Best Paired Up Poems
Who first thought to eat cornbread with chili?
And who first thought to add ketchup to fries -
Who first thought to put that bell in Philly -
And who first thought that yeast could make bread rise?
Who first coupled Abbott with Costello -
And who knew whiskers looked so good on codgers -
Who first added fruit to cherry Jell-O
And who first paired up Hammerstein with Rodgers?
Who first peanut butter'd up some jelly -
And who first thought to eat breakfast in bed -
Who made that first Reuben in their deli -
And who suggested Ginger dance with Fred?
Who first thought that tea could use some honey -
Who first put together nails and wood?
Fine folks - all; and yes, it may seem funny
But I should like to meet them if I could.
Now who first put the moon and stars together -
Who put lush green hills under blue skies -
Who made sunshine follow rainy weather -
And who first fashioned beauty for our eyes?
The same One who brought you into my life,
He knew we'd be just right for one another
He knew that we would be husband and wife
Before He formed each of us in our mother.
Great is the One who makes one out of two
Preserving them through sickness, joys, and tears
He knew that you'd need me and I'd need you
I thank Him for our many happy years.
// Dedicated to my beloved bride on our 27th anniversary in 2011 //
Sir Homophone came to meet the maid that somehow stayed so slim.
Her feat was to stay chaste to him and yet by his feet be chased by him.
She had recently lost some weight by refusing to partake in evening sup.
It seemed the more that she pared down the more likely to be paired up.
All night the weak maid prayed so meekly for the Knight that she sees.
But the Knight preyed to be made thrice weekly and she at night to seize.
She hoped he would meet and see her and then choose to wed,
But it was the supper meat that saw the sear that he chews instead.
She sewed her dress then pared the wood and the holy altar made,
He sowed distress when he prepared his wood to wholly alter the maid.
“Maid please tend to me now you’ve said you weekly have sordid sex.”
“Knight please you misunderstand I said I weakly have sorted sox.”
She begged, “Please be discreet with what it is that we’ve discussed.”
He shrugged, “You are awfully discrete in what it is that you disgust.”
But love conspired to steal, his heart soared and they were off to wed,
Then lust transpired to steel his hard sword and they were off to bed.
He was happy because of her sighs and she was happy because of his.
This concludes my good Knight tale and all of this good night tail biz.
You read it didn’t you? Shame on you, I had to read it because I wrote it
but you had a choice. Benny Hill would be so proud.
I am a blue sock.
I'm the bluest sock there ever was.
There never was a bluer sock, because
I lost my loving partner by the lint-screen fuzz.
We worked together as a pair.
We lived a life of quiet pride.
We'd protect those two feet - me and
My hundred percent cotton bride.
Did this life of duty bore her?
Or make her want to play with fire?
She followed her desire - and so,
After work we went into the dryer.
She danced and played, rolled and tumbled
With so many other socks that day.
Then she paired up with another,
Leaving me to forever say...
I am a blue sock.
I'm the bluest sock there ever was.
There never was a bluer sock, because
I lost my loving partner by the lint-screen fuzz.
dunnocks and robins
paired up and nesting
winter moths active
She Won't Let Me Go
She won't let me go to church choir practice;
Sound like that I'm sitting on a thorny cactus,
And every time when I will moan and groan
She wants to leave me at home all alone.
She sings great paired up with Bob the tenor
Who is thinner and never has been a sinner;
God, mellow both of their voices did make,
Mine, windows and whole world would shake.
For crying out loud my voice became so bad
While singing had started a brand new fad;
If you could buy me one more case of beer
My deadly voice into space does disappear.
So you know what my new motto now may be;
When you buy beer and give it out for free
For me will be beginning of a new career;
Have no fear Horn is here with more beer.
James Thesarious Hilarious Horn
www.poetrysoup.com
PS. And now this final situation I have to face;
Intended on sending another in the first place,
And category of sick according to latest skinny
Is what to people this probably may be to many.
PSS. I will be reading this poem at next Poetry
Revisited Poetry Recital on 2d week of the month
at Arbor Landing in Shallotte, NC. When I do, I
am going to have everyone stand up and hold
their hands on their sides to support all of the
laughing they are gonna be doing. Jim Horn
solo
i don’t know the words
the bird sings
they land gently
on my ears
paired up
with the wind chime
circulation
wide open doors -
full-out chill Spring
5/7/2022
Angel of Mine
I knew I’d soon go places
my life had never known
a land of battles, snags and snares
things I would not condone
I knew that I would soon become
her biggest enemy
I couldn't let that stop me now
‘cause life was calling me
calling from a distance
a place we’d all once been
but none of us have memories
of times before we sinned
I’d always been very well protected
with bubble over head
but with no bubble o’er me now
these visits I would dread
for she dabbled in a world
so treacherous and seedy
that losing some or all of me
held great possibility
I was honest and up front
for I knew I had to be
for as much as I had checked her out
she too was checking me
we were guided by her heart
and I followed my own
an unlikely pair to be paired up
prior to this unknown
polar opposites at best
and opposites attract
the journey was destined to be long and hard
but we were now attached
mine was an awful foolhardy addiction
I was lost to even myself
she was the carrier of my drug
I’d put caution on the shelf
I felt that I was losing
my fears were for us all
but God’s grace was upon me
and He wouldn't let me fall
days and weeks and months went by
and when late June rolled ‘round
I gathered up my frazzled nerves
and dressed in that green gown
the doctor walked into the room
and things took off real fast
when he handed that angel over to me
I said “thank God, at last”
her APGAR score was perfect
no problems there to bare
I’d be taking my angel home real soon
oh yes, this life IS fair
by Rochelle Harris
We were paired up by Teen Town
A TV show from Des Moines
Nancy and Ed were there, our idols
They had us all line up.
No one thought about height.
They lined the boys on one side
The girls on the other
I was in seventh grade.
My sister got a nice short guy
I got the tallest boy ever born
Worst time ever
I was staring at his belt buckle
Frankly I do not know
Which one of us
Was the most horrified
Written March 14, 2020
Contest: Dance with Me
Sponsor: Kim Rodriguez
Now Children the pink and purple pails are for the girls, blue and green for the boys
We are going berry picking down by the stone wall Mr. Bethel said we could pick his berries
too
The stone wall off limits to the Webb household, Bobby, Joe and Jim had the scars to prove it
Oh, “MOM“, (coil in fear, no crop) Thank-you What did Millie say; Are we going to make pies?
Ma’am didn’t know sign language, of course we will tell her she can wear the number 2 apron
Dotty, George, and I started running to the end of our property Slow down They’re
excited “Mom”
I know Alice listen you older kids will be paired up with the younger ones: Alice, George and
Harry
Virginia, William and Dorothy; Joe Jim and Robert; Rebecca you’re the best signer, You and
Mildred
Alice, yes Harry why did Ma’am say we could call her “MOM” my voice shakes when I say
Mom
I think all of us feel that way; but make hay while the sun shines, What? Just let her be
MOM today
Pick them ,don’t eat them Wow, Al ,that’s what Becky just said to Millie look Millie said they’re
so sweet
You can read that from over here Yep Millie and Becky have been teaching me. You know
what this means
Easy: I Love you too Where is George? Over there George your not suppose to be on that
side of the wall
It’s sprinkling , my pails almost full come on George let’s go back to “Mom” Alice go get the
other children
This is the first time since I’ve been here that we were all together, laughing and talking
while Mom smiled
As we got to the steps of the porch the sky opened sheets of rain a bolt of lighting , a sonic
boom of thunder
The spring-cleaning long ago, was a family affair.
Mama and her two daughters could not do it on their own.
When Daddy helped he always did a lot more than his share,
And if he were too busy he had a hired hand to loan.
The big wool rugs were heavy; they could make a strong man groan.
The outside windows must be washed, that was my brothers’ work.
The job was done on Saturday when they were home from school.
There were four of them, they paired up, so none of them could shirk.
One of them climbed, the other held the ladder or the stool.
“Do it right or do it over” was Mama’s enforced rule.
Everybody helped to get the big rugs across the line
And a big pole was inserted to lift them off the ground.
After Mama inspected, if she said the lift was fine,
Each one of us took a board and we gave those rugs a pound.
In between our other jobs we would go another round.
After emptying the straw ticks and putting in new straw,
Both we girls helped our mama scrub all of the wooden floors.
New linoleum for kitchen floor was laid down by our pa.
My brothers Kalsomined the walls and painted all the doors.
For our pay, Mom opened canned fruit from winter’s dwindling stores.
By: Joyce Johnson 3/05/12
For Francine's contest "Cobwebs and Dust. My theme: "Spring Cleaning"
Do you want?
NO!
A puppy?
YES!
Do you want to
NO!
Go to your friend Susan's?
Yes, I guess I do.
Do you want
NO
Living with me is really fun.
You can ask your husband.
He calls me his 9-year-old boy.
My first answer is always no.
I have a bit of an excuse.
It was 1973; I was taking an assertiveness training class.
the other women were skittish when paired up with me
until the instructor admitted that I'm on probation now,
and none of the ones I had flung, kicked, or smacked had been hurt, really badly.
Saying no was big in my family
of origin who perpetually used it, and you had
better supply excuses like crazy too.
I had to stand in front of a
mirror and practice that
up to two hours a day,
so I could get some of my
"me" time back.
I have it pat now, folks.
A magic unicorn came to visit on a Tuesday.
She was pretty but alas a smoker.
She came up behind us as we were
thnk-talking via telepathy and stuff.
said you are supposed to
be enjoying your fire-truck car, and your bubble machine.
And "throwing a ball in the house," I screamed with pure delight, feeling a beach, without any mean.
We really truly souly need less lessons and more play for thee,
I tell this gravelly-voiced unicorn. Man, his eyes are a pretty blue!
So from now on this is how it has to be:
Do you want?
NO!
A fire truck?
Hell,yes,please!
My me time is back
in full, happy, excited force.
I have it pat now, folks.
Let's go shopping!
Eleven children run toward the car,
which is curious as I only have 10 grandchildren.
I now can hear the robins sing, thankfully it's almost spring. The ducks that camped here in the snow are very few now, where'd they go? I'm always consistent with their feeding but very few now are actually eating. The mallards that come are very sparse, the cardinals and squirrels eat the seeds that I toss. If on occasion I spot a duck, it appears that these mallards are all paired up. Oh yes, of course, it's almost spring. There busy now doing that other duck thing.
Neil is a para-cyclist who has often paired up with,
One of two people, either Sarah Storey’s husband,
Or Craig MacLean to pedal to gold, it’s his smith,
Having been a track sprinter, built up his hand.
Barney Storey has Type 1 diabetes from childhood,
And the pair took gold in the World Championships,
In 2009, both in the kilo and the sprint, both good,
At the kilo where they set a new WR, took strips.
Then in 2011 in the Italian Para-Cycling Track Worlds,
Him and Craig won gold in both events, new WR,
Then in LA with Barney again he won silver cords,
And in London they won gold with another new WR.
In 2014 Neil teamed up with Pete Mitchell in Mexico,
Where they won gold in the 1 km tandem time trial,
But he reunited with Craig for the games in Glasgow,
Where they won gold for sprint and time trial, double.
Neil is an MBE from 2013 and comes from Aberdeen,
Was born with an eye condition, retinitis pigmentosa,
He studied physics at the University of Aberdeen, lean,
And was born on the 12th of March in 1984, a goer.
It's six o'clock in the morning,
And the sky is just turning light.
It's slightly overcast today,
But soon it will be bright.
The Canada Geese are returning.
They've paired up and picked their mates.
They're looking about and searching now,
To find a good hiding place,
Where they will build a fine new nest,
And raise a healthy brood,
Where they will be safe from predators,
And there is lots of food.
The sheep in the fields are lambing.
The cows are giving birth.
It's such a lovely time of year,
When God renews the earth.
we know....
"Teddies don't hug back,but sometimes they are all you've got".
"Journeys of thousand miles starts from a single step without a stop".
It was really a painful moment when i think about that moment,
When i wake up some morning,
and i did'nt see you anywhere.
And suddenly i realized,it was a dream,
you are with someone else,as you were very keen.
I can't see you,paired up with someone else,
I love you and i guess that was'nt enough.
Everyone asks me to forget you,but i know its very tough.
There is addiction in everything that God has made,
One of the God's creation is you,
with whom i want to start my life as fresh and new.
Why loyalty is not paid back with loyalty,
my heart was like a sparking and a scintillating star,
that suddenly shattered,
All should grab every oppurtunities,
coz' the path is very torn and tattered.
If you have started the journey,
all you can do is walk through the path.
There will be moments you will cherish,
and sometimes you will find tears along with cheers.