Late night ramblings from a wide awake insomniac. . I remember when I thought monsters only lived under the bed. Or in the closet. I remember; the first time when in the midst of a childhood nightmare I realized that I was dreaming. "If I could only wake up" And even tho it dawned on me that the monsters were not real, and that they could not hurt me, I was still nonetheless terrified. "If I could only wake up." I remember. Being a child and wondering what Vietnam was, or where. Wondering if my older teenage brother was having fun there. Getting letters from him telling me he was gonna buy me an ice cream when he got home. He came home. I never got the ice cream. I think that ice cream buying part of him never came back. I remember; thinking adults were all good and could be trusted. I remember. Watching my friend's step daddy punch his momma in the face. "If I could only wake up." I remember; trusting. Preachers, politicians, plumbers, and policemen. Then I remember someone telling me never to trust a human who's profession started with a P, because they all turned into prostitutes when the lights went out. I didn't, and sure enough, many of them did. "If I could only wake up." I remember: watching my mother sob when Bobby Kennedy got shot. And wondering why this man named Martin was killed. I remember hearing about someone named Charlie Manson and his family. Learning what impeachment meant in school. Watergate. "If I could only wake up." Monsters. I remember. Slowly and very gradually learning not to trust. Learning that monsters were real but seldom hid under the bed. Alcohol. Meth. Greed. Ego. Blood thirst. Fanatic. "If I could only wake up." I remember. Learning about; Jim Jones, Jeffrey Dahmer. Ed Gein. Mark David Chapman. Lee Harvey Oswald. David Koresh. Osama Ben Laden. The zodiac killer. Ted Bundy. Westboro baptist. Monsters. "If I could only wake up." 9/11 9/11 9/11 Islam. Taliban. Isis. Al Qaeda. Muslim brotherhood. KKK. Black panthers. Aryan nation. Monsters. "If I could only wake up." The monsters are real, but they're not under the bed. They're in Washington, D. C. On Wall Street. Leading pharmaceutical companies, oil companies, as well as universities. Sometimes even churches. Sadly. Yep, the monsters are real. They all want your vote. And I'm afraid I'm wide awake. Back to the line in the song I quoted the other day. "Wish I didn't know now what I didn't know then." Yessir, the monsters are real, and they want your vote. And your lunch money. And they all hate each other. And I'm afraid I'm wide awake.