Best First Off Poems
First off let's make it clear I ain't funny
And I don't start conversations out with bonjour
But there comes a time in every mans life
Where he needs a good Man-icure
When you hit the age of me on the same feet
It's time to give the old dogs a break
Empty out your calendar this will take all day for sure
And you don't want distractions in the way
Cause when the hair on your toes could keep an Eskimo clothed
And carpet his whole family's igloo
That's when you know it's time to call up your Bro's
And go visit an Asian or two
A pedicure for a man to remove the toe jam
Like they would weapons of mass destruction
But let's not call it a date cause that just sounds gay
Let's say outing or a manly luncheon
Like a kid in a candy store given chocolate galore
With no earthly thoughts of calories
Signed up for the 5 gold star plan soon to be a new man
Where you're bound to not recognize me
From hot wax to cream to all things in between
Why they even buffed my buff
From bottom to top they did the whole lot
And yes I liked it...thank you very much
As we went through the day the new me being made
Rolling me from dock to dock
Then came to the time we stopped short of a dime
When they wanted to give me a bikini WHAT?!?
That's where I drew the line there's just some things I find
That a Manly Man would never stand
We went back to the front, that's enough of this lunch!
THAT gold star wasn't in my plan
Would I do it again? All you gotta do is say when...
But next time round believe me
When it comes to the stars I'll stop at the 4
Which I believe is the boxer instead of bikini
The confusion resulting from a kiss
Has left me with anything but bliss
If it’s confusing, it’s not from God
Because He doesn’t leave you odd
The feelings I feel are not real love
They should be there from above
But I know that it is only a lust
Because it isn’t built on real trust
Though I care deeply for this man
There is something special in his hand
He has a piece of my heart with him
But I’m not sure it’s not just his whim
I want to be closer to him first off
There is not a reason to scoff
I yearn for a relationship of hearts
That goes over the uttermost charts
He may be filled with resentment
Because I didn’t give him contentment
But I want to get to know him better
Maybe have him read some of my letter
It’s a love story that is built on attraction
Sometimes I feel like I’m filled with distraction
Does he really feel love for my heart?
Or is this such a great place to start?
I want to show him that I care deeply
Maybe that I could possibly be his sweetie
But I’m so unsure of how to make it work
My honest duties I refuse to shirk
I’m leaving it in the hands of my Jesus
The only One alive who truly frees us
From worry, fear and a reluctance to love
With joy, boldness and kindness from above
My wallet has credit cards
And my I.D.
(My license to drive
With a picture of me.)
My library card and
My store discount stash
Share limited space with
My limited cash.
Insurance I.D.'s,
Safety pins and receipts
Nestle next to my photos,
Such room-hogging treats.
Appointment reminders,
My pass for the Zoo
Stretch the leather along with
My Garden pass, too.
Add a band-aid and stamps
And a bunch of loose change;
When I take out my wallet,
Folks look at me strange.
I bought a small pocketbook -
Thought I would try it -
But first off, my wallet
Must go on a diet!
This is a glimpse
Of what I believe
As far as religion,
And my personal creed
You don’t have to like it
Nor do you have to agree
Just trying to show you
A little of what makes me, me
First off, let’s get this straight
I don’t follow any certain faith
I’m simply a Christian
Who loves His Praise
Yes I believe in Heaven
And yes I believe in Hell
But I also believe, in purgatory as well
Along with reincarnation
Of the spirit within all;
I know this may sound weird to some
And others may very well relate
But this is the base,
Of my religious convictions
Put together in the only form
I know how to translate;
I wasn’t raised on religion
I found it own my own
I know that I’m forgiven
For the things I didn’t know
I know He stands beside me
Through all the good and bad
He guides my when I’m lost
And cheers me when I’m sad
His miracles are shed upon me
Sometimes in multitudes
If only I could explain these wonders
So you had a better view
My soul is filled with His Spirit
His forgiveness never ceases to astound
He’ll love you so completely
And never let you down
His wisdom far exceeds
The likes of any man you know
Man will never know the mysteries
They so often try to disclose,
Scientist and Atheists
Both stand on common ground
All too often they don’t believe
For physical evidence can’t be found
I find these people shallow
And fervently pray for their souls
And this is a special message
For people just like those
Satan is still among us
Whether you choose to believe or not
And if you have no religion
Then your soul he has surely got
He loves to feed on your tears
To push the limit of your fears
He loves to poison your mind
With the lies he so likes to tell
He will surely guide you
Straight to the gates of Hell
His work is all around us
His powers are close to Gods
He is the master of deceit
Trust him you should not;
So look deep inside yourself
And try to see who you are
And if you don’t see anything
Then you should listen to your heart
The Lords Grace is all around us
Amidst this devils lair
His people are among us
For there are angels everywhere!
For days at a time there is nothing to eat,
There is no where to sleep.
Hunger is a social condition.
It is a horrible physical way of living.
It leads to malnutrition, famine, and starvation.
It is a plaque and epidemic in poor nations.
First off there is so many children and adults with improper diets or nutrition.
Hunger affects about a sixth of the world's total population.
Why can't we get together, and try to feed the poor,
If we all came together as a whole we can do more.
Let's pray poverty away
We have to make this dark cloud of hunger into a brighter day.
Due to hunger more than 1 die each second.
So to eat a plate of food now days is a blessing.
About 750,000 suffer from hunger due to financial restrictions.
So now I ask you how are we Americans living?
But if we were all well-fed,
Let us not forget about the homeless, because half of us go hungry to our beds.
Matthew 5:6 “Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they shall be
satisfied.
Dear POETRYSOUP, Hope this finds YOU and YOURS Healthy and High in the Spirit. I am writing this on the Inspiration of Heather Ober's Contest "Love Letter". First off I want to Thank-YOU all for YOUR many Gracious Comments. They are appreciated and Inspirational. Some of YOU know about my strokes and the handicap they cause me, as far as writing any comments back to YOU. I am sorry.A few of YOU know about my stomach cancer,and how the doctors removed half of my stomach and replaced it with whatever they replace stomach lineing with. However that lining ripped and I go for surgery tomorrow. Here is my delima; After the recovery from the surgery they want me to move back to the apartment (they pay for) and leave my Cabin on the mountain for ever. I have a 24/7 nurse,(and my Spirit Nurse; Suzanne Delaney) his name is Nick and he said he would stay with me at the cabin (with a cut in pay). now I do not know why Nick is a Nurse and not a Doctor, he can do everything but surgery. sorry I am rambling.
YOU are probable saying to Yourselves "What has this got to do with LOVE? By my cabin I have a house, actually a Shrine : to my DEAREST Most Only Beloved LENORE : my
Wife. I have her POETRY, her Pictures and her Butterfly collection. I had the only thing left from Our Everlasting Day; Her Transparent White Wedding Vail, stolen 4 years ago in a break-in. So my ? to my Beloved Family : POETRYSOUP is :Should I go to the Apartment(across the street from hospital)or spend the next 6 moths to a year at the cabin where my True LOVE abides,with Doctor Nick. I LOVE YOU ALWAYS and FOREVER YOUR Loyal Liege...HGarvey Daniel Esquire Aka - Harry - HG
"Mother’s Milk"
I don’t know -
what would you have me say?
Life is a gourmand perfume
rolling along on the notes of air
intoxicating musk a jubilee
music you breathe and reign in
words lactonic heaven scent
stimulating the beginning and the end
in synaesthesia the let-down presents
succulent life, a moment brief and swift
a hint of warm peppered cinnamon
with gunshot sparks recalcitrant pink
a straight shot from the heady accord first off
hard points from mother’s breast rouge the plot
we drink it all in
life is the sweetest illusion
bittersweet and burnt bent
we are all drunk to it;
before we begin,
we begin again,
we are swallowed large
into this small life
like an unknown mystery
karmic charms chime in
fragrant and in fragrant notes
recalcitrant journeys
roads less taken
sweet and bitter almonds
we hear the distant bells chime
we sign off reluctantly
to only begin it all again
Candide Diderot. ‘25
This is the third in a trilogy of steeler poems and while it is good on its own.I really had fun with this one. All three need read for the full story to be told.
Oh they have won the Superbowl
It's what I said would be
The Seahawks wings were clipped
Now we can laugh, hee hee
I am so excited
I want to give a cry
The Steelers won the Superbowl
They did it on the fly
Now a wildcard was their fate
No chance to win at all
At least that's what the experts said
This trip came with a fall.
First off would be the Bengals
These cats would show their claws
They almost won the game
But we showed up their flaws
There quarterback would stumble
He'd have to leave the game
Without him they were lost
Without him they were lame
Next would be the colts
Which was the favorite team
They thundered with their hooves
Each game they played was lean
This did not faze these men
Who'd tame and brake these colts
No one would stop these guys
Will Ben through thunderbolts
Two games they played that day
As the refs played dirty pool
But they would not be stopped
Oh they would win this duel
It almost did not happen
As the bus would lose the ball
But Ben would make an awesome save
With that they'd win it all
Now Denver came up next
But they'd fall like all before
These broncos would be busted
Then wipped til they were sore
Now that's how they arrived
To play in the big game
They brought home number five
Now we're not quite the same
The Bus now has retired
To the hall of fame he's bound
Now Ward won MVP
He play this game quite sound
Big Ben was not his best
Still though he won the game
The youngest to do so
This year none will complain
With that I'll end this poem
It's been a great great ride
I hope to see it come again
So we can tan some hide.
In youth I learned to jump
First off steps, then rooftops
Spirit of adventure
Nurtured in the heart of a child
Preschool acrobat twirling on my head
Grandma swatted my bottom
Repeated words like Tomboy
Never learned to be ladylike
Catholic school discipline
Uniforms, religion classes, daily mass
Never satisfied with any accomplishment
Even the nuns called me “perfectionist”
Blessed with storytellers in my family
Dad and sis would send me to dreamland
On the wings of a unicorn
Or Shakespeare’s amazing plays
Family and friends I hold dear
Each has influenced my thinking
I learned to offer support in troubled times
And to thank God every day for special people
Unable to have children
The most crushing blow
Accepted at a young age
But rued for a lifetime
Lover of Jack London, John Steinbeck
From Jack, I found adventure
From John, I learned compassion
Dickinson’s poetry touched my heart
If I can find a way
To make a friend feel joy
Then this is my mission
Comforter, nurturer
November 16, 2020
For Silent One’s “It's a part of me - Life and the perceptions and philosophies you hold Poetry Contest.”
on behalf of the little guy
deep behind enemy territory
welcome to the nameless republic
all good capitalists want a monopoly
all good physicians need you sick
the National Antidote Party broke down the door
I told them everything I know
so they let me off the meat hook
loosened my bindings and necktie
hammered nails in my head instead
powerful radio transmitter nails
don't get too close I'll bend your spoon
gimme a shot of Moonbeam barkeep
and a round for my ill-bandaged crew
we'll drink to the muse Pandemonia
don't get too close she’ll bend yer crank
with another specious spectacle
not necessarily Beauty's anointed
but a piston riding party girl nonetheless
I let you touch happy place
and now my theory on the blinding of Oedipus
which first off requires a family unit
for the inherent predispositions of childbirth
they made me walk upon magic carpet tacks
so me and my echo are here a little late
and a little paraplegic and screaming headaches
this is after all a holy epic of pilgrimage
from the sands of Delirium to the banks of Delusia
a simultaneous ambiance one for each eye
an ancient art form somewhat updated
coordinating the cascades of impulses
yet still black as the inside of a cow I mean crow
this epic deals with a touchy subject
intercession of the gods
grab your hat mister
we're going for a little joy ride
where anything including countries
can be bought sold and stolen
by the mutilators of comparison
hardwired and proud of it the fools
built for Survival the TV show
but times change and
survival meant finding parking
where one can escalate from emaciation
to farting obesity overnight
unrecognized even when brightly illuminated
we know only one thing for certain
that the Universe is knowable
From "Engine of Didactic Beauty" available on Amazon
Artist Portfolio: http://walteralter.byethost32.com/
From the beginning of time there has been exploration
To undiscovered places by every rich nation
Mans great love for exploring has moved up a gear
He has accepted a new challenge; the final frontier.
Nineteen fifty seven saw the launch of sputnik one
Followed by sputnik two, the space race had begun
Russia was the first off the starting block
America was busy working around the clock.
The following year America entered the race
By sending explorer one up into space
Russia then sent up their first cosmonaut
America then followed with an astronaut.
America was now leading in the race for space
President Kennedy’s wanted a man, on the moons surface
The whole world was watching, they were eager to see
Eagle Landers touchdown in the sea of tranquillity.
Research and development is now taking place
To establish planet Mars as a forwarding base
Future missions will refuel and take on supplies
So astronauts can venture out into darker skies.
Look up on a clear night and look for the space station
Manned by astronauts from more than one nation
Mankind has shown that he has the capability
By developing spacecraft that was once fantasy.
There have been many celebrations and even some tears
Accidents have caused deaths of some brave pioneers
Two NASA space shuttles, Colombia and Challenger
Both exploded above the earth a tragic disaster.
Our sun will die out and mankind needs to survive
A new home is needed so humans can thrive
Mankind will colonise planets that’s a certainty
Using great minds to develop new technology.
Space exploration is new and is painfully slow
In the big scheme of things, we’ve a long way to go
But one day these dreams will become reality
As man ventures further out, beyond our own galaxy.
Written 30th March 2018.
First off-
you're E~did,
fawned like frozen in a wrong beam of time-
God is only justified by his own usury,
and we don't do the forgotten as a figurine...
We all are falling,
forwardly and softly forestalled,
faked,
forgiving four fickle frogs,
finding our fifty nine frot foe,
just as we fizzle the fantastic flowing fight, fitted-
if that's enough to gloat see me stuck in the next simple dictionary-
having nothing to say to the ears of men who listen,
children who dream,
women who can misinterpret.
Sleeping is optional,
sojourn is an ancient land full of those flaws,
free,
we are not this-
fleet,
we are so fast at adeptly encouraging the sanctimony of the next...
Just a few lines I hereby write to let you know
that I, in my entirety am still alive,
care I give, when with pen perceiving you so slow
the words upon these lines, just in time will arrive.
You will not know the house, when you come on back home
twelve month ago the rent we defaulted, so we moved,
which was good for your mother, she’s too old to roam,
while it seems her affair with the rent man, unproved.
I’ve managed to get myself a really good job
having many hundreds of poor sods beneath me,
as greenkeeper, the graveyard grass I cut and swab,
that is when this terrible pain stops in my knee.
Your sister Edna has had a baby this week
not yet found out if baby boy or baby girl,
so don’t know if it’s got a tap to take a leak
or a hands free strikingly attractive pearl.
We both went to the doctor the other day
it’s your mother she is not keeping all that well,
the doctor placed a small tube down her passage way
said “Don’t talk”, I offered to buy, but wouldn’t sell.
Your uncle Raymond drowned last week in a large vat
this full of single malt whisky at the brewery,
workmates tried to save him, but he fought them off, drat,
cremated, fire took days to douse, come floury.
The weather is o.k.; it has rained twice this week
first off for three days, then the other for four days,
then undertaker rang, sounded very bleak
said, “Payment for grandma’s grave, or does not here stays”.
Oh! by the way I was to send you some money
but I forgot to place it in the envelope,
sealed it with kiss, thought you may think that’s funny
till you hear mum gave you to the charity “SCOPE”.
© Harry J Horsman 2012
the idea is not mine originally, it is
An adaptation of an Irish letter.
Dear mom,
Tonight I went to a party, and I followed your advice.
About how drinking and driving was naughty, and definitely unwise.
So I opted for soda instead mom, because I knew that you were right.
Tonight I felt amazing, because I followed your advice.
Maybe my friends planned on getting hammered, but I decided to think twice.
I followed your words of wisdom mom, and couldn't help but feel accomplished.
Because even if my friends were drinking, my morals wouldn't be demolished.
Tonight I decided to leave mom, as quickly as I could.
To make it back before midnight, just like you said I should.
Other people left too mom, but didn't listen like I did.
Everything was fine mom, until that driver came about.
Swerving and sliding, and hitting me like I was nothing more than a cloud.
The shattering sound of glass was distant, but I knew that we had crashed.
All because another driver decided it was okay to drive smashed.
I'm halfway through the windshield, the smell of blood is potent.
There are voices all around, mom, but I just can't seem to focus.
My life just flashed before me, a whirlwind of scenes and thoughts.
But the biggest thing I can think of now is how the driver knew 'x' marked the spot.
I hear the officers talking, they don't try to be quiet at all.
They say what a pity it is, because I'm the one who will take the fall.
I don't understand mom, exactly where I failed?
I listened, obeyed, yet here I am; halfway through and impaled.
They're saying he was drunk mom, too drunk to understand.
And maybe when he wakes up, he'll become a different man.
They're saying I probably won't make it. That my chances are very slight.
My eyes are growing heavy mom, I'm going to lose this fight.
I just can't comprehend it mom, why do I have to pay?
He's the one who drank and drove and decided to irrationally behave.
My eyes are starting to close, and the world is turning grey.
But before I go mom, there are some things I need to say:
First off mom, you were right, about driving while impaired.
All rational thoughts go out the window, all lives impacted by despair.
I love you more than anything, and I'm sorry this is how it ends.
Tell them all my story mom, make them think again.
First off let's make it clear I ain't funny
And I don't start conversations out with bonjour
But there comes a time in every mans life
Where he needs a good Man-icure
When you hit the age of me on the same feet
It's time to give the old dogs a break
Empty out your calendar this will take all day for sure
And you don't want distractions in the way
Cause when the hair on your toes could keep an Eskimo clothed
And carpet his whole family's igloo
That's when you know it's time to call up your Bro's
And go visit a Asian or two
A pedicure for a man to remove the toe jam
Like they would weapons of mass destruction
But let's not call it a date cause that just sounds gay
Let's say outing or a manly luncheon
Like a kid in a candy store given chocolate galore
With no earthly thoughts of calories
Signed up for the 5 gold star plan soon to be a new man
Where you're bound to not recognize me
From hot wax to cream to all things in between
Why they even buffed my buff
From bottom to top they did the whole lot
And yes I liked it...thank you very much
As we went through the day the new me being made
Rolling me from dock to dock
Then came to the time we stopped short of a dime
When they wanted to give me a bikini WHAT?!?
That's where I drew the line there's just some things I find
That a Manly Man would never stand
We went back to the front, that's enough of this lunch!
THAT gold star wasn't in my plan
Would I do it again? All you gotta do is say when...
But next time round believe me
When it comes to the stars I'll stop at the 4
Which I believe is boxer instead of bikini