Best Mortified Poems

You wake up to commotion, throw on some clothes.
Outside you see some bloody bodies piled on the street.
People are screaming, running in all directions
away from...

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Oops, It was an Accident

I accidentally let one loose
on a blind date with a guy named Bruce.
We went to the movies on that fateful day
happily...

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Old John's birthday was approaching, he'd be seventy two
And his family asked him nicely what he'd like to  do
"Do you fancy a nice picnic...

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A rose named Brighton 
For your funeral flowers
A stunning golden yellow hue
The place you were born Son
But now sadly gone Son
This yellow rose so...

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1981, the Royal Wedding
     Charles and Di, sweethearts of the world
     ‘Til the Queen of Hearts’ hopes...

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Once upon a time there lived a dancer 
Shyama, a concubine of a feudal baron
Had a pretty girl Kanha, also a dancer
Quite excelled in playing...

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SAD Seasonally Affective Disorder

Some are prone to depression in winter when days get shorter when
less light enters the brain through the eyes and thoughts become...

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Self-Esteem destroyed; lost and never found
Engaged in unwanted advances; horror all around 
X-Rated is the actions; the pain is something unable to forget
United are the...

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SHAME
contempt
misfortune

his pride mortified
by a venomous tongue
dripping spiteful jealousy

“the fury of a woman scorned”

- - - - - - - - - - - - -...

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He promised me i would not die
As I’d been forced to live
He promised me I would not cry
And his heart he would give

And now its...

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Dumbstruck Is Me (a rhyming, acrostic kind of thing)


Discombobulated, how apt the word
Utterly gobsmacked by the absurd 
Mind numbingly mortified at the nonsensical 
By waking...

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when the evening  wind dies
upon the mountain top,
when cold silence chills the night with her tongue,
when the shadows bid the forest be still;
i will...

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His habit to put his socks on first
Started these shenanigans one day
After a shower, he donned said socks
With one sagging in a nagging way

He should...

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Hot. Hot. Hot.
It’s so hot out here,
I’m taking off all me clothes.
Gonna connect it to the tap
And got under a cold hose.
I jiggle my bits...

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If you are always young and youthful
Are you really being honest and truthful?
Or was the way you wish you had been
Looking so pretty, nice and...

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