Best Cahoots Poems
i stood looking outside
listening to the rain
with its long slender fingers
tap a tune against my window
squeegees in hand
i could see
the troops of drops
clean the air
for a clearer view
while on their descent
people
some walking
holding their umbrellas
others running
attempting to escape
the cruel barrage of
knocks to their heads
there are a few children
in their rainy day gear
locked and loaded
steady and ready
attacking the puddles
with a fierce offensive
crushing any and all puddles
dare question their authority
jumping and diminishing
the enemy ruthlessly
the children's joy
propels me to thoughts
of the gift ahead
a rainbow large
or maybe a double arc
fully colored vibrant
interrupted
my kettle
whistles
me over
meticulously
i proceed to prepare
my rainy day cocoa
in my neighborhood
it's a law
rain?
hot cocoa
cocoa in hand
i return to my show
the trees are soaked
the rain unrelenting
the plants forced
to bend under the
weight of heavy rain
all the tiny flyers
seek shelter
while birds
bomb dive
for their landing
worms however
are in their
full glory
out for their
unscheduled shower
later aliens
with lamps
shinning from
their foreheads
will gather
to pluck
worms
from the earth
poor worms
my daughters
will be glad
never having
liked crawlies
of any kind
i suppose
they would think
poor aliens
the rain now
is descending violently
apparently in cahoots
with the wind
but still no
thunder or lightning
this must be their
week off
a paid vacation
i gather
my cocoa only
warm and almost
finished
i decide to
bid the rain
a good night
i head
upstairs
for my
daily shower
Maurice Yvonne
September 12 2014
Rainy Day Contest
A poetess named Linda Alice Fowler
Chose the spirit animal owl for her
avatar and muse, and who
doesn’t worry ‘bout bird flu
with all her power, no not this prowler
True to herself and has keen intuition
If she appears in your dreams, pay her attention
It’s well-known symbolism
Embrace change with optimism
Owls can appear as protector’s or an omen
A night owl stays up and writes poetry
Makes POTD, and a great contest entry
Rotates neck to such degrees!
Linda Blairs? Nothing like these
An owl's genius, beyond elementary
Linda’s wise and so clever in her flight
The talent to guide others to the light
A unique voice, she toots
Her and I, we’re in cahoots!
You won’t see her on your way, she’s out of sight!
An owl can rotate there head up to 270 degrees.
After a wonderful late afternoon walk in the park,
my wife and I moseyed over to the Japanese Hibachi Grille for some dinner.
What we got into was some good old fashioned drama down at BeniHana...
You see, I got me a fetish for shiny cookware,
so as the patrons' eyes honed in on the iron chef
dicing up onions, shrimp, and chicken...
mine were busy fantasizing about concealing Ginsu knives
clankin' in the kitchen.
"Brew Silly began his routine with the hot fire volcano bit
atop the flat grille.
In the distraction, my sticky fingers began reactin',
slippin' utensils inside my zipper, for a thrill.
Things started heatin' up as folks were eating up;
Spatulas started flyin'!
Mushrooms were a fryin',
My conscience stopped trying...
tired of getting beaten up!
Now, if I told you I was lookin' at what was cookin'...
I'd be a lyin'.
I mean, I was really tryin',
but the devil had me by the klepto-hands...guiding me.
Riling me up.
He said, "Go for one of them Wok's! Do it now Big Dog!
Get yir rocks off! Knock yir socks off!
Quick man...sly like a fox, Hoss!"
My heart said, "No", but my head said, "OH HELL YES!"
Sadly, I was in cahoots with the devil,
bass mixed with treble,
trouble poundin' in my chest!
So guess what came next?-
I grabbed one of them big brass bitches,
signaled Jessie's ass with a quickness,
and started gunnin for the door!
Of course, my good hearted wife started whinin',
"Honey, I wasn't done, now what are we leavin' for?"
"Listen baby, I'll explain later.
Right now it's time to go!"
As we passed the pretty little hostess,
she banged the gong and said real fast,
"AHH, Tank-You Berry Much F'wor Cummean Fwolks!"
We jetted towards the park, but it was getting dark.
My legs began to fail. The cops were on our tail.
We tried to walk and play it off, but it was no use.
We should have stayed and ate our food,
and drank our brews with "BREWS!"
The pigs threw me to the ground,
then began to squeal and bark.
They tossed us in the County Jail,
twenty thousand bail...
____________FOR TAKIN' A WOK TO THE PARK!!!
~"True story ={WinK+Wink}
I hide in Grandma Thora's room.
A velvet and wood reserve,
forbidden to children.
Grandma's heavy, hunting feet
thunder over hardwood floors toward me.
Curled up tight- like a snake.,
praying my thumping chest doesn't climb
over her huge scolding voice,
and betray my hiding place.
Grandma Thora is in cahoots with God-
She is as scary as His commanding bible.
The book, that I didn't ask for, is my birthday gift.
I'm ashamed of my disappointment
that stepped into me when
I tore off the wrapping paper
and found only God's word.
King James in leather is not what I want.
I carve into the skin-thin title page
with a sharp tipped pen,
“Damn you! Go to Hell!”
God, I'm dead now for sure.
My sister and I have different personalities
Never alike, two peas from the same pod,
but not germinated for the same Winter crop.
We never argue over mundane trivialities.
I like halibut, but she always chooses cod,
and I prefer vacuuming; she loves to mop.
But there is only one topic we cannot discuss
Our political views caused too many disputes
We disagree on the qualities of a President
and had heated debates. Oh, how we did fuss!
When I said Trump was immoral and in cahoots
with crooks, and he was a stubborn old cuss.
She fired back that Biden was senile, much too old
and she didn't like Kamala, which made me sigh.
Round after round we boxed, in verbal objections.
She watched the numbers as voters were polled
and I wanted scissors to cut off Trump's red tie
and no more commercials for Presidential elections.
Finally, I said, "Our bickering is tearing us apart."
She agreed for the need to put an end to our feud.
We're both much happier, but once in a while
she'll mention his name, and I'll say, "Don't start!"
I'd never vote for a man who's crude and lewd.
I can't understand why she can't see that he's vile.
We'll never agree on which man is most deserving
or which one truly lives by America's Constitution.
We avoid politics when we come face to face.
But I know Trump is unfit, and is totally self-serving
Biden isn't perfect, but Trump started a revolution.
He made a mockery of the office. Such a disgrace.
Yes, I blame him for inciting the Capitol subversion
But didn't say a word to her so we'd keep the peace
Sometimes it's still difficult not to interject a belief
so we talk about taking a pleasant holiday excursion
perhaps to the Caribbean or to the isles of Greece.
I'm just glad that we found a way to stop the grief.
.
There once was a lawyer on the hook
For being in cahoots with the crook
The crook was set free
By making a plea
But the lawyer was hit by the book
.
Bulls in wooden shoots
Clowns and Cowboys in cahoots
Cowgirls in pink boots
Save Malaysia Today
S - Some time ago, there was a sovereign fund named 1MDB...
A - All too soon, there were mounting allegations of suspicious activities...
V - Various allegations hinted of serious financial and administrative irregularities..
E - Ere you know it, the hot potato that is 1MDB is fouling up the economy...
M - My country Malaysia today is a nation of highly stressed daily living….
A - All my countrymen are suffering from a drastic rise in the cost of living…
L - Lives everywhere are struggling to cope with a falling economy…
A - As the drastic price rise in raw petroleum has pushed up pricings..
Y - Yet the government saw fit to introduce after 1st April 2015 GST, a pervasive
6% sales tax …
S - Sure enough, consumer prices immediately spiralled upwards as GST is a
cumulative form of tax…
I - In fact, the high petroleum price and this new sales tax has effectively double
the cost of living..
A - All Malaysians are increasingly disenchanted with the top man in the political
office…
T - There is a most historic gathering today of politicians in an effort to save the
Malaysian nation..
O - One impossible gathering of leaders from the ruling political party in cahoots
with the opposition …
D - Demands were made through various speeches presented by all the political
bigwigs in attendance..
A - All were in agreement that illegal donations, GST and 1MDB were linked to the
top minister's silence …
Y - Yet to be seen, will this gathering and a Citizen Declaration be just the spark to
save Malaysia?
Well they done took away ma pension
whilst I waren’t payin no tention.
Never thought thet thar could happen,
Seems ma face they keep a slappin'.
Ah trusted all them folk thet said ah could,
ah took their word like they sed ah should,
but now ah see they jest a bunch a thieves,
Take all ya got and knock ya to yer knees.
Use ta was be you could tell a liar,
plain’s ya could the town crier,
Now they got sneakier ways,
from lots a practice these days.
Them banks and the government’s in cahoots.
Reckon they standin’ in each others boots.
Whisht ah’d a knowed they wuz gonna play those games
Ah’d a set much lower aims.. maybe like …Jesse James.
Done asked a lawyer onced bout business and ethics.
He laughed and said “Bob, business and ethics don’t mix!”
Never heered anybody say that right out loud…
Still laughin’ at me,.. he walked away proud.
Yep, maybe I’d a set much lower aims…
Reckon I’d a understood… Jesse James.
A girl was raped in a bus that night
By six men, all drunk, who had lost their minds
Ambrosia was the elixir of gods, it is said
But godlike men in this age aren’t born or made
Alcohol wrecks judgment, makes beasts out of men
Deeds under its influence have put us men to shame
Shops abound in our nation where alcohol is sold
The government till overflows when the weather turns cold
A corrupt force is tasked to uphold the country’s law
Incidents occurring on a daily basis expose this basic flaw
Fear of law is no deterrent for miscreants and crooks
The police prefer to look away; with them, they are in cahoots
But a girl still battles death today aided by a ventilator
Skewered with an iron rod that night, unending was her horror
Demonstrations against this shame were met with brutal force
Citizens showing solidarity were bludgeoned without remorse
The hand that wields the baton to protect civil society
Is now the hand that throttles free voice and liberty
Bad governance, we know is the bane of any nation
Bad policing and lawlessness is responsible for any country’s degeneration
Instead of upholding law and maintaining order
Law enforcers are subdued by their political masters
Whose lack of will to rein in the force given selfish political aspirations
Stems from a sense of indebtedness for furthering their ambitions
Burning state fuel at night they stalk and chase prey
Fleecing shady truckers and wheeler-dealers who operate in markets grey
This extortion by night on city road and state highway
Robs the state of much needed revenue and is an add-on to their pay
Similar incidents happen each day of the year and night
In night’s anonymous darkness or blatantly by daylight
With the force preoccupied in matters so vital
Who will protect our girls and control the crime spiral
The government of the day is callous to people’s concerns
Callous to a daughter’s fate on whom men on a bus took turns
I have no cell phone
I have no cable TV
How then is the Whitehouse?
Listening in on me?
Well Obama is in my shower
His singing well its getting louder
I think he’s spying on me
Or maybe Michelle’s around the corner
Now Obama has a great singing voice
He sings for the people
Trump evicts them, when lacking any rights
Fascists sure know are to make fake plights
Obama he is listening in
Nice that a president listens to his people
Trump should get out from under the steeple
His golden toilet is not from America
His Russian roots, and his senile boots
Do I have to say with who he is in cahoots’?
Fascists marching down the streets
Thank god they too are not in my shower
That would be the true abuse of Power
Sally found her hair was turning gray
Looking younger was what she did pray
Alas, hair kept graying
And her heart kept praying
Even though her mane was on display
She wasn’t too keen on the new hair dye
Still decided to give it a try
Weeks later, out came roots
Her hair was in cahoots
Glad she had a touch up to apply
Now that Sally has new hair color
Her hubby often gives a holler
He gets a brand new gal
One he likes to call pal
Because she doesn’t spend his last dollar
They come in many different sizes
Different colors, different cuts
All purebred from Poodle planet
No mixing of Martian mutts
Innocently enough we let them into our homes
Now with too many it is to little to late
We've been taken captive without even knowing
By Poodles from Outer Space
Soon, very soon to take over it all
Ruling the world of common man
Getting us to do their bidding at every call
Has all along been their dastardly plan
Leading us to believe that we are the Masters
But what is really behind the bark
And what's up with all the tail wagging
Just waiting it out while playing their cards
And the crazed frenzy in all of the yapping
That they do while roaming in packs
Is just giving away their location
So the Mother Ship knows where they are at
As it continues to circle our planet
In the unassuming shape of a Milk-Bone
The Alien Poodles are in cahoots with Purina
Google it, you'll see I'm not wrong
Years ago they first landed in France
Where quickly they blended in
From there is where they ventured out
Into all the major Continents
Now in every corner of the world
In all of its crooks and crannies
Saying hello to those in the know wherever they go
By their Planet's greeting...the sniffing of fanny
Yes, they are Poodles from Outer Space
So toss that dog a bone
If you ever wonder who is in charge
And who it is that's owned...
I have 3 Poodles that own me...
I swear they're Aliens...
Within the silence that's witching hour
And the sweet smile of....dawns crack
Two very giggly bunnies
Lacking inhibitions
Stole within the moon
And stars....To roll within a sack
Birthday suits
Within cahoots
Not a carrot to hide said pride
Beneath one itchy blanket
Creeping side by side
Both had fluffy heads
And very fuzzy tails
They giggled down the garden end
Avoiding, shovels, spades and snails
It was fun, they felt rebellious they hushed each other so
Fearful of the stealth night fox
(Spirits high)
Yet kept their hushes low
They then did as most bunnies do
As almost a profession
Silent smiling adoringly
A fantastic little session
After whiles and giggles they
Very
Silently
Rose.....
Bad bunnyette kissed his cheek
He pecked her on the nose
Back down the rabbit hole, two cheeky little grins
Joyous of their secret
Of where on earth.... they'de been! !
Ponytails and blue jeans
Sat at Papaw's knee,
Watching as he whittled
On old branches from a tree.
And while he talked of cowboys
And big old Texas ranches,
He trimmed away the rough spots,
While I dreamed of pony dances.
A wild stick horse remuda
Began to run and play,
With every loving stroke,
As he peeled the bark away.
Using his "Old Timer"
And carving in my brand,
The best that he could find
And cut and shape with his own hand.
Now, each one of them was special,
And I felt I was too,
As they kicked up dust behind
This cowgirl buckaroo.
With reins of pink hair ribbon,
Shoe strings and baling twine,
There was "Buckin' Birch" and "Oakie,"
And "Ole Sticky" made of pine,
"Sassafras," and "Blackjack,"
"Willow," "Blaze," and "Scat,"
I never did corral 'em --
I just left 'em where they sat.
But next mornin', on the front porch,
'stead of roamin' wild and free,
They'd found their hitchin' rail,
‘cause Papaw lined 'em up for me.
Along our trails together
There were many lessons learned,
Like bein' a cowboy through and through
Is something that you earn
We'd partner up together,
And team up in cahoots,
Once he defied my Mama,
Bought me red cowboy boots.
And often, when I wondered
What to do on down the road,
He'd always tell me, "little girl,
When you get there you will know,"
Sometimes you have to let things go,
Sometimes you stand and fight,
And anything worth doin',
Is still worth doin' right.
With my wild stick horse remuda,
We rode the range for miles,
I knew I'd won my Papaw's heart
By the way he'd laugh and smile,
I still have his sweat-stained Stetson,
His boots, and his old knife,
Sometimes I take them out
Just to measure up my life.
And hold him closer to my heart,
And know I have to try,
To live up to the honor
Of the wonder-days gone by.
On my stick horse remuda,
I learned the cowboy way,
I’d give up everything I own
To ride with him today.
My wild stick horse remuda
Was quite the varied band,
Born and bred with me in mind
And trained by his own hand.
I’m longing for the legends,
And the way we used to roam,
With my wild stick horse remuda,
And the man that we called "Home."