Best Olay Poems

Hungry in France

Garçon, garçon
bring hot soupçon 
bouillabaisse accent egu. 
Qu'est-ce que c’est, qu’est-ce que c’est?  
Sounds like I’m un peu coucou.

Sacrebleu, Sacrebleu 
what can...

Read more of this work...

Oh the joys of an airport trolley
I try and push it oh what a folly
The wheels always have a life of their own
I’ve not got...

Read more of this work...

At the first piece of twilight 
the night's fleece goes astray.
Nebulous clusters of unwhite 
destines into mass decay.
And to the chorus of birds on height:
Welcome,...

Read more of this work...

Long, slim, chocolate, and divine
Most men, and even some women pine... feign over this birthday suit of mine
Smooth layers with no assistance from oil of...

Read more of this work...

hey man, your words smell like tuna fish
your rhymes are ludicrous
and I have a wish
you on vacation would be my bliss
your shirt is wearing spagetti
did...

Read more of this work...

A well-groomed matador José
Liked to moisturize with Oil of Olay
His hands lost their grip
The cape it did slip
He was gored as he cried out "¡Olé!"...

Read more of this work...

Inspired by and sung to "The Whip It" tune by Devo.

CRACK that old age whip
Give it a pink slip,
Step on an elliptical,
Old age shouldn't have...

Read more of this work...

Year after year I am deeply depressed,
I'm highly educated and I'm well dressed.
I live from highest peak to another peak,
Celebrate them every time with chick...

Read more of this work...

There’s a chemical factory upon my face
I have lines and spots I need to erase
I mix elixirs and daily apply
The aging process I cannot deny

I...

Read more of this work...

in a praved courtyard
                     ...

Read more of this work...

A lithe performer with Cirque d’Soliel
First much oiled herself with Oil of Olay,
Then practiced her intense high wire plie
While clad only in a grand floral...

Read more of this work...

What that woman needs:
 a top, 
spinning, 
without a mons seat center-
goddess ,no one knows- 
he him , 
hiker]make flared nostril breeze 
in some [how?!]...

Read more of this work...

Don't know if “delicious” can describe today
Another I can think of is perhaps “yee-haw, olay!”
Ye ole sun's shining brightly
I tip my hat politely
Sounds like I'm...

Read more of this work...

Our family is all about smells.
When Old Spice clogs our senses
My father is visiting.
Sometimes I get a glimpse of him too,
Out of the corner of...

Read more of this work...

At night I slather on my face
An anti-wrinkle cream
So it can make me youthful
While I toss and turn and dream.

Of course it doesn't work and...

Read more of this work...