Best Anyhow Poems


A Tribute To a Major Appliance

Sub-titled: What’s in YOUR Fridge?

Please allow me to introduce myself:
My name is Ms. Fridge A. Daire
I stand tall among my lesser cohorts
and MOST of them really look up to me

However, I have two problems:
First, I’m FED UP with my owner
He's always opening my door
reaching deep inside (Oooh yeah!)
helping himself to my goodies
without EVER cleaning me out
or scrubbing me from top to bottom
Doesn’t he know a woman has NEEDS?

Then there’s that stupid stove next to me
who’s constantly flirting and making passes
Says he wants to ‘warm me up’ and ‘defrost’ me
bragging that I’ve ‘got the hots’ for him
which absolutely makes my Freon boil!
Of course, I always give him the cold shoulder
by freezing him with my famous icy stare
and responding, “Simmer down Four-Eyes"
or “I don’t date shorter appliances"
But he’s always cooking up something else...

So I asked my owner to move me to another spot
He said he would if I wasn’t so heavy...HEAVY?
What kind of thing is THAT to say to a lady?
He also claims there’s no other place to plug me
PLUG me? Who does he think I am anyhow?
I found it quite crude and vulgar! ANYWAY...
I suggested an extension cord and he blew a fuse!
Geez, no wonder he’s still single...

Premium Member When I Love Thee

 I LOVE THEE
I am no voluptuous beauty nor do I live a life of purity
I can only say: I love wholeheartedly with all I am so truthfully

I keep my heart open though it gets hurt so often
I avoid to be irate as I know love changes the heart rate..

Guys tried to coo and woo, they say words as for "only you"
Yet, hard to believe it is true as I see some untrue

I give chances as my heart marks with tact entrances
I learned from various instances looking man in romances

In places where rules impede, two persons who wants to bid
Not of money but of affection, in them must be determination

I love thee not of what you have…
Not even of who you are but to how you are to me…

If I love you, don't tell me much what to do…
As me, myself will show you, I am that real and true..

Yes, I am liked by many but tell you what:
I don't like this honey nor am I proud of it in anyway
One is enough to make me stay

Stand with me through it all, I give my best not to fall
My name your sweetest call echoing in every wall..

Hold me firm yet dear; allow me to move closely
We'll make it anyhow, treading smoothly on flows...

We are strong, aren't we? No one moving alone
Together we'll face phases in tune, though there will dunes..
________________________________________________________

© OLIVE ELOISA D. GUILLERMO
3:25 pm, 07/13/2013

***CONTEST: ANY POEM GOES #13
SPONSOR: POET DESTROYER
8TH PLACE (TO GOD BE THE GREATEST GLORY)

***Sponsor	SKAT A
Contest Name	Any Old Poem #5 
4th place
Form: Ballad

Premium Member Love Potion

Welcome my dear
what can I do you for? 
I offer spells and charms galore 

A love philter you say? 
I know just the thing
When I am done
to you he’ll cling 

When sun takes its bow at the close of day
In a place where ocean waves meet bay
Let curtains close to mortal sight 
Behold
desire’s flame ignites

Employing drift wood
in the sand
Inscribe his name 
Feel heart expand 
Stir 3 times in clockwise motion 
Whilst we brew this lover’s potion 

A drop of blood
a strand of hair
Will free you soon from your despair 
You’ll feel the warmth spread through your 
being
You’ll both find this most agreeing 

Feel wind’s breath upon thy cheek
Sacred words you now must Speak 
Tell the Earth, the wind and fire
Inform the water of your desire

Let Cupid’s compass spin once more 
For His benevolence you must implore 
East and south 
West and north 
Spirits of seduction I call thee forth 

Hark to the rhythm of the drums that pound
Thrashing out the heart beat 
of the one to be spell bound 

Whilst the bonfire slowly dies
Images flash before his eyes
Untie him now
He will behave
I have cast a spell
He is enslaved 

Hit him now with passion dart
And then my dear you have done your part 
All that’s remains is for you both 
To gulp it down 
Let’s have a toast

Before you do you will pay me now
There are others who need me anyhow
His Affection will grow like weeds 
I must away now to do good deeds 

Will my enchantment stand the test of time? 
I hear you ask, Well they’ll be just fine 
Sleep now children in my domain 
I promised to free you from your pain
Their lust will last eternally
Till I dump their bodies in the sea 



                17th October 2019
          For love potion poetry contest
            Sponsored By Julia Ward
Form: Rhyme


Close the Curtains

she half-heartedly stares
out the window, as if a mirror

the tree stands there
fragile and frail
uprooted, ready to snap
beneath the weight of winter
icicles hang like daggers to a heart

she sees no beauty in this
but she never liked her anyhow

she closes her eyes
and sees him there
as if an old photo
she traces the edges

she remembers the blush
beneath his touch
and sees it as it splashes
early morning skies

she knows there is no warmth
from sun beneath winters wrath
it unattainable like his heart

she realizes he never loved her
he can't, he doesn't know how

she glances towards the mirror
as if staring out the window
and sees the same 
she sees no beauty in this
but she never liked her anyhow

Premium Member Cruise To Alaska

The trip was a riot of color,
It brings a myriad of queries,
Fantastic tales of utter darkness,
Views' visible roots were explored. 

Mainsail surges,
pungent froth carried wave tips while,
blast swings moaning openly.

superb mountains,
Convey streams into streaming rivers,
Down slants shrouded in woods.

And the majesty of the stars,
Is confronted every morning,
Under soft white clouds,
is with each foot I set down.

I relish the quiet of the sound,
how each slant embraces,
the still raw bay.

Home to unglaciated cervids,
Gnawing animals and polar bears,
Willow grouse, deer,
Also, the renowned Chinook Salmon.

More genuine than the Arctic flow,
Afar-off state refuted,
In both word and deed,
Anyhow of these ever tender wishes.

Atop mottled strands,
I let my emotions air dry,
Orange tulips were selected,
I regained faith; I can fly.

5Th Place Contest Winner

Written: June 18, 2022

2022 Poetry Marathon Mile 3 Poetry Contest
Sponsored by: Mark Toney
© Sotto Poet  Create an image from this poem.

Premium Member A Poet's Pledge

I will release no rhyme
Before its time.
No limerick, ode, haiku, or sonnet
Will 'scape from 'neath
My poet's bonnet
'til it be trimmed, and tamed, and non-aggressive,
Or overripe with verbiage
Or punctuation too excessive.

I will not break
This pledge I take,
Cruel critics' barbs though I endure.
My verse I'll brace with style and grace
Until my place in poetry's secure.
Of course, should "laureate" become my haunt, too,
I'll release anywhere,
And anyhow,
And anytime I damn well want to.
Form: Rhyme


Premium Member I'Ll Never Tell You Goodbye

I'll never tell you goodbye

You might think, 
I've grown tired of you...
You might think, 
you're getting old...

You might think 
your beauty's faded...
You're not some antique 
that's bought and sold...

Bridge
Even if you forget my name,
Everything will stay the same
Isn't that what we promised in our vow?
Even if you say that we are through,
doesn't mean I'm giving up on you
I could never do that anyhow!

Chorus
I need you to believe,
to believe in love
I'll never, ever leave,
I'll never break your trust
I'm never going to change
my feelings for you
You don't have to worry,
there's nothing you need to do
I'll never tell you goodbye
I'll never tell you goodbye


You may have,
gained a few pounds,
but, you're always 
beautiful to me...

Better get used to me 
being around,
'cause it's impossible,
for me to leave

Bridge
Even if you forget my name,
Everything will stay the same
Isn't that what we promised in our vow?
Even if you say that we are through,
doesn't mean I'm giving up on you
I could never do that anyhow!

Chorus
I need you to believe,
to believe in love
I'll never, ever leave,
I'll never break your trust
I'm never going to change
my feelings for you
You don't have to worry,
there's nothing you need to do
I'll never tell you goodbye
I'll never tell you goodbye

I'll never tell you goodbye
I'll never tell you goodbye
repeat fade

John Derek Hamilton
January 19,2018
Form: Lyric

The Worry Dolls

There is a tiny box of dolls
On the shelf by my bed
Each doll is for one worry that
May swirl inside my head

The box was given to me by
A friend, whom I adore
It started me to wondering
Just what is Worry for?

Does it serve any function as 
I purpose through each day?
Will it relieve my deepest pain
Or guide me on my way?

Can it lesson my misery 
Would it minimize strife?
And, will it add one single hour
To the end of my life?

The answer to my question is
Of course, "NO", it cannot!
So, Worry has no place in me
No victory it's wrought

The dolls-- I'll keep them anyhow
And use them differently
I'm sure my good friend wouldn't mind
A new idea, you see:

I'll pluck each miniature doll
From its box every night
And thank the Lord for giving me
A more eternal sight

Yes, with each petite figure I
Shall count one blessing too
And pray before I sleep that He'll
Make anxious hearts like new!
Form: Quatrain

Premium Member Chloee and Reginald the Stand Down Dachshund Comedians

One

Chloee? Yes Reginald! 
Why do they call us Dachshunds, Wiener Dogs?
Maybe they call you a Wiener Reginald!
You cut me off at the legs with that one Chloee!

Two

Chloee? Yes Reginald! Have you ever smelled mothballs.
No Reginald it's too difficult to spread their tiny legs.
My that was a low blow Chloee. You wish Reginald, you wish!

Three

Reginald? Yes Chloee! I was at the park with my owner playing
Frisbee. As I watched the Frisbee I wondered why it was getting 
bigger and bigger as it came towards me than it hit me.

Four

Chloee? Yes Reginald!
I was just lying down in the park the other day watching a Labrador 
chasing his tail an' I thought ain't that amazing how easily amused 
Labradors are! Then I realized I was watching the Labrador chase his tail.

Five

Reginald? Yes Chloee! I've written a poem it goes like this.
"Roses are red. Violets are blue. Some poems rhyme. And some don't!"

Six

Chloee? Yes Reginald! I was at a restaurant, I ordered a chicken sandwich, 
but I don’t think the waitress understood me. Because she said,
“How would you like your eggs?” So I tried to answer her anyhow. I said, 
“Incubated! And then raised, and then beheaded, and then plucked, 
and then cut up, and then put onto a grill, and then put onto a bun. 
Damn! It’s gonna take a while. I don’t have time. Scrambled!”

The Finale

A Dachshund walks under a bar. I mean walks into a bar. Goes to the
bar and sits down. Asks the bartender "can I have a Budweiser Light 
Beer" the bartender serves him and informs him "that will be seven dollars".
The Dachshund pays. The bartender keeps looking at the Dachshund. 
Finally the Dachshund yells "What?" The bartender explains "no I'm 
sorry we just never get Dachshunds in this bar." The Dachshund replies 
"I'm not surprised...at seven dollars for a beer..."

The Encore

Reginald? Yes Chloee! When you cut your nails, do you file them?
Yes Chloee as a matter of fact I do! Pity! I just throw mine out!

 Curtains!
01~10~2015
Sponsor: rob carmack
Contest: Daschunds
Form: Burlesque

But This Day Is Mine

But this Day is Mine!

 Joyfully I seize this new promising day,
along with whatever comes my way.
With God’s help, I’ll make it the best one ever,
putting my best foot forward with every measure.
I’m singing a new song, dancing a new dance,
doing things differently willing to take a chance.

Soaking up the sun’s energy from east to west,
it’s time to enjoy this life to the fullest.
Loving like crazy and wishing on a rainbow,
no more reserving happiness for tomorrow.
It’s about maximizing the here and now,
for tomorrow is not promised to anyone anyhow.

So I stake my claim – this blessed day is mine;
and I’m not wasting any more precious time.
Like a radiant super star I will shine,  
leaping to the very front of the line.
Here’s a toast to doing it the best way…
let’s celebrate and live life today!

06-04-2015

Contest:      Any Old Poem #9 
Sponsor:     SKAT A
Placement:  3rd

Tis the Irish In Me...

You'll not see determination
like it...

this spirit sailed across
seven seas...

even as a child I fondly
recall it...

I knew I was different...
for what I believe...

for instance rich kids
down the road for their
Christmas a trampoline
they received...

they refused me entry...
so I took to hills...
walked off all disharmony...

whilst up there I found a 
bog in it a dead cow lodged...

this cow bloated like any
fair ground balloon could be...

so I climbed aboard her and 
I bounced all day...

cost me nothing my soul 
in tact...

...thinking back...lucky
the old cow didn't burst
or crack...

it's the universe you see
the higher power understands
watches over me...

I often think of that day...
the spirit of the poor...
is rich...

Where there is a will there
is a way.

anyhow those same kids
they got tired of jumpin
up and down...

so they came to our house
we teamed up played rugby
instead...

for I knew from an early age
as young as five it is not t'ings
that bring fulfillment...

it is other people and love that
bring us this full of life...that we
feel inside...

Tis the Irish in me...
this spirit I believe...

the spirit that sailed
seven seas

...the spirit from above
Tis the Irish in me...
Form: Lyric

Premium Member Existence

From time to time I wonder if
It’s truly worth the ride
To live this life I’ve been given
Or trade it for one goodbye…

What good are all these memories, 
Wishful thoughts and dreams 
When the longer I crawl the farther I fall
From blue skies to cold, dark seas?

When they say we should be expanding
Outward towards the stars,
Connecting like particles and molecules 
Near and far.  

And yet here I stand a ‘waiting
The rain to wash me clean
Wondering when the sky is clear 
Will my existence be worth anything?

Does it matter that I’ve loved 
And lost, the battles I have waged 
From childhood tears to present fears
Of a cold, dark, muddy grave?

Will anyone remember 
A hundred years from now
Or even read these words composed
As if they matter anyhow? 

I suspect not a speck of dust or grain 
Of sand will anyone care 
That I lived, breathed, walked, talked, laughed, cryed 
And dared.

To climb the peak of Mount Impossible  
And swim the Seas of Sad Goodbyes;
To race the winds of wishful dreams
And time while flying bye.  

What will become of my travels around  
This tiny blue ball in space
And everyone I’ve ever known – 
Every sad and smiling face? 

And who’ll recite this poem once more 
And wonder, “Who was he?” 
When I’ve turned to dust as we all must 
Return back to the sea.       

Of mother earth and universe 
Womb of One and All
While I wonder sometimes who will find
I existed once and for all.
Form: Rhyme

Witch and Warlock

The warlock said to the witch,
Man, ain't it grand living large like Oz,
being bigly Emerald City rich
The witch crowed back,
I get paid good for giving speeches
that have no policy incantation glitch
The warlock laughed hard and long,
then chortled with maniacal glee:
I like the way you got a huge fee
for selling that "Deal Me In" dirge song
The witch returned the faint praise
with a piercing scowl and a sinister smile
You got those lemmings running thru a maze,
chasing your tale that it's all rigged anyhow
The warlock started getting miffed,
and his hair began to burn with an orange glow
He mockingly said, Endora, all the polls show
that you're a walking political gift
The witch angrily retorted: What spell did you use
to make yourself become 50 feet tall
Oh yeah, that's right. Should Humpty Dumpty lose,
it won't be much of a fall off that stupid wall
The warlock let out a sigh, and said:
You know we have to spit venom
at each other on the campaign stump
That's just how it is, and has to be
The witch let out a sigh too, and said:
Since our youthful days of wearing denim,
it's something we can't tell the voting chumps
That we're really friends, you and me
Then they both hugged each other,
and said goodbye to one another privately
The witch winked at the warlock, and cackled this:
No matter who wins,
I'm offering well wishes to you
So don't forget to send me a mean tweet
The warlock nodded back at the witch, and bellowed this:
Once the results are in,
I'll reply with well wishes too
But of course, don't you forget to delete

Card Houses

you build high your dreams
with these card houses
as you stack them against walls

yet your eyes are closed
to life, so how can you see
what it is you hold?

you think you hold all the aces
in those battered fists of yours?
(be careful of the winds)
they may come tumbling down

care to gamble,
take a chance?

I can tell you
before you place your bet
the deck's not full
it never really is
it's just a game
nothing more
nothing less
and you can never win

go ahead ante up
the stakes are high
when the pots full of fire
just be careful of the winds
they may huff and puff
and blow your house down

it was never balanced anyhow
you just never saw

Premium Member Ole Brownie (P1)

“Ole Brownie”

The meanest and the best,
Proven among the rest,
My dog in Arkansas, pope county,
I present, ole Brownie,

With first cold front,
Arkansans begin the hunt,
Razorback hogs,
with their dogs,

Now my dog Brownie,
Meanest hog dog in pope county,
A sight to see,
Even growls at me,

A heinz fifty seven,
Comes number seven of the eleven,
Impossible to see,
His pedigree,

Though no pedigree,
Visibly  plain to see,
He was the dog for me,
By my shout of glee,
When he was given to me,

He was a handsome dog,
Though he loved to hog,
Part red bone hound,
Mixed with feist clown,
Would fight anything around,

Twas very plain he wasn’t a coward,
With teeth bared,
Who’s hoss or boss,
At any cost,
Often declared,
When disputes were aired,

Ain’t no fibbing,
Ears torn to ribbons,
His ears` he had sacrifices,
To his scrapping vice,
Anyhow, to finish my story,
Bout my dog of glory, ©.( “Razorback Hog Hunt”)

9-27-09 johnmosesfreeman@yahoo.com

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