Zookeeper Poems | Examples

Me a zookeeper ?

The insane things I would  do if I was
a keeper at a zoo

I would tell an owl he's aloud to blink 
And tell a skunk that he doesn't stink

I would show the lion who is king
And teach the bees how to sing.

I tell the hygiene its OK to cry
And encourage the penguins to fly

I would play music for the rhinos to dance
And buy the elephant a pair of pants 

I  would teach the monkeys how to be good
And give the termite vegetables not wood

I would have no fencing to keep them apart from man

I'm off to the zoo tomorrow so I can start my plan

she is a fabulous fox

She is a fabulous fox, his zookeeper brother said.
Jason had been fooled before, so he ignored him.
I cannot date her myself, she is my co-worker said Fred.
He’s probably talking about a real fox said cousin Jim.

But then the fabulous fox entered the hall.
She was so beautiful, she made both men swoon.
She’s truly something, kind, a living doll.
Introduce me said Jason, who felt effects of the moon.

Zero the Small Zebra

"All night long under the moonlight, as plain as day before thy eyes, he shines in this disorderly world." 
Quote by_poet

Zero the small zebra had faint black stripes,
          shined under the moonlight.
      Monkeys hung by their tails from pipes
                    thrilled at the sight.

The zookeeper loved to brush Zero's coat
          while people stood and stared.
      Marching in a grand way to gloat,
                    white goats were paired.

Zero walked circles around the green grass,
          children on his back rode.
      The zoo wildlife behind thick glass
                    even horned toad.

1/3/2023

Writing Challenge - Zip, Zig, Zag, Zing Poetry Contest
Sponsored by: Constance La France

Don'T Touch the Giraffe

little hands reach out
young giraffe is just hungry
zookeeper panics

little hands petting
zookeeper hands son lettuce
all three are happy

Funny memories contest
January 17, 2022

King Tbq and Me

He was the cutest tiger I had ever seen in a box with a mat.
Discarded and alone, so I could not resist the plea of this cat.
Also, he was free, and what kind of person could pass up that?

I named him Shere Khan Two, but he did not like it and said so.
I was surprised that he was determined to right this before we could go.
I prefer being called King T.B.Q. he told me with flash as it started to snow.

So King T.B.Q. and I ran to the car,
and I thought all would be well in the next scene.
Except he insisted upon driving, and frankly,
his driving was less than keen.
I tricked him into going to the zoo,
and left him there with a zookeeper, I guess kind of mean.

Handy Hints Part1-4

If your second name is file
don't call your son Peter

If horse whispers spoke louder
would the horses not be trained sooner

Save pounds in batteries by only
putting them in the clock when you want to know the time

Make a trip to the zoo more exciting
by dressing as a zookeeper
carrying a gun
and ask people if the have seen a lion

Zookeeper and Friends

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UGX_Z1Yo9TQ 


He loves to keep them all well fed 
his mantra is always quip and trim 
early to rise and early to bed 
but Ali, well he loves to sleep in

Bad Morning

o my goodness she accidentally let one loose
the bus was crowded but that was no excuse
afraid she’d ripped her dress of chiffon
she was embarrassed but didn’t let on
she knew the day was off to a bad start
though she’d gotten away with that colossal fart

got to work fifteen minutes late
her boss threw a pail at her the animals couldn’t wait
she'd rushed off as fast as she could
when she made it to the fence knew she was good
but then she accidentally let another loose
scaring off a nervous frantic goose
though feathers flew she finally caught it 
not her proudest moment she had to admit

next off to feed an angry grumpy mongoose
wouldn’t you know it… she accidentally let one loose 
to top off her first morning not going well
told the zookeeper she wanted back to the unemployment carousel



AP: Honorable Mention 2020

Zoo Zebra

The zoo zebra had zero zest for his zombie like zoo life
But, was very zealous to zone out and count his zany stripes
Appearing to be very Zen to visitors passing by

At his zenith, he would zoom free upon the plains
Now he just zigzags around his tiny pen
Looking for zucchini snacks the zookeeper left for him

At the Central Park Zoo

While watching the zookeeper feed
The penguins was pleasing, indeed.
      A simple technique – 
      One fish for each beak
Seemed to work without witnessing greed.

The turtles and ducks were fed, too,
By a pond that’s a part of the zoo.
     A big bowl filled with grain
     Nestled on their terrain
But they weren’t the eaters on view.

For two pigeons were chomping away
And to add to that urban display
     Into this habitat
     Crawled the skeeviest rat
Who decided he might as well stay.

Just a typical day in the park
Where all creatures once housed in the ark
     Coexist and live free
     To a certain degree,
Though I wish some would stay in the dark!

The News Today

The News Today 
Louvre in Paris has closed its door the staffs stand 
on the steps and sing the national anthem they have 
no lifeboats and can`t stop Louvre being filled with
the art of debris, cleaning up will be a headache 
what is art and what is rubbish.
Meanwhile, 80 million rats have sought higher ground 
occupying rich people’s homes sleeping and eating silk 
sheets and Foie gras get drunk and aggressive on rare 
wine and defecating on Persian carpets  

Also in the news, a boy in Japan has been dancing with
bears and eating their blueberry jam.
The boy says he will be a zookeeper when he grows up 
to put his parents in a cage. The rest of the news is boring 
the routine stuff about useless wars on sand dunes

Bob the Bigfoot

HOLY COW! It's Bigfoot, there in the brush
Lower your voices- he's skiddish
Now, hush
I know his habits, I'm privy as hell
An expert and scholar, I've studied him well

While in line at the grocery 
For years I've immersed 
In various tabloids becoming well versed
I even speak sasquatch
Oh, you don’t believe?!
It's a cross between Latin and baboonanese

His dads a zookeeper, his mothers a chimp
Her name is Chin Chin- his name is Chip
He's a renaissance man
Well at least is half way
The other halves savage in need of a shave

Just stash those cameras he hates paparazzi
And Jack Links commercials
And rappers with posses
He loathes boy bands and people named Josh 
And meat from a can
And Spicegirls called Posh

He's against any wars 
but supports the troops
And completely abhors
When his fur cakes with poop

 detests media bias
mainly FOX NEWS
But believes Bill O'reilly 
has interesting views

He enjoys fine wine and deep conversation
Flinging his poo and masturbation
Those would be two of his favorite hobbies
The world calls him Big Foot
His pops calls him Robbie

Tragedy At the Petting Zoo

No matter a man's call or profession
He must use all the proper protection 
Ask the zookeeper why
For he lost his left eye
When the elephant got an ********


Made for Bawdy
Poetry II Contest on
6/29/14

Zookeeper

Lookin' after pests
Keepin' a CLOSE eye on 'em
"Those wild animals!"

Roamin' around zoo
Searchin' for sneaky monkey
Hidin' in a tree

Zookeeper gets mad
"Where's Marty, the smartypants!?"
"He TOOK my cage keys!"

Case Dismissed

haibun

case dismissed
judge in the monkey suit
takes out zookeeper

Did you hear the one about the judge in the monkey suit?  
No, but I spotted that lady zookeeper,  
what a knockout in her sexy black dress. 

The story  I heard was that the judge 
took out the zookeeper.  

That explains the tuxedo -  to dinner and a play, maybe?  

Did I say tuxedo? I said monkey suit -  he belted her one in front of 
the jury.  Knocked her out cold right there  in the courtroom?  

What was he...some kind of animal rights' activist?   
I dunno? but the jury sure was a monkey's uncle.

• Short Zookeeper Poems
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