Best Cunning Poems
There is a very cunning ham named Tom
Pens side-splitting limericks with aplomb
When Soupers are down
Tom removes their frowns
And their funny bones explode like a bomb
We love you, Tom!
Tom flew down to Turkey to play
But found at the end of the day
Putin had to gobble
So there was a squabble
Hence the Marmite-Putin soufflé
There's a certain cunning ham named Tom
Who once crafted limericks with aplomb
Lately, no funny new lims
Has Tom's funny bone dimmed -- NO
His computer's been infected with ROM!
Generous
A leader whose Caring, Brave, Honest, and Funny
Family of Heath
She’s a lover of reading, art, and acting
A woman who feels compassion, hardship, and love
Who fears the dark, spiders, and being hurt
A dreamer who would like to see the future, the world, and him
She’s a resident of small town Hemet
Cunning
I’m a broken man
don’t know who to trust.
Being a broken man
allows you not to trust.
I’m a broken man
with lots of blood,
bleeding from the heart like a river.
Being a broken man
helps people raft on the red stream
And they don’t give a damn, whether you die in shiver
The moon is the only friend
who acknowledges my tears.
Stars, like a bodyguard
help me fight out my fears.
But sun, sometimes behaves as a foe
for his rays of light,
focuses me to reach my actual height.
Nevertheless, I’m a broken man.
Broken down piece by piece
by the sword, of the goddess of beauty
sharpened up with innocence, cunning ferocity.
Never even cared, if I’m happy or sad,
wouldn’t even matter if I’m alive or dead.
I’m a broken man,
who knows how to fix the glasses.
But, being a broken man,
There comes a why.
Why even bother , rebuilding it.
Everything broken down into bits and pieces.
And so am I.
My mother was spring cleaning
So I needed a reason to escape
I have got a devilish mind
and my cunning plan is taking shape.
The plug has fallen off the hoover
I've unscrewed the head from the sweeping brush
A little superglue on the furniture polish
and the button will not push .
Tomato ketchup on my white sock
I've trodden on a nail
Link that my acting
and my cunning plan can't fail
but mothers know when something is fishy
She gave me that look that doesn't need to speak
I lost use of my computer
and got grounded for a week.
It's ecstasy without the pill
alarm lights flashing 69
Tarzan Lord of jungle fever
the taste of sweet nectar!
Foreplay of the gods
slippery when wet
I gaze upwards
lust devours you.
Such a lovely garden
I love your comfort food
you the naughty schoolgirl
in my headmasters office.
Your sighs and moans
rise to the heavens
carrying aphrodisiac scent
from your lovely pollen!
~ ~ ~ ~
A cunning linguist is my Romeo,
whose tongue has tasted ev’ry inch of me
ravenously from head to toe and—Oh!
in between—that I’m wet with ecstasy!
With lips on breasts, he kisses my firm nipples
first, then bites and nibbles on them like candy;
now wet with excitement, my genitals
beg for the strokes of his tongue to eat me.
Supine, I spread wide for him as his hands
prime my vagina—first the labials—
then my fluttering vulva—which expands
like a bloom for all of my man’s essentials.
Then, his lusty tongue slays my ********!—
so I then beg for the cock of my Horace.
As you read this poem, I’m mentally undressing you.
Word by word your protests drop to the floor.
Syllable by syllable I pare you down to honest flesh.
Utterance by utterance, your secrets are revealed
Until you’re nude, standing before me
Natural and unembellished, so you can truly appreciate
The intense sincerity of my words.
Then I’ll softly stroke your personal pronouns
And delicately fondle all your feminine articles.
I’ll take a most teasing interest in your superlative adjectives.
And for your pleasure, I’ll lovingly coordinate your conjunctions.
My linguistic interlocution will then slowly, slowly, slowly
Coax your previously in-transitive verbs to thrill
To multiple, unutterably intense and delicious
Spasms of orgasmic literary ecstasy!!!
And that’s just the table of contents.
P.S. Always practice safe text.
sun’s coat on the maize
here and there the squirrel ducks
leaving her to pant
©GraceM Composition
My doctor says I’m overweight,
I’m in the orange band,
To make it to the yellow zone
I’ll need a helping hand.
So he’s cancelled Sunday breakfast
And sworn me off scotch eggs,
He’s drained my car of petrol
Chuckling ‘Learn to use your legs!’
But I don’t really buy it.
There’s alternatives to diet.
I used to have a ponytail,
So first I had that chopped.
I filed off my fingernails -
They didn’t do a lot.
I syphoned every orifice,
That’s ears and nostrils too,
Then shaved all up and down the stairs
And blocked my pores with glue.
I bought myself a leotard
All webbed and made of feather
And leaf-thin flip-flops filled with air
(I’m hoping for good weather).
So the morning of the retest came,
I wandered down the road
And got savaged by a pit bull,
Who chewed off all my toes.
And thanks to that good fortune,
When I stepped on the machine,
The doctor said ‘I’ve got good news!
You’re one gram in the green.’
The Cunning Stranger at Dragon's Lair - A Narrative Poem
One day at a comic shop,
I met a man selling cats,
For the money, he wanted to swap,
But I really wanted some bats.
"Got any bats?" asked I.
"For that's how I'll spend my money (wow)."
"No bats here!" said the guy.
He seemed to find it quite funny.
This ain’t no zoo or pet store!
"We've got some interesting comics,
I'll give you a very fine price."
"I'd rather have some ergonomics."
The man blinked rapidly thrice.
The store owner said I got Batman # 7;
The man said I’d rather have rabies.
The man seemed exceptionally energetic,
And his manner was strangely amused.
He wasn't what I would call acetic,
The great disdain he noticeably oozed.
Like others, he thought I was odd,
Some say I'm a bit cunning.
Still, he gave me a courteous nod,
As if he thought I was plenty stunning.
In his hand was Spider-man # 5.
In mint condition worth $1.000.00, what a fine;
So in search of my goal I departed,
But before the comic shop could I leave,
The man came running full-hearted,
"I can help you I believe."
"Cats, bats, you shall not find.
Comics, ergonomics, you can get.
You must now open your mind,
And get down to Dragon's Lair Comics.
So to Dragon's Lair Comics, I decided to go,
In search of the bats, I craved.
The winds it did eerily blow.
But I felt that the day could be saved.
There were stalls selling comics,
Role-playing cards many heroes shades.
There were even stalls selling home economics
People were scattered from many trades
I was greeted by a peculiar lady,
She seemed to be rather cunning
I couldn't help thinking she might be quite shady.
I wondered if she was at all stunning.
Before I could open my mouth,
She shouted, "For you, I have some bats!"
I headed towards her, to the south,
Past some comics and cats.
"But how did you know?" I asked,
"Do you want them or not?" she did say.
Silently, the bats she passed.
Then vanished before I could pay.
As I walked away I heard a crackle
Or was it, perhaps, a hushed cackle?
Next door to the comic shop Acme Pet Store?
For you see a pet bat, not a cat or a comic was I looking for
6/6/19
Written words by James Edward Lee Sr.
An accountant asks for accuracy
Playing figures
Always got his mind tangled
Blurring his eyes
And so bustling the calculator
Making his neck strained and fingers stiff
But the cunning figures
Still manage to escape
From his balance sheet sometimes
Causing him a severe headache
What's more
So surprisingly
Sometimes has to go all the ways
To make fool of the figures
For tax evasion
Making himself
Restless and guilty
For the rest of the day
For the rest of his career life
reared many rabbits by habit
to harvest cotton wool from them
for textile industries abroad
that they could make winter clothing
for charity to hot desert dwellers
years have past since I felt loves spark
Dancing through the park
Trying to kick start my lonely heart
Getting my feelings out there among the visual arts
Hoping to find a place to out smart
What makes love disappear into the dark
Keeping a safety chain around all the best parts
Looking for a woman willing to give all her heart
Realizing when love starts your way
You must have all your feelers on display
Igniting emotions that have come into play
Trusting God has brought fourth that special day
Igniting my spirit like a shooting dart
Seeking to find a loving heart
That captures loves spark
Leaping through all the top charts
Finding a woman who is ready to depart
One that is beautiful, cunning and smart
Real cutie that is full of internal beauty
Who is proud of her outstanding booty
Woman whose love is on full duty
She is done eluding the past
Someone who lives in the moment having a blast
Who is ready for true love that will surpass
Creating everlasting feelings that will surly last
When all the parts of my heart are unmast
Revealing an amazing sweetheart
Who wants forever love from the very start