Best Plans Poems
I’m the prince with calloused palms
up at dawn with stifled yawns; pulling on boots
feeding pigs and herding cows - stuck in mud, it’s raining now
and as I plough, I dream of life... not on a farm
of white walled castles crowned in gold (like the tales told of old)
where beautiful princesses dance and laugh
(with roaring fires in their hearths) blowing kisses at princes
brave and bold - none of them shivering, miserably cold
but dreams are dreams, and so I plough
heir to acres; fit and well (and down in the village, there is this girl)
I have no castle, but I’ll ask for her hand
in time, a son, and new prince of this land
(SOMEWHERE IN FRANCE 1917)
It’s just another starry night
all is at peace before the storm,
Yet so afraid am I, of the impending summer’s day
now the shadows begin to form.
Many silhouettes create memories
those in childhood verdant pastures aspire,
yet amongst this valley of planted souls
gives one many reasons to suspire.
I see a subtle portrait of mankind
an apparition suspended from the sky,
in waves of committed butchery
to fill one’s saddened eye.
Are they not also human?
those that dance between the lead,
like me, have they a reason to love
those that advance amongst the dead.
Yet still they come uninvited
like the surf on an inhibited beach,
same God! Same belief!
Our ascendancy, our spirit to breach!
Yet still, I keep on making plans for the morrow
my love I know soon to be all alone.
Oh! How I wish my finger tips to touch her face,
before one rescinds this life, this birthright loan!
© Harry J Horsman 2007
Daddy won't let that man get away.
He did the dirty deed; now the man must pay.
In a very short time, the man will be a groom.
If not, he will be facing certain doom.
Daddy will make sure the man marries the little girl.
Daddy has a shotgun, and he will pick him off like a squirrel.
Inspired by another member's poem.
In the up's that I have found
With the in's that help me out
Here and there and there about
There's only so much that I'm allowed
In the all that I can keep
That keeps on affecting me
Will take for granted in its deeds
Where no longer will I be free
For what looks good at the time
Sometimes comes back to bite
If you don't keep a watchful eye
And you let it run your life
For what's good can turn out bad
If you give it the upper hand
What started out as well laid plans
Becomes more of a demand
So be careful in what you do
Give all of your time to
Like you've heard and it is true
Can take a bite out of you
Vance Plans a Vasectomy
By Elton Camp
Vance heard a vasectomy was the way to go
He didn’t know a lot about it, though
But had read all that he wanted to see:
That no more children is the guarantee
In the waiting area he had to have a seat
Since the doctor was having a bite to eat
The doc sat on a table just out of sight
Of a hot dog he was about to take a bite
But he clenched the bun a bit too tight
The wiener then shot out of his sight
In the waiting area, it dropped to the floor
From Vance there was heard a startled roar
“I didn’t understand what this was about!”
Vance said as he jumped up and ran out
I want so much to see and feel
Everything I can indulge
Nature, sounds, sights around me
Food to taste and enjoy
Live fully doing all
That is possible
Then I will feel
Completed
My job
Done.
Let's not saunter to Saturn this evening
Or amble across to the moon
If we ramble up there in a rocket
We won't get there any time soon
I'd rather we didn't dawdle to Denmark
Or dilly-dally our way to Des Moines
That's far too slow and specific
You can ask - I'm not likely to join
You might suggest a jaunt to Jamaica
Or a stroll down the streets of Shanghai
Or even a schlep to the shops, my dear
But there are other things I'd like to try
We could mosey on a mission to Miami
Set our sights and percolate to Peru
Or meander to Mexico City
Where we're sure to find something to do
Why wander without any purpose?
Why sprint to a rendezvous or a meet?
What a waste of energy and motion
It'll ruin your heart and your feet!
But to coddiwomple to the Canaries
Where there's always a nice summer breeze
Is my idea of perfection
Can we go there tonight… can we... please?!
trap sprung, mouse missing
a Christmas gift left behind
spinning a grey tail
Brian Johnston
December 6, 2015
It pays to be prepared for possibilities
None of us know what the future brings
Some of us may face unwanted setbacks
Before the proverbial "fat lady sings."
Things we never could've imagined
Unforeseen illness, a sudden accident
Things happen that we least expect,
Things happen that seem never meant.
Preparation for the unexpected can soften
The hurtful impact of a knockout blow
And, if we have made contingency plans
We have a pre-planned direction to go.
Written October 13, 2021
My sisters were coming for a visit for the very first time,
Heading to New Hampshire, leaving the Georgia heat behind.
Our friend Charlie was a house guest before they arrived.
My husband, Charlie, and I all hatched a plan brilliantly contrived.
We decided to impress my lovely sisters, and hired a limousine,
To greet them with champagne, and treat them like queens!
The surprise was going as planned as we met them at the gate.
Barbara and Lisa were unaware of the limo that did await.
However, the surprise was on us as we got to the limousine.
The hood was up, and it was the saddest sight we had ever seen.
My sister Barbara said, “Those poor people are broken down.”
We were chagrined, and could have crawled in the first hole around.
We had to admit that limo was our broken-down ride.
Their hysterical laughter then eased our bruised pride.
My eighty-year-old father-in-law gave instructions to the driver,
While we were hoping the chauffeur was another MacGyver.
Eventually we were in luck, and we were homeward bound.
We broke out the champagne, and the laughter was profound.
The driver is the one that made out like a bandit.
My husband, Charlie, and father-in-law all tipped him in private.
6/6/17
COMPARE TOP TERM PLANS IN JUST 60 SEC!
I am the soul of all the Grecian Gods you have revered and penned
I know no matter what happens to you, you will come back to us in all ardency
The gods always test their worshippers, you know that, don't you?
You have made your home the temple of Jupiter. Very appreciative!
Now, move out of your blessed walls for a sterling holiday to Mount Olympus
You can't import an ancient religion into a completely different environment!
The whole point of it is that you keep your gods sweet and generous
- you scratch our backs, we will scratch yours to your hearts content!
High time you realised we establish a quid pro quo relationship
You have dared to make us only simple offerings of flowers, candles, incense sticks
Do you think titanic strengths can survive on such fancy stuff?
We the Greek Gods have a solemn protocol to suit our palates
You who have only slaughtered vegetables on your chopping board
Will watch and learn ritual sacrifice at the altar outside the temple
And then with your magic fingers in a jiffy overload our feasting tables
With an assorted array of the worlds best meaty cuisine and wine!
How could you just foolishly forget our hard taught lesson-
The way into hearts of the gods is through their stomachs?
The gods betray their anger that you have never ever attended their Summer Solstice
We the Greek Gods love romance, music, dance, sweet whispers on moonlit nights
Have you ever taken our breath away with a mesmerising song and sensual dance?
Come and beguile us in your skimpily robed flowers at Mount Olympus festival
Age is no barrier if you oblige to dance on a moonlit night,
Sybil won her youth from Apollo, you see? Why lose yours?
Compare our top term plans in 60 seconds-our final barter system with conditions-
We fulfil your desire for the topmost slot in your simmering soup contest!
You scratch our back, we scratch and scratch and scratch your fragrant flowery back!!
THE BEST DEAL! GOOD! THE DEAL IS FINAL!!
October28, 2015
Contest:Any poem#34 Contest
Sponsor: Poet Destroyer A
(Earlier contest
Oct. 9, 2015
Competition: You Want It Bad -Then Bribe Me
Sponsor: Casarah Nance)
O’ no, the Washington swamp media rails
and the hypocrites are all telling tall tales.
A war plan group chat
on an unsecured app
but how soon they forget Hillary’s emails!
Fly boys were good to go in their cockpit
and the Houthi strike targets were all hit.
A successful mission plan
unlike Joe’s Afghanistan
so those filled with outrage are full of sh*t!
Written: March 2025
A flawless ceremony,
and elegant reception,
followed by long honeymoon
delayed by snowfall.
For John Freeman's love /humor contest Won 2nd place
I know just what I need to get my life on track.
I just need to find the right guy to give some love,
Then somehow, maybe, I can get my smile back.
Sometimes I get lonely and I feel the knack.
I just want to be permanently attached like a beautiful dove!
I know just what I need to get my life on track.
I will put my heart up on the for sale rack,
Maybe that will give my personality a little shove.
Then somehow, maybe, I can get my smile back.
Whenever I’m rejected, I consider what I lack.
Or maybe he just wasn’t sent from heaven above.
I know just what I need. To get my life on track!
Sometimes I even wonder, will his name be Jack?
Will he be suffocating, like I’m smothered by a glove?
Then, somehow, maybe, I can get my smile back.
But maybe I should find another life hack.
Something I could actually be proud of.
I know just what I need. To get my life on track.
Then somehow, maybe, I can get my smile back.
It's temporary,
My plans aren't restricted by,
Hair nets and clock ins.
I'm right on schedule,
I'll be ready to retire,
In a few more years.