Poems

Famous Poems - African American
Famous Poems - Best
Famous Poems - Classical
Famous Poems - English
Famous Poems - Haiku
Famous Poems - Love
Famous Poems - Short
Famous Poems - Top 100

Famous Poets

Famous Poets - Living
Famous Poets - Most Popular
Famous Poets - Top 100
Famous Poets - Best
Famous Poets - Women
Famous Poets - African American
Famous Poets - Beat
Famous Poets - Cinquain
Famous Poets - Classical
Famous Poets - English
Famous Poets - Haiku
Famous Poets - Hindi
Famous Poets - Jewish
Famous Poets - Love
Famous Poets - Metaphysical
Famous Poets - Modern
Famous Poets - Punjabi
Famous Poets - Romantic
Famous Poets - Spanish
Famous Poets - Suicidal
Famous Poets - Urdu
Famous Poets - War

Poetry Resources

Anagrams
Bible
Book Store
Character Counter
Cliché Finder
Poetry Clichés
Common Words
Copyright Information
Grammar
Grammar Checker
Homonym
Homophones
How to Write a Poem
Lyrics
Love Poem Generator
New Poetic Forms
Plagiarism Checker
Poetry Art
Publishing
Random Word Generator
Spell Checker
What is Good Poetry?
Word Counter