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Oops, It Was An Accident

Oops, It was an Accident

I accidentally let one loose
on a blind date with a guy named Bruce.
We went to the movies on that fateful day
happily carrying our snacks on a tray.
We settled down in our comfy seat
all ready to enjoy this special treat.
Things were proceeding oh so well
with popcorn, hot dogs, banana split with caramel,
when suddenly my stomach began to rumble,
and to my dismay, gurgle and grumble.
In fear, I felt the gases build up
like a once dormant volcano about to erupt.
Then helplessly, I had to just let it loose;
oh my gracious, the stench was profuse!
Mortified I wanted to drop to my knee,
but played possum so none would suspect it was me.

People started shouting such gross obscenities,
and hollering out unmentionable profanities.
One voice declared that something had died;
another indignantly wanted the stinker identified.
Someone suggested the skunk should be drowned;
I wanted to flee, but I dared not turn around. 
So quietly I sat unknown in the dark cinema,
as poor Bruce wondered aloud if someone had been given an enema.
My heart boomed forth just like a doom-drum,
I prayed no other foul odor would escape my guilty bum.
But like a clan of skunks, it lingered and stunk,
I was so afraid folks would figure out who’d made that funk.
Thankfully I was saved from public disgrace
as ushers armed with spray cans fogged up that whole place.
Gratefully I sighed, relieved that my crime
had not been traced back to me by show time!

07-09-2018

Contest:     I Accidentally Let One Loose
Sponsor:    Charles Messina
Placement: 1st

Copyright © | Year Posted 2018




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Date: 6/18/2019 3:32:00 PM
wow, THAT would be HORRIBLE. I sure hope this is all fiction. GREAT write I finally am seeing and Big congrats on the trophy win it garnered for you.
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Pandita Sanchez
Date: 6/18/2019 4:03:00 PM
Thanks, Andie! This is absolutely all fiction - lol! But I had the greatest fun putting it together! And I must say that while I'm not not really good at writing humor, this turned out to be my most humorous piece! Love and hugs. Pandita
Date: 11/7/2018 12:13:00 PM
Hi Pandita... nice to see you've been very productive, whilst I've been away from the 'Soup. This is hilarious and a well-deserved win!! All the best, John.
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Pandita Sanchez
Date: 11/7/2018 1:09:00 PM
Welcome back, dear friend! Many thanks for your wonderful compliments and support! I am so happy you enjoyed this piece! Hugs to you and hope you are enjoying a beautiful day. Pandita
Date: 9/7/2018 8:06:00 AM
Ha ha, this is so good, congrats on your win!
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Pandita Sanchez
Date: 9/7/2018 9:38:00 AM
Hi Richard, thank you for stopping by and I'm happy you liked this poem! Have a good day, my friend! Best regards. Pandita
Date: 8/5/2018 10:43:00 AM
my mom would alwsy tell me a story that she had a brother that would do it in a bus then he would in a loud voice acuse everyone sayingf thign reaL LOUD LIKE no respect! YOU SEE GIRLS ARE SUPOSE TO HOLD IT IN
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Pandita Sanchez
Date: 8/6/2018 1:04:00 PM
Hahahaha - that is so hilarious! Thank you, my friend, for giving me a good laugh and for your support and encouragement! Hugs. Pandita
Date: 8/3/2018 12:11:00 PM
This is hilarious, Pandita. Congrats on your trophy win.
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Pandita Sanchez
Date: 8/3/2018 1:04:00 PM
Hi Dale, I am so glad this piece made you laugh! Thank you so very much, my friend for your lovely congratulatory words! Have a great weekend! Pandita
Date: 7/28/2018 12:10:00 PM
Oh my goodness ... so funny as all outdoors, Pandita. I could not stop laughing. Your witty humor is over-the-top rad albedo (geek astrophysics jargon.) Meaning: Your poetry reflects pure light,(thought illumination) allowing us (the reader) to absorb pure knowledge. Yeah, I love you too. lol! Great satire poetry, my dear friend. Love and joy always.
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Pandita Sanchez
Date: 7/28/2018 7:33:00 PM
My dear Freddie, I am absolutely delighted that you got a good laugh from reading this one! Thank you so much for your beautiful compliments that brightened my Saturday evening! Hope you are enjoying a lovely weekend! Love and hugs. Pandita
Date: 7/26/2018 7:53:00 AM
I love your sense of humor, Pandita. I see congratulations are in order. As we used to always say, why fart and waste it when you can burp and taste it:) very funny write!
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Pandita Sanchez
Date: 7/26/2018 9:12:00 AM
Hahahaha, Daniel, I love your humorous comment - made me laugh out loud! And thank you for your lovely compliments! Love and hugs. Pandita
Date: 7/23/2018 5:03:00 AM
WoW!...Pandita, you have a way with words and wind...they can make a movie lol...congrats on your top spot my friend...just let me know ahead of time where you go next lol...love & wind...^WW^
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Pandita Sanchez
Date: 7/23/2018 2:54:00 PM
Hehehehe - I will be sure to warn you ahead of time- LOL! Thank you WW for your wonderful congratulatory words! Love and hugs. Pandita
Date: 7/23/2018 2:44:00 AM
Great write. what happened to Bruce?
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Pandita Sanchez
Date: 7/23/2018 11:02:00 AM
Hahaha - Sir Bruce never went back to that cinema again:-)LOL! Thank you Kai for your kind compliments! Best regards and hugs. Pandita
Date: 7/22/2018 6:43:00 PM
Lol! Oh my word! You have me laughing still. Congratulations on your #1 win. So funny!
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Pandita Sanchez
Date: 7/23/2018 3:35:00 PM
Many thanks, dear Susan, for your wonderful compliments and support! I am so happy you enjoyed this piece! Hugs to you and hope you are enjoying the day. Pandita
Date: 7/22/2018 2:07:00 PM
This is hilarious, Pandita, congrats on your well deserved win. John
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Pandita Sanchez
Date: 7/23/2018 3:17:00 PM
Hi John, thank you for stopping by and I'm happy you liked this poem! Have a good day, my friend! Best regards. Pandita
Date: 7/22/2018 12:22:00 PM
Congratulations on your well deserved win Pandita with your hilarious poem, thoroughly enjoyed reading. :))
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Pandita Sanchez
Date: 7/23/2018 3:14:00 PM
Hi Roy, thank you so much for your kind congratulatory words and lovely compliments! So glad you enjoyed reading it. Have a great week ahead! Hugs. Pandita
Date: 7/22/2018 12:02:00 PM
Pandita, I love how you turn this embarrassing moment into a winner ! So very clever indeed! Still laughing! Congratulations on your awesome win! Hugs Eve
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Pandita Sanchez
Date: 7/23/2018 3:08:00 PM
Hello Eve, I am so delighted that you enjoyed reading this piece and got a good laugh. Thank you my friend for your kind words of praise! Have a wonderful week ahead! Hugs and love. Pandita
Date: 7/22/2018 11:31:00 AM
Well Pandita this stinker rose to the top. Congrats of peeeeuuuuuu's are in order
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Pandita Sanchez
Date: 7/23/2018 3:06:00 PM
Hahahaha - now you have me laughing :-)! Thank you John for your congratulatory words which I greatly appreciate! Have a nice evening! Love. Pandita
Date: 7/22/2018 10:43:00 AM
HAha..this was a riot Pandita...Congrats on your win..
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Pandita Sanchez
Date: 7/23/2018 3:00:00 PM
Hi Joseph, I am delighted that you got a good laugh with this piece! Thank you so much for your congratulations! Hugs and love. Pandita
Date: 7/22/2018 10:06:00 AM
Back with big congratulations Pandita, well done. Tom.
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Pandita Sanchez
Date: 7/23/2018 2:44:00 PM
Thank you so very much Tom for swinging back and for your wonderful show of support! Have a great week my friend! Hugs. Pandita
Date: 7/22/2018 9:35:00 AM
Congrats on your first place win!
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Pandita Sanchez
Date: 7/23/2018 1:57:00 PM
Thank you, thank you, dear Tania for your lovely congratulations! Have a beautiful day! Hugs and love. Pandita
Date: 7/22/2018 9:22:00 AM
Pandita congratulations on your top win in Charles's contest
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Pandita Sanchez
Date: 7/23/2018 1:54:00 PM
Hi BW, thank you so very much for visiting and leaving me your very lovely congratulatory words! Love and hugs. Pandita
Date: 7/22/2018 7:53:00 AM
Back for congrats, Pandita! Well-deserved top win!
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Pandita Sanchez
Date: 7/23/2018 1:52:00 PM
Hi Kim, I truly appreciate your visit and kind congratulatory words! Thank you so much! Best regards. Pandita
Date: 7/22/2018 7:30:00 AM
Lol, it was a really cute and lovely write, so much fun to read and I really enjoyed reading it, many congratulations on your top in the contest, good luck and have a really nice day
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Pandita Sanchez
Date: 7/23/2018 1:47:00 PM
Hi Faraz, glad you enjoyed this one! Thank you for stopping by and leaving your lovely congratulatory words! Hugs and best regards. Pandita
Date: 7/22/2018 7:17:00 AM
Dropping back with my congrats Pandita, you blew away the competition with this poem lol:-) hugs Jan xx
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Pandita Sanchez
Date: 7/23/2018 10:52:00 AM
Thank you, my friend, for your continued encouragement and support! Love and hugs. Pandita
Date: 7/22/2018 6:40:00 AM
Absolutely hilarious! Congratulations on your win with this smellbinding masterpiece! ;) xomo!
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Pandita Sanchez
Date: 7/23/2018 10:49:00 AM
Thank you Maureen for your kind congratulations and wonderful compliments! Love and hugs. Pandita
Date: 7/22/2018 6:14:00 AM
Congratulations on your top win in my contest, Pandita...this was hilarious! Charlie
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Pandita Sanchez
Date: 7/23/2018 10:46:00 AM
My friend, thank you for this top placement, and I am so thrilled that you had a good laugh with this one! Love and hugs. Pandita
Date: 7/13/2018 12:26:00 AM
Ha, ha! Epic tale … As we used to say back in the day: He who smelt it dealt it! This one's a winner in my book, Pandita. Best wishes, Gershon
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Pandita Sanchez
Date: 7/13/2018 8:18:00 AM
Hehehe - so glad you got a good laugh, my friend! I really laughed out loud while writing it! Thank you so much! Hugs and love. Pandita
Date: 7/12/2018 1:32:00 PM
Cute... nicely written
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Pashang Salehi
Date: 7/15/2018 1:35:00 AM
Always... Pandita, did you know that our initials are the same... P.S
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Pandita Sanchez
Date: 7/12/2018 1:50:00 PM
Hi Pashang, thank you for stopping by and I'm happy you liked this poem! Have a good day, my friend! Best regards. Pandita
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