Best Kit And Caboodle Poems

I just found out two poodles that I bought
were ferrets!  Ay caramba! And guess what?

To make each one resemble less a rat,
they gave them steroids, making them both fat!

They also fluffed their pretty fur just so
around their heads. So how was I to know?

Each...

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Similar sounds and letter alliteration are literally leaping and precipitously punctuating the 
perforated pages of my mired, muddled mind.. 
     Making mental maps for future fun in meditation mired muse, meticulously masks the 
real reasons I rise from my favorite fluffy...

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I went out for the newspaper at the usual time this morning, shortly after 5AM, (yes, I'm one of the "odd few" who still enjoys the crisp feel of a morning paper in my hands), and while it's now light that time of day, (and...

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I confess I've been known to partake
Straight icing sans chocolate cake
I concede I shall never be lean
Pouring fudge without the ice cream

It's apparent my tool-shed doth grow
Baked cookies? Just gimmie the dough
It is rumored that I often spread
Peanut butter and jam (hold the bread)

From grandma...

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Sausage some call me
I beg to disagree.

I know I am not tall 
In fact I am quite small
My body long and thin
About which I never grin.

Low to the ground
Is how I trot around
Floppy ears hanging down
Makes me look like a clown.

I will make a wish...

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A Jim-Jam Mickey-Mouse Poem

I think that you might never see
A poem as weird as this might be
For I’ll use luscious words
That otherwise might sound absurd
This poem may turn out silly-sally
Or even a bit dillydally
In hindsight this whole kit and caboodle
May come across as dipsy-doodle 
I’ll...

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Woodle's sidekick Noodle
                                         Bought a...

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The Labradoodle

It’s clear that the scamp is a Poodle
By its frolicsome dabble and doodle
But add a big part
Of the Labrador’s heart
And you’ve got the whole kit and caboodle

The Labrador Retriever (Lab)

The Lab a friend gave to his daughter
Had a chronic aversion to water
He’d cling to...

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I ain't surprised by anything I hear on the news nowadays!
The way the gov'mint is bein' run just leaves me in a daze!
This mornin' I heard another of Obama's schemes has gone sour!
Seems that this lulu will add more to China's balance of power!

His stim-scheme...

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Us guys never lose our love for the opposite sex

It's deeply engrained in our psyche

It's obvious every single day of our lives

We travel life's highway admiring the scenery passing by

This one make me sit up and take notice

That one turns my rusty old crank

Now this...

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The Slide Ruler

As regulations rule this world from outside in and my time slowly
                 seeps away on this planet’s realm I gaze in awe at that once modern
instrument of...

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only by a fluke did I manage 
   to worm winning trust 
   among Christmas elves and reindeer
confident this generic guy, 

   would never breach scandalous 
   tidbits, into a an underground impregnable   
 ...

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Have you ever seen a kangaroo
Who's a little bit off his noodle
He hops around like a crazy galoot
Who's lost his kit and caboodle

Sometimes barks like a little doggy
And chases cars and trucks
At times he meows like a *****cat
Or sometimes quacks like a duck

Once got amorous...

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Have you ever seen a  kangaroo
Who's a little bit off his noodle
He hops around like a crazy galoot
Who's lost his kit and caboodle

He sometimes barks like a doggy
And chases cars and trucks
At times he meows like a kitty cat
Or sometimes quacks like a duck

Once...

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If there's frost on your noodle, don't despair
It's a sign of genius if you've got grey hair

But the experts say when the colour takes flight
Intelligence doesn't just happen overnight

It takes years and years of bumps and grinds
So make sure you don't get left behind

To survive...

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