Best Cousin Poems
~PLEASE~
Please pick me up!
Never mind I'm gonna fall, anyways
Please show me how to tie my shoes and sing a song!
Don't worry mommy, I'll walk barefoot and teach myself one day
Please daddy show me how to ride my bike!
Never mind It takes up too much of your time
Mommy, please do not hit me again!
It's okay, I need to be taught a lesson
Cousin please do not touch!
Go ahead, they won't believe me anyway
Teacher, please defend me in school!
Never mind, my body is used to the abuse
Please don't tell me sleeping with you is the only way!
Okay, I need to be loved even if it's for one night
Please teach me how to raise a baby!
It's okay, I can't blame others for my mistake
Please don't get violent when you drink tonight!'
If it makes you feel better hit me,
I'll hide the bruise with makeup & tears
Please tell me that I'm beautiful!
Wait! Your right I'll never look like her!
Please someone call 911!
Never mind, it's only a broken bone
Officer, please don't take my husband?
Don't you know it was my fault, he loves me and won't hit me again
Please don't ask what happen to my face!
That's what I get for standing up and defending myself
Please God don't take my baby!
Go ahead and take her I don't deserve her
Please don't tell me your not in love with me!
I understand I'll never be worthy of your heart
Please don't walk away and break my heart!
It's okay, I never made progress or was good enough
Please someone help, I'm hurting inside!
Never mind my feelings don't count
Please God, can you hear me!
Please God, can you rescue me!
Please God, can you walk with me!
Please God, can you show me the way!
God- I was a baby, I was weak, and did not talk
God- you didn't protect me on my first fall
God- I was abandoned and neglected before I learned to crawl!
God- even you rejected all my prayers and call
I understand now I don't need nothing!
I don't need no one at ALL
So PLEASE, PLEASE leave me alone, behind these walls
. **
Please! If you read this teach me how to smile
WAIT! Smiles don't come with self blame & guilt
by;PD
My favorite cousin named Marge
is almost as big as a barge.
So one would assume,
not knowing the groom,
the guy would most likely be large.
But he was a small man named Tim
“As thin as a broom” describes him.
While Marge would guffaw,
Tim would watch her with awe
and just smile for he was so prim!
When the preacher addressed him and said,
“You may now kiss the bride,” Tim turned red,
for their lips could not meet.
With high heels on her feet,
Marge stood towering over his head.
She leaned down while Tim stood on his toes,
but for being in such a strange pose,
Marge then came toppling down
crushing Tim neath her gown
while the whole church erupted in “Ohhhhh’s.”
All was well, and thereafter, we ate;
then we planned next to dance until late.
But none could foresee
the small tragedy
that had us all leaving by eight!
Marge had tossed off her heels for a glide
on the dance floor, but when they both tried
to dance, Tim got snagged
by that dang gown and dragged
as his bride was beginning to slide. . .
Now shoeless, poor Marge could not stop.
Toward a table with candles on top,
they slid, and the groom
then set fire to the room
by landing with a belly flop.
Poor Tim by the candles got lit,
and we were all having a fit,
for the fire got spread fast
till the Best Man at last
got us all wet extinguishing it!
Inspired by the title of the movie: My Big Fat Greek Wedding
& : Joann Grisetti's "My Cousin's Wedding" Poetry contest
The year 1890
December 29th
Wounded Knee, South Dakota
My tribe lost their lives
The USS 7th
On their orders so
To round up the Sioux
Railroad herd them and go
Us Lakota were next
To disarm their request
But my cousin Black Coyote
At best he was deaf
Not hearing the orders
To lay down our guns
A chain reaction
Ensued on my tribal ones
Chaos and mayhem
Distressed our grounds
This proud nation
Beaten down
Men, women and children
300 slain
Another reminder
For the white mans gain
To disrespect the fallen
Slows our souls to our gods
We were left in a blizzard
Hardened like logs
In three days we rose
Civilians did lift
And dumped us unceremoniously
In a hole in the drift
My corpse and my peoples
Stripped and robbed
As flakes of snow
Confirm our spirits have sobbed
As i am reborn again
In another country
It gives me the freedom
To look back and see
That December day in 1890
Gunning down innocent ones
Not so mighty
The Medal of Honor
In their distinguished past
The record still stands
On their chests they flash
But attitudes change
As two centuries pass
The Medal Of Honor
Has won back its class
No longer the weak
Gunned down by the strong
Its man against man
Sometimes they do wrong
So as i sit back in my adopted nation
Will i live again past this lives station
Writing the wrongs of modern man
This Lakota warrior who never ran
http://www.thehighlanderspoems.com/native-americans.php
My cousin Tallie
was a real-life
award winning
beauty queen
from age six to eighteen
The kind who seems
a cardboard cut-out
Southern stereotype
all big hair and hype
manicured nails and
well arranged...
assets
but in reality
there was much more to Tallie
Her favorite movie
was Fried Green Tomatoes
and as far as movies go
it was good
but I never understood
until much later
why she loved it so
At first I thought
she was obsessed with the dish
she just 'had to try' fried green tomatoes
with fried catfish...
But it was actually
more about “Towanda!”
the primal, female battle-cry
And there was something electrifying
heartbreaking and mystifying
in the way she had the nerve to
let loose
a hullabaloo
screaming “Towanda!”
without reserve
fully, freely
like a woman
on the very edge
with nothing left to lose
and that was true
Tallie'd been abused
but somehow
nobody chose to see that part
that she actually had
had a heart
that someone had torn apart
Now Tallie's a badass
with blue-green hair
and a hard edged manner
devil-may-care
she has a tattoo
for each person she held dear
far and near
dead and gone
and no one knows why
she's evasive, withdrawn
as they spew out their judgments
in-between their
slow Southern
matter-of-fact yawns
With all the details noticed
while picking her to pieces
how did they miss the moment
her innocence was taken
faith in mankind shaken
How the barefoot, crazy-haired Tallie
running free, suddenly
stopped entirely, sparkle gone
certain sadness in dark eyes
and full-grown
this woman appeared
world-wise
And while they wonder
who the father of her
latest offspring could be
I wonder where the
adorably incorrigible
little Tallie is-
that used to be
Skating in the Clouds
She ice skates, now in the clouds.
Her figure eights wow, all the heavenly crowds.
She is amazed as the crowd continues to grow.
New, to heaven, God pleases them all with additional,
sparkling white snow.
The new arrival, misses family and friends.
But she will see them here........when they
complete their earthly ends.
She does the axel, with ease, it does her heart, good.
The triple lutz wows all her neighbors in heaven hood!
She notices something small and dark, approaching her
with speed.
Madelyn jumps for joy, it is her long lost cocker spaniel,
Sparky, her pet who fulfilled her young girl needs.
Now, comes her husband, Air Show Jim, as young as the
day they met!
Madelyn is thrilled to be once again with her husband and
her furry pet.
This poem is no epic nor does it intend to be.
Just me, Pangie, hoping to skate one day in heaven with
my cousin Madelyn, most joyfully!
In memory of Madelyn McKay
Entered Heaven’s Gates
12/7/2021
12/10/2921
The Poetess Forever Gone
8/11/2023
Sun shines down through a cloudy aperture.
The writer, gone on a blessed,grand adventure!
Her table, chair, flowers, rug,wait for her.
Under moonlight, their soft cries,murmur.
It’s hard to believe that she is no more.
I see her swinging on angels’ bright doors.
Or running barefoot on celestial shores.
Shimmering beaches~ hers, forevermore.
Looking up at the stars in God’s heaven.
I still remember her, jumping rope, age seven.
And as she grew, loved this world the more.
Till God took her home, to His celestial shores!
In Memory of My Cousin
Alumnae of Poetry Soup
Missing you!
Cousin Time
So happy is a home where cousins meet;
their smiles and laughter make us feel upbeat,
while aunts and uncles know that life's complete
to watch their children share their love so sweet.
Like brothers, sisters, cousins are so neat;
they play for hours and later they retreat
to their own homes, but know they will repeat
that special time again when cousins meet.
Sandra M. Haight
~5th Place~
Contest: Personal Memories Monorhyme II
Sponsor: Laura Loo
Photo #2, My Niece, and Nephews
Judged: 06/16/2018
My cousin shared her wishes and dreams,
On our star gazing night, she whispered them so sweet
As a shooting star glided down from the sky,
She said, I wish ….. I wish…. all I wish are these tonight
Someday, I will marry a smart, rich and handsome guy
And have a grandiose banquet on my nuptial rite
We’ll be dancing like a lovely prince and princess ,
With all my wedding sponsors on their best suits and dresses
All in pink ,that’s the motif I will surely request.
She kept into her dreams as several years passed by,
Still searching for her prince charming who’s hard to find
Unconsciously going beyond the age to give birth to a child,
In a hurry at age of seventy, she took a rich ninety years old guy.
The wedding was held after a day or two,
The guy seated on his wheelchair with rheumatism on his toe
She headed slowly at the alter to accept his shaking hands,
Two nurses followed, so with sponsors dressed up in printed brown.
The highlight of the wedding rite started at once,
They held tightly with a nebulizers on the other hands,
But the words of oath, they took time to pronounce
False teeth were both misplaced and nowhere to be found.
Reception followed grandiosely in the guy’s mansion,
I saw many old men and women still eager to dance on the floor,
With hunched back, shaking knees, they twisted rock and roll
Then, sweet music played and my cousin danced with her groom.
But, we all wondered how did he stand alone?
He’s so heavy , I knew my cousin couldn’t help him at all,
With our great surprise, his nurse was at his side like his crutch
Everyone thought , he’s really a smart guy! Was he not?
Then, everyone followed them so happily on the spacious hall,
And in trio, they held each other so tight and moved like a fool.
Written: Sept. 15, 2012
First Place
Contest: My Cousin's Wedding (funny poem)
Contest Judged: 9/30/2012
Poet Sponsor: Joann Grisetti
When I was just a little girl
With mind as always, in a whirl
Me and my cousin, we would roam
Far, far away from my sweet home
We'd make our way to some rocks we knew
All covered by green moss, we two
Oh it was such a magic place
And left huge smiles upon my face
To us it was a fairyland
With imagination vast and grand
We both saw fairies, little elves too
Dancing daintily as they do
When that time came, we had to leave
Both our little hearts would grieve
We'd leave that haven, her and me
Our minds brim filled with memories
So we went back to normalcy
And though it made us both unhappy
We knew that soon we'd go back there
And see those we folk everywhere
Today I did stab,
an eraser so white, pure,
it did bleed blue ink.
A long, loving hug from a cousin
Is worth more than hours of hired therapy.
A cousin named Chaos have I (he’s not actually my cousin. He’s like my aunt’s stepson, but I guess I can still call him a cousin, right?)
There’s nothing that he will not try (like the day he let all the chickens loose from the coop and they were running like chickens with their heads cut off. Isn’t that an expression or something? Chaos is crazy like those chickens were)
Since he follows no rule (He laughs at me because I try to write perfectly metered limericks and he thinks everyone should just write free and BE free in all they do.)
He got kicked out of school (it was so funny. He set off the fire alarm and all the kids were running every which way, much like those chickens he let loose in his barnyard. Now he is saying he wants to become an anarchist.)
So to anarchy school he’ll apply!
Gosh, he’s right. This limerick sucks. It’s much more fun having no restrictions, just letting my thoughts go anywhere I want them to take me, kind of like stream of consciousness writing or something. Too bad I can’t be all surreal-like, then I might make it into the newfangled modern poetry magazines. Most people don’t even consider limericks to be real poems. DANG it, I feel another one coming on.
Cousin Chaos, I now do hear tell
That you’ve found a new school, so learn well
Your anarchy ways.
In limerick phase
I’ll be stuck while you give people hell.
Crap. Even trying to write like Chaos, I just can’t do it. I just keep conforming to rules of poetry forms like limerick. I just know my cousin will be laughing his chicken head off when he reads this. Yeah, the old chicken motif again. Always relating things together. So much for Chaos! I’m outta here.
Written chaotically last week sometime for contest of same name
Holiday dinners coming
Time to sit and feast
Moms afraid of infection
She worries about the yeast
Uncle Bobby wants some Turkey
He's picked out the wishing bone
If he is finally Lucky
He won't have to go home alone
Now the Turkey is boneless
The bread is not rising
The gravy is all lumpy
Grandma cukoo is smiling
Little jimmy is angry
He just wants to eat
But his cousin Elizabeth
Is taking toe jam off his feet
I should have stayed at home
With food that isn't gross
But then I wouldn't have seen
Grandpa riding the pot roast
He thought it was a Bronko
He made a big mistake
It never would have happened
If he had stayed awake
Lucky mom still had the ham
The roast had been destroyed
After it had been ridden
It was easy to avoid
Once the meal was over
I was nothing short of glad
I shouldn't tell you about Father
What he did was really bad
He went into the parlor
To let off some nasty gas
Sounded like an explosion
I laughed off my silly ass
My sad tale is now over
Every story has an end
If you don't really enjoy it
Be kind and just pretend
Christmas Dinner With Humor contest.
Written Dec 5 2012
If I ruled the world,
I'd round up all the men.
Send them to Afghanistan,
...And nuke the place again,
and again.
I'd collect and burn,
All the world's monies
And make sex slaves,
Of all the honeys
I would kill all the ugly ones
Well save one or two
So when I'm drunk I'll say
'**** you look good to scr3w'
I suppose you wanted everyone,
To live in peace on the earth?
But believe me, if I ruled
That would be all a myth
But I'm sure after fifty years
Of all that sex slaving
Everyone will be related
And there would be no misbehaving
Because I will make sure
Brother does not kill brother
And to women, the children
Will call all of them mother
To me, you guessed it
They will call me father
So I don't need riches or power
Or greed, just lust
I don't need gold or diamonds
Only women with a 42DD bust.......
**Requested by my Cousin Michelle**
R.I.P to the big cuz drew… Never did I think I would ever loose you…. Not this early in life…. I would do anything
to have you in my sight…. Them guys that did that stuff just aint right…. I mean they had me up crying…. They
had to be lying…. Its too soon for you to be up in the sky flying… I look to clouds up above… Wishing I can give
you one more hug… Push and shove… Never let you go… Cause I love you cousin just had to let you no….