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Kelly Crenshaw
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Heartbreak

Blog Posted by Kelly Crenshaw: 7/21/2016 9:55:00 PM

Two months ago, I lost one of my sons. Out of four, he was the second youngest. 36 years old. I still have no words, yet here I sit typing. Numb. Yet I need to tell about this boy. I have tell these few things. If there ever was a man with the heart of a son, John was that guy. I sure suk as a dad, and been at times a horrible example but John always has doted over me, and tried to help. When my mind would wander, he would always gently try to guide me back to reality. Both of us are somewhat sociopathic. He understood. The best way I can describe our relationship was kinda like Dexter and his father in the series "Dexter"

 When I got seriously sick a few years ago he was right there. Took off his job came and stayed to help do work on the place and work on our car(s). Lol. 
I remember one time when he was a kid and I made him help me change the clutch and transmission out of one of my old pickups. That sparked a love in him for all things mechanical. Even tho all he got was yelled at that day. One time when his mom and I hit a rough patch financially about ten years ago, he drove to Brownwood and slipped $900 in my hand. I wouldn't take it and he told me dad I watch y'all give everything away and we've been putting this back for you n mom. And at the time he and Nicole were struggling to get by themselves. If my pickup broke down, he brought me his and said here I don't like the old thing anyway, it's an old man looking truck so it fits you better. Lol. 
I watched him get shunned at times when he was a kid by other kids, but he always just kept on smiling and joking.
I was so mad at him when he quit college.
I was so proud of him when he joined the military.
So happy that he found Nicole. He loved his wife with his whole being.
John was logical, not very emotional. He loved to argue. Lol. And he would argue with anyone and everyone but me. Ha. But we had a lot of "logical" discussions. He honored me and would not argue even when I was wrong about something. Plus he knew I'd resort to punching. Lol
John had a deep love for the Lord. And a deep love for people less fortunate and/or hurting people. He was a cps investigator and loved his job. Had a very unique perspective having been in and out of foster care system in his life, and having a father like me. 
John would give you everything he had if you asked, or even if you didn't. Loving Jesus was just a way of life for John and Nicole. He was faithful. He had been telling me we needed to move closer because I'm getting "old" and the other kids can't handle me and he knew he'd have to be the one taking care of me. I never dreamed in a million years I'd out live him.
I loved that boy and let him down so many times in his life. And the other day I was helpless to save him when he needed me most. He died right in front of me. 
I thought I had experienced a full gambit of pain and loss. All my siblings are gone, and of course my parents too. Almost every close friend I've ever had is gone. Murder, suicide, overdoses, are common to my bunch, sadly.
I've preached more funerals than I can ever remember.
I sure love this boy. Goofy grin and the way he'd say poppa. I thank God for Donna. She loved that boy like a momma bear. Showed him what true unconditional love and Christianity is all about. When he had no one else in his corner he always had Donna. That's all I can say right now. My eyes are leaking. Thank you for reading. If you have kids, call em and tell em you love em. Don't waste a minute. 


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Date: 7/24/2016 4:15:00 PM
Just thinking of you Kelly and want you to know you're in my prayers. hugs
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Date: 7/22/2016 3:41:00 PM
Kelly, I am so sorry for your loss. I can't begin to imagine the pain you are going through. I am praying that God will wrap His arms around you and comfort you as only He can. I know there are no words anyone can say to ease your pain but I hope knowing that we care for you helps in some small way. My heart aches for you.
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Date: 7/22/2016 11:00:00 AM
I pray that sharing your story reminds each one to never waste a precious moment. Each time I call my kids, I try to remember to end my words with "I love you". We never know what tomorrow will bring. I'm so sorry for your loss, but grateful for this reminder, Kelly. My deepest sympathy.
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Date: 7/22/2016 10:58:00 AM
Kelly, my eyes are leaking too, I am so sorry for the loss of your son, there are no words to make that pain go away.. I know this pain well, and writing it does help, it is a release, God bless~
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Date: 7/22/2016 10:25:00 AM
Very emotional blog.I can only try to imagine how you are feeling...Only God can comfort your heart, and prayer.Your son is in good hands..and its his body that you can't see, but his spirit you will feel...Because our spirit is not made to die, but to live.This world is only an introduction of what is to follow.and what follows is serenity and happiness.Your son is still with you, you cannot see him..but listen to your silence and you will feel him... I am moved by how kind your son was,and I am sure you have your own good too...Maybe its time to realize it and work on it... You and your family are in my prayers..Hugs.
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Date: 7/22/2016 8:50:00 AM
So sorry to hear this. Deeply saddened and in tears reading this. May God grant you peace and comfort.
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Date: 7/22/2016 8:34:00 AM
Excuse me for saying this, but as a huge Dexter fan, I really enjoyed the strange comparison you made of your relationship with your son to that of the Dexter/father connection. It's so nice you had this wonderful man in your life. Who thought of you completely as his father. Not all people get that experience with a foster child. Sorry for your great loss, Kelly.
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Date: 7/22/2016 8:17:00 AM
Kelly, we never know the pain of others. I'm sorry for your loss. It's sad, and heart breaking when a parent out lives their child. May God help you heal. Two months, I can't even imagine what you are going through. RIP John. Skat
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Date: 7/22/2016 8:03:00 AM
Your heartfelt tribute piece to your son brought tears to my eyes. I can't even imagine your pain.My mother experienced such a loss when we loss my little brother. She has never been the same but some how little by little she got through it. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. My heartfelt condolences. -Alexis
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Date: 7/22/2016 6:59:00 AM
Gutsy write. Your message will reach ears that need it via poetry soup. You are in the right place. David from NZ
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Date: 7/22/2016 6:58:00 AM
Gutsy write. Your message will reach ears that need it via poetry soup. You are in the right place. David from NZ
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Date: 7/22/2016 4:21:00 AM
I have a huge lump in my throat reading your tribute. My thoughts are with you Kelly I can't imagine the pain of losing a child I think its every parent's worse nightmare :-( Hugs Jan xx
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Date: 7/21/2016 11:31:00 PM
Heartfelt, I am sure your son knows all you have spoken here, your openness is a door to others, dont waste a minute, if only I could heed those very words. God bless.
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Date: 7/21/2016 11:01:00 PM
My condolences, Kelly. Loss hits the heart hard -- but, we must persevere and try to live on.
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Date: 7/21/2016 10:58:00 PM
Kelly, I'm so sorry to hear about your son... my heart is breaking for you. I can't imagine what you're going through. I pray God will somehow give you comfort. You know, you will see your son again... hold on to that hope... your son is ok... and God will get you through this. I'm praying for you and your family during this very difficult time.
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Date: 7/21/2016 10:34:00 PM
I"m so very sorry for your loss, and the pain you are suffering your own child is one hard to take. My prayers are with you. Thank you for your heartfelt moment, it does help to write it down. I understand your feelings and yes it is so very important to show the love that is in your heart for the ones you love even if they just sadly turn away . Hugs
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