Best Belly Laugh Poems
Standing at the plate there is no doubt
The pitcher is determined to strike me out
He squints to see the catcher's glove
Then spins and swings his arms above
The ball scorches a path across the plate
I feebly swing six days too late
The umpire acts like he's having fun
When he bellowed out, "STRIKE ONE!"
Again the pitcher stares at the dish
While I silently make a wish
Not a big request at all
I only want to hit the ball
The pitcher rears back and throws a curve
The ball starts over there and then begins to swerve
I miss so badly I hit the ground
I can hear people laughing all the way back in town
The umpire is having a belly laugh too
As he holds up two fingers and shouts, "STRIKE TWO!"
The pitcher is doing a cocky dance
While behind the mound hiking up his pants
He looks smug and I hear the catcher say,
"Give it up boy, he's putting you away."
The pitcher shakes off signs 1,2,3
He's saving a special pitch just for me
He peeks out over the top of his glove
I can tell that this strikeout he already loves
He winds up like a crazy corkscrew
Slinging a pitch he has never threw
I close my eyes and jerk the bat
Somehow the bat finds where the ball is at
The crack was the loudest ever heard
Nowhere in this stadium can you hear a word
You can hear a pin drop in this place
Nary a smile on any face
You would think that ball was launched into outer space
But alas, it is just a dribbler to first base
I feel I should get out of town
When I saw the other team high-fiving on the mound
Dad said, "Don't worry son, we'll get them next time champ."
After all it was just my first bat at Little League camp!
The Christmas when Santa got Fat
Kris Kringle rubbed his belly; he was feeling really hungry indeed
Mrs Claus had put him on a diet of what he felt was chicken feed
Brussel Sprouts and Lima Beans and lots of Spinach Green
Life’s unfair when you’re Santa Claus and still your wife is mean.
So what if he‘d piled on the pounds and his belly was very round
He could surely fit down any chimney without the slightest sound
Oh well he thought its Christmas eve , children would put out some snacks
Milk, Cookies and Candy Cane would put his tummy back on track.
He got into his silver sleigh and heaved a mighty sigh
Rudolph, , Prancer and Vixen waved to Mrs. Claus goodbye
He was really very hungry the clouds had begun to look like food
Then again if he asked his reindeers, they would be so very rude
They all agreed with Mrs. Claus, Santa was rounder in his seat
They hadn’t even let him carry his goodie bag of sweets
The last place on his list was the house of Jill and Joe
Aha he fit down the chimney and he heaved a mighty ho
He placed the doll and toy train right underneath the tree
He saw the milk and cookies and rubbed his hands in glee
He ate and ate the yummy snacks till his pants felt very tight
Cheerful now he began to feel Christmas Eve was a jolly good night
They he tried to climb up the chimney but heavens he couldn’t get back
He wriggled and squirmed but had to agree his middle was very fat
Rudolph, Prancer , Vixen he very softly called
You’ll have to pull get me out of here I can’t seem to move at all
The reindeers whinnied suspiciously what Santa felt was a nasty laugh
He now agreed sheepishly why his food had been cut down to half
They heaved and with a mighty yell, Santa came flying out
It was a good thing it was still midnight for no one had heard him shout
When they reached back home the reindeers gleefully recounted the tale
When he saw Mrs. Claus’ angry face, he began to get very pale
But when she gave her sweet belly laugh, Santa heaved a sigh of relief
It’s a good thing they got you out my dear before they thought you were a thief!
It’s a stricter diet for you this year before you revisit Jane and Joe
Or else instead of the chimney, you will have to ask to use the door!.
I attempt to make other people smile
Melancholy days - forget them for a while!
A real belly laugh is good for your soul
Keep on writing humour is my goal
Even on days when I’m feeling down
Find me in my sexy dressing gown
Often I'm writing late into the night
Limericks can create such delight
Knowing my words may make folk cry
Leaving tears of laughter in their eye
A giggle day keeps depression at bay
Using my wit keeps the blues away
Given some time I’ll write a line or two
Hope my poems stop you from feeling blue
Word play poetry contest
Sponsored by Bobby May
1/29/19
Getting high is a state of mind:
and this altered sense
of reality
can be achieved;
without chemicals.
Life itself offers a natural high
free for the taking.
Running injects a runner's high:
a euphoric, feel-good
burst of energy.
And a belly laugh is
like shooting up:
instantly lifting your spirits
and leaving you feeling giddy.
Meditation calms you down safely,
helping you find your balance;
while taking you on an inner voyage
of self-discovery.
Music touches your soul
and your heart
unlike anything else can.
And yet, fueled by adrenaline,
dance can take you to another level.
Nature's natural, fragrant intoxicants,
such as lilac or lavender,
give your mind a sense of well-being.
So, if you want to feel high,
why not give life a try?
Ha Ha Ha - Cartoon- funny
Giggle - Valley Girl- Preppy
LOL - Texting- Hilarious
Snicker- Your worst enemy- Flippant
Snort- Pig- Belly laugh
Chuckle- Manley Man- Sportive
Howl- To much alcohol- Cracked up
Hew Haw- Country Girl- Tickled
Teehee- Sophisticated Women- Amusing
Ho Ho Ho- Santa Clause- Jolly
Horselaugh- Mr. Ed- Smirk
Hoot- Best Buddy- Grin
Died Laughing- Bills are due- Breathlessness
Guffaw- Mother-in-law died- Just kidding
No matter how we laugh or what we laugh at
it's good for the soul.
4/19/2015 Contest sponsored by: Thomas Martin 'Humorous Poetry'
T Reams 1st Place
cat, dog, food, humor, mom, pain, summer,
I tripped over feet
My shoe laces both came undone
Slid in my 'spilled' milk
Cut my finger on broke glass
My blood now was mixed in milk!
I sat on a chair
It was much too low for me
Table top held my chin
Knees folded I knelt down below
My neck got cramped looking up!
Taking a 'soap' soak
I washed my hair in 'suds' water
Forgot to rinse 'wash'
Let the bath drain of cold water
Had to take a shower too!
I bit my finger
A huge delicious apple
Choked on pieces bitten
And swallowed a broken tooth
It left an empty hole then!
Pits are wicked on teeth
Cherry pits the worse for wear
Three cherries at once
Eaten you choke on a pit
If swallowed you then will die!
Pepper makes a sneeze
Then coughing up of chewed food
Follows up the throat
Adding 'more' to the food plate
Appetite all lost!
Close your eyes and wish
Once upon a time like 'right' now
My mom told me so
Magic will make a wish come true
Then I learnt she fibs white lies!
Cats and dogs skip rope
Jumping around up and down
When the double-dutch stops
Cat and dog hair flies about
Then the fight is done double time!
Touring on my bike
I flipped ' head over heels' and rolled
Down grassy culverts below
Upon a stinking skunk hole
Startling the homeowners there!
Belly laugh causes much gas
That builds wind into a toot
Relieving more pain
Reaching a higher stink bomb
That calls more laughter!
My peaches are very ripe
I squeezed one to check them out
Grab'n napkins and bowl
When bitten into juices pour
Sliding stickily down my chin!
Corn on the cob needs
Melted butter and wood toothpicks
Small bits catch in teeth
Cob takes two hands for chomping
All the kernels in a row!
Shaved cabbage ' coleslaw'
Sliced hamburger buns with meat
Chopped onions with sauces
Causes gall bladder heartburn pain
Trapped gasses giving 'piglet' shame!
We have a hedgehog in the garden
Whose feels that spring is in the air
Making one hell of a noise
Hoping a mate will care
Think he is getting frustrated
Cos no answer call he hears
Round and round he shuffles
Hope he doesn’t spear
His manhood on those spikes of his
That would be a sin
Especially as he’s in love with my boot remover
That looks like him
He has been making advances
Well in fact I’ts more than that
Don’t think it’s scratched his itches though
Cos now he is looking at the cat.
Hope this ditty makes you smile
Cos a smile is better than a pill
But a down right belly laugh
Is the best medicine of all
Blissfully, Blessed
Blithely, Brilliant
Blatantly, Brave
Bipedal, Biographer
Bilingual, Bibliolater
Beyond, Blasphemy
Before, Bespectacled
Benevolent, Benignity
Bending, Belly laugh
Betraying, Beelzebub
Betrothed, Beau
Bearded, Baritone
Barbate, Banjoist
Baptized, Balladeer
Badinage, Banter
I have always been curious about people from Kurdistan
I wonder why they are called kurds
I wonder when the kurds would become keese
Just like curd becomes cheese
I wonder if birds are called “birds” because they come from “Birdistan”…..
Okay, that kurd-bird joke one time never went down well
One audience I entertained transitioned from swelling to swearing
The agitated audience looked at each other, left and right
The bird joke got me pelted and unhired, now I'm a fly-by-night comic
The joke was inspired by a 12 year kid I once knew, nicknamed “Talk shop”
He used to hang around the market stands and chatted nonstop
The lad knew almost all of the countries with syllables ending with “–stan”
He bragged about Kazakhstan, Tajikstan, Uzbekistan, with the “stans” he was never done
The smart-****’s Turkistan questions hit me like a slap
Unrelentingly he tested me to spot Manhattan on the map
I totally lost my geography to the kids embarrassing pressure
The kid burst into a belly laugh when my finger hovered over Asia
In trying to change the subject, I asked him about the story of Tristan
I was zipped into silence when he told me stick to geography and not romance
I asked the kid what his real name was, and how he got an extra memory chip
He said if he taught me how, the conversation would flip
And then he revealed what his real name was with a “My name is Stan, duh!”
A felt relieved, as adult dumbness left my shoulder
I bet you would know every country and its geographical location
If it was made up of some weird syllables sneaking up on your name
The cocky kid asked me to test him on anything
I went spiritual, a subject the kid probably had no grip on
I asked him why we confess to a priest, if God can directly hear us pray
He said “so that we can have an eye witness on judgment day”
I tried to get rid of the boy by pretending to be bored
But I let the boy stay, when he told me that I would miss him one day when I get old
My grandma was not, at all, an attractive woman
She was, as a matter of fact, rather common
She was short and broad, which made her obese
But, she was never reluctant to say her piece
Her face was chiseled like the Egyptian sphinx
From her long, braided hair she combed out the kinks
She was blinded during childhood in her left eye
Was, to my knowledge, never known to tell a lie
As I recall, there was not a real tooth in her head
At meals, she always laid out a handsome spread
She was the best granny a kid could ever have
Told me many things that gave me a belly laugh
Whatever she lacked in physical appearance
She made up for from her years of experience
All in all, she was quite a formidable dame
In our community everyone knew her name
Though when I was young, she seemed rather old
My sweet grandma had a heart of pure gold.
Laughter's healthy, contagious, and brightens your day.
It's pun that's a groaner or joke that's risque.
It's a belly laugh, horse laugh, or laugh like a loon
At a comic strip. slapstick or clown or cartoon.
Laughter's chuckles and chortles, a snicker or snort.
It's a humorist's quip or a jester at court.
It's amusement that's droll or the last laugh that's best
Or a rib-tickler, knee-slapper, jape, or a jest.
Laughter's mirth and hilarity, wisecracks or wags.
It's a yuk or a cackle and zingers and gags.
You can giggle, guffaw, or can laugh up your sleeve,
Bust a gut, or with levity tension relieve.
Laughter's wit that's impromptu or monologue planned.
Its a sitcom with punchlines and laughter that's canned.
It's a pie in the face or a pratfall or prank
And comedian's laugh all the way to the bank.
Laughter our bodies natural medicine
A wondrous gift we humans possess
Helps alleviate stifled woes
Releases life’s stress
Laughing relaxes your whole being
Life’s worries put temporarily aside
Therapy for heart and soul
That no amount of money can buy
Laughter unites us together
Breaks down our barriers and fears
It’s spontaneous , playful and infectious
Judgements and differences disappear
Spirits uplifted with merriment
Throughout laughter time
Leaving all that negativity
Tension and troubles behind
Hearty, explosive, raucous laughter
Purest medicine for the human soul
Laugh long, hard and loud
Free inhibitions , abandon a little self control!
Surround yourself with positive people
Have a truly hearty laugh
Loosen up and let your hair down ( if you have it!!)
Just enjoy a belly laugh and a half!!!
This is me yelling, "HA!
No matter how I feel,
today my laughter,
satan will not steal!
Laughter is healthy,
that's what I've been told.
I'll start with just a giggle,
and then get really bold.
I'll try a quiet chuckle,
and then a chortle or two.
But listen to me now,
because I'm not at all through!
A good belly laugh
is what my body needs.
I'll let it ripple like a tickle.
Ah! That feels so good indeed!
"What soap is to the body,
laughter is to the soul."
That's an old Yiddish proverb,
I long ago was told.
Laughter's like medicine.
It works faster than a pill.
And when you are in pain,
humor just might fill the bill.
Stress busters are the humorists
God puts in our lives.
Because He knew through them,
humor refreshes and revives.
I'll watch an "I love Lucy" rerun,
or, read the comics page.
And anything that makes me laugh,
will be my go-to-stage.
The heart, the brain, the lungs,
need stimulation, too.
Aerobics for my insides,
they'll respond with, "I Love You."
Now my body, mind and Soul,
laughs with me and starts to glow.
It's just what the doctor ordered.
So what are you waiting for?
Let loose a belly laugh or two,
and let me hear you ROAR!
stepp'n down from presidency ~Kamala, de facto nominee
Kamala means lotus flower~accent on Ka,' Zen power
top of the ticket changed~ but the message remains the same
fight for freedom at fifty-nine ~her belly laugh we love, smiles of sunshine
here to stay~as prosecutor put predators away
potential Harris picks~for vice president as time ticks
I smiled when reflecting last smile,
Authentic aching belly laugh
Contemplating its been a while
Evident on a photograph
Type of smile, aches across your face
Forced upon smile is without grace,
Genuine smiles reflect the soul
Spontaneous minus control ~
When I smiled, aching belly smile
Reflecting authentic laugh last,
Evident on a while its been
Contemplating a photograph
When you're selected to partake,
Practice to ensure it's not fake