Short Instructor Poems

torturous exam
cleansing tides down psyche slide
silted memory
important events recalled
instructor evaluates...

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My friend is shy, ‘cause we call her ‘Pumpkin’.
With great trepidation, she enters the gym
A look at her behind;
And the instructor declined.
“By the time ‘YOU’ are thin, fat will be ‘IN’”...

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Dipstick Dan was no
sharp shooter,
which was such a
shame.
His firing range
instructor said:
“Dan, your method is
to blame.
You really need to
rethink your
sequence -
Fire, Ready, Aim…”...

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Navigating through the recesses
Of my mind, thoughts appear
Out of nowhere like detour signs
Set out in cartoon chases; then, I realize
My pop-up blocker needs updating.

Dedicated to David M.
Blackbelt Instructor...

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Eternal God reveals Himself as the Creator
Preserver of the world
The leader
Instructor of mankind

Old Testament books 
Eternal God’s word
Sacred Scripture
Without Old Testament, we cannot understand Father Christ

4102013...

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B-ible
I-nstructor
E-vangelizes
N-umerous
V-isitors
E-mploying
N-ews
I-n
D-octrines
O-f

S-alvation
A-s
N-ecessary
T-ruth
I-nspires
A-ll
G-uests
O-ptimistically

Topic: Birthday of Bro. Bienvenido C. Santiago (June 15) 
Form: Vertical Monocrostic...

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There is a guy whose first name is Dogde
 His middle name happened to be Rodge
            He got teased in School
                The kids were cruel
    Now he’s teaches ski at a ski lodge













*Inspired by Jan’s Name And Shame poem.

Alexis Y.
02/02/2021...

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  Today, class, we study the cat
    He or she is an acrobat
  Walks a tightrope 'tween low maintenance
    and aristocratic independence

  Some deem it common sense
    others, pure effulgence
  Your instructor used to be a kitty-sitter
    until he took a whiff of kitty litter
...

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College English 101; instructor, Professor Rawlift
who reproached my poetry, but that became a gift.
You see, his criticism made me more astute, and thus,
I was happy to complete the course with a grade of A plus



December 21, 2020
Clerihew Poetry Contest
Sponsored by Regina McIntosh...

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My heart aches
I am fat
It's already too late!

The workout kills
The instructor is hunky

My stomach churns
I am overweight
It is not even funny

The weights are stuck to the floor
The stretch ribbons won't stretch anymore

My jiggly parts burns

Screw this, I'm out for the door!
Let's go out and have a food war...

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Driving along in my automobile 
I looked up there was no wheel 
Foot on the brakes turned to cornflakes 
Found my self in the gym having a swim 

Then I was doing weights 
I called the instructor to put more on
There are no more mussels galore 
Alarm went off with smile on my face 
Another day in the rat race...

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Upside Down World -Miss Snowy Atlas

Snowy Atlas says do your exercise
Feet over head, eyes to the skies
Men why the pain look
You're like fish on a hook
Miss Snowy Atlas is off today, guys

connie pachecho

12/27/17

Non contest entry

Note-Charles Atlas best remembered 
as a renowned fitness instructor...

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Stretching like a yoga instructor
Fun ball of fur
Perky and frisky
Silly silly kitty

Capricious and fickle
Playful and whimsical
And those eyes… beguiling
Enchanting and bewitching 
Simply spellbinding



AP:  3rd place 2020

Submitted on August 20, 2017 for contest ANIMAL NONSENSE sponsored by KEVIN SHAW...

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Let’s take an exercise class
But I don’t have clothes that match!
That does not matter, look at your ass.
Okay I agreed and I began loading my hatch.

We ended up bringing another sister along.
I told her if she matched she would have to pay our fee.
In thirty minutes we were doing every exercise wrong.
The instructor laughed so hard, she gave us our lessons for free....

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Base Jumper

This is my first time in a parachute
Jumping off the cliff face mountain
My instructor told me now, to count to 20
Before I pull the cord
Maybe that's what he said
I figure if I count higher
I can only be more secure
To play it safe, I will count to 95
That way when I land I’ll be more alive for sure
Half way down now I lost the count
So I’ll start over
Splat!...

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There was that bloke: 
That war poet?
Rupert Brooke
He apparently said; and I quote

I suddenly realised that 
The 
Ambition of my life has 
Been - since I was two - to go on a military expedition 
Against the Turks

That's a bit much, isn't it?
Like a cup of
Oniony tea

I will beat Thomas 

And if you got into a car
The instructor wouldn't
Say 
To you, "Well
What do YOU think?"...

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Let’s do the orangutan dance, she suggested.
Several of them took off, wiggling and jiggling.
Sounds great! I agreed, trying to get in the middle of them.
They kept squeezing me out though.

“Come here,” said the instructor. “I will show you again.”
The director of the movie yelled “Take 94, get rid of that one!”
Rude I know, but this was my ninety-fourth try.
The orangutans always out-classed and out-danced me....

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I walked into biology class and there was a gingerbread man.
Take a seat! He said sternly “whenever you can.”
Some of us were stunned. Where was our teacher?
That is my business, he said, reading our minds. My name is Preacher.

Preacher! What kind of name is that for a teacher?
I began to snicker, but even smiling is an overreach-er.
If you have a stern sub like this fellow, Mr. Preacher.
Who in no way resembled our instructor, the teacher....

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I came across a sleeping bear;
Wild in the forest, while we were camping there;
My father and camp instructor always shared;
They often said never poke a sleeping bear;
But alas I didn’t listen, as I picked up a stick…
I began sticking the snoring, sleeping bear
Laughing in delight, I turned around in fright
For I screamed and hollered there was mommy, BEAR

7/29/19
Written words by James Edward Lee Sr. 2019©...

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Perspire for me

I need to feel sweat

Work yourself for me

Until your out of breath

Rise up and then go back down

Work your body

Until you feel yourself shaking

And feel your muscles trembling

Until you're weak at the knees

Do this over and again for me

There is no rush

There's time a plenty

I want you running on empty

Pleading for it to stop

Because you can't take anymore

But what's a fitness instructor for....

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The Aquanaut

The ship sank two survivors on a raft
the Japanese and me.
On the first two days, sharks circled the raft
but they lost interest and disappeared
The Asian man shook my hand and said goodbye
jumped overboard and swam to 
the land of the rising sun.
I was rescued by a fishing vessel the next day
thinking the Japanese had drowned didn`t 
think more about him, till I met him in Tokyo
where he made a living as a swimming instructor....

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‘Sermon to the choir….’
  the writers group sat motionless
  with their heads down

‘Sermon to the choir….’
  they listened for their instructor 
  to announce—“your time starts now”

‘Sermon to the choir….’
  they tried to imagine what they had never seen
  while wondering about what they couldn’t know

‘Sermon to the choir….’
  the writers group then raised their heads 
  and packed their grief to go

(Villanova Pennsylvania: March, 2015)...

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We have dfferent writers, 
Can be story writer, 
Or writer of letter.

Do you know poeter?
Is he a visitor?
In your head calculator?

You see his editor,
With his own moderator,
He is a creater.

Poeter is the newslater,
Like other social sector,
He is a inspector.

He is a instructor, 
He is Like monitor,
Both workers and candidator.

Any news can collect,
News which is incorrect,
It can be correct. 

A source of creater,
Things to better,
That is poeter....

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A Little Like Rape

This sylph came forward 
from the second row
the second day of class 
and asked if
I would edit her poem 
so it would read 
the way it should. 

I told her straightaway
that even though 
this was writing class 
and I was the instructor,
I couldn’t edit her poem
and still have the poem be hers. 

Editing her poem, I said, 
would be a little like rape,
just painful in a different way
whether she understood that 
yet or not.  


Donal Mahoney...

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For this term they're in lavender,
Though last year it was pink.
The little ballerinas 
Grow up quicker than you'd think.

They line up in their leotards
With energy to burn
And follow their instructor 
As they run and leap and turn.

Each week they gather in a group,
Too young for mean girl cliques
But likely that will change 
When personalities won't mix.

For now, though, they're a happy bunch,
So innocent and sweet,
And watching them cavort
In ballet slippers is a treat....

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