Best Customer Service Poems

I'm still waiting
How much time has elapsed
Think I'll read
While I'm waiting
I just read a chapter

I do believe my call is being answered
No, a voice on a machine echoes
"Your call will be taken in the order in which it was received"

Great
What number caller was I
Probably the...

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"Thank you for calling ACME, INCORPORATED"
"For English, press 1"
"En Espanol, numero dos"
(Customer presses 1)
"If this is a business, press 1"
"If this is a residence, press 2"
(Customer presses 2)

"Please listen carefully to the following"
(Customer listens)
"If you have an account, press 1"
"For new service, press 2"
(Customer presses...

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The bill declared, in bright red ink,
“Your payment’s overdue.
We’ll hand it to collectors
If your check’s not coming through.”

Insurance said they’d paid it;
Prior phone calls should’ve ended it.
At last I reached a human
Who, quite shockingly, amended it.

Not only that, he went beyond
And then apologized.
I must admit,...

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Hi how are you?

          What seems to be the problem?

I’m so sorry about that.
                      ...

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I took on a job I thought that I liked,
a service I have to provide.
Giving customers help with things that go wrong
always makes me feel happy inside .

For many long years I have done really well
and I’m sure it is me who knows best.
If it...

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Hey you! Did you hear me?
I was talking but you ever won’t listen.
Hey babe I want to buy this!
Did I just see your eyes rolling at me?
Called you many times.
Are you deaf to hear me hundred times?
So you’re now pissing me off!
Don’t wait to see...

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Honestly, I admit that I hate you
With every fiber of my being,
Because, no matter what I try to do,
My efforts are not what you are seeing.
I have to tell you that you are the most
Arrogant, obnoxious, self-absorbed wretch,
Who has no character of which to boast,
Which...

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It was the work ethic that did it.
He just couldn’t get enough.
He would sit for hours and hours
Just contemplating the stuff
Until suddenly it was home time,
Getting on for half past four,
And he knew that in the morning
They'd have delivered plenty more.

After nearly a week they...

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OUTBACK AUSTRALIA CUSTOMER SERVICE
Tis the aussie outback,
 a cocky walks a dusty shearing track,
to the only crackling phone for miles around,
climbing an old dead tractor for best sound,
bout a sheep disorder from an online order.

"Gudday customer service mate" 
Farmer White's gravel voice in wait.
"Ullo, you...

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Imagine My surprise,
Not only in getting through in under 2 minutes, 
But also being helped by the first res-ponder

But wait it, didn't stop there,
I felt I was actually being treated as a customer,
And what I had to say was important.

What motivated me, you may well...

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As a volunteer in a coffee shop as a waitress,
I provide customer service all the time.
Sometimes I make mistakes,
Other times I provide good customer service.

One day a customer came in for lunch,
She ordered a toastie and chose the middle line of fillings.
She didn’t realise the...

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Everyone
is slow to respond
21st century...

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Customer Service
return call within 24 hours
leave message...

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   The cashier guessed I was 58
     The bagger, less than that

   They know how to make this shopper feel great 
     I’ll be shopping there every May 28
...

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Hello, Dear, I trust the garbage in the road was picked up on Friday.
To add insult to the sweetness,
“I think it amusing there is a no dumping sign” across from where they have dumped.
Yes, I too think it bitterly amusing, since this pile from hell...

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