Short Income Tax Poems

Taxes oh why not 
and to do have forgot
what will be next plot...

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Now that I'm dead I can finally relax,
worry free of April 15th and filing my income tax.




3-22-17...

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I am going to start my life tomorrow
Or when I get my income tax money
Or when the right man comes along
Or when I find a pony...

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Lizzie Borden took an axe, 
And killed the man from the income tax
When she saw what she had done, 
She went off to kill another one...

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I once was a little bit lax,
Failing to pay my income tax.
There is no need to guess,
I then faced the IRS;
Was sent to prison to relax....

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After taxes, our money's all spent.
We can't save for our own retirement.
I've got a big axe
to grind! Income tax
isn't paid by our own president!...

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Income tax season
Is no reason
For utter despair
Pulling your hair
Shedding a tear
Out of fear
You’ll be broke --
Like most folk!

written January 31, 2022...

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He understood physics to the max
  And his equations had no cracks
 But he was in doubt
 As he tried to figure out
 Each line of his income tax! 
                     ---...

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Soon will be time to pay income tax
They don’t care if you E or send fax
The result is the same
You pay up ‘til you claim
You’re clean like by a dose of exlax


For Carolyn's "taxing times" contest...

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America will be great said the man
Starting with a reduced income tax plan
Nothing but a huge joke
He is just a dumb bloke
His reformed tax break I am not a fan

12/23/18

(Female, Size 8, any stone)...

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You have disregarded instructions
Thus claiming improper deductions
Send money by mail
And IF you should fail
Your paycheck will suffer reductions...


“The hardest thing in the world to understand is income tax” - Albert Einstein
Submitted for: John Freeman’s contest...

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There was a man from Halifax
Refused to do his income tax
    They tossed him out
    Without a doubt
So sad his fun perks got the axe



Submitted on April 19, 2021 for contest ALL YOURS (APR 20) sponsored by BRIAN STRAND  -  RANKED 1ST

Originally posted on September 7, 2019...

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the world just ended today
no more income tax to pay
no more unsightly social ills
we just skipped out on our bills
we finally got those terrorists
hiding in the murky mists
we showed our science is really tops
we proved our popcorn really pops 
we wiped out the Australians
and impressed those little gray aliens...

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If I was a statue
I would be, without wax.

If I was head of the government
I would scrap the income tax.

If I was your favourite pet
I would be loyal and true.

If I won lots of money
I would give some of it to you.

If I ruled the world
I would make it a better place.

If I could work miracles
I would unite the human race.


13/ may/2021...

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Lotsa' things I don't need no more...
A clock, a calendar, a schedule book...
An income tax form...
A bank account...
A Hallmark Card...
Insurance, a credit card
A book of stamps...
A pocketful of starlight...
A moon for romance...
So many things I once deemed 
of great worth,
Now I have no need for, why, my God,
Did these things once seem,
the core of my life on Earth?...

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A Worthy Question?

Our income tax has become outrageous
Our politicians promise umbrageous
Life one step at a time
Then two steps out of rhyme
Is being honest disadvantageous?

On the Prowl

An old man who lived in a windmill
Way up north in the town of Churchill
Was warned he would have to pay
The revenue man today
Spent all night taking apart his still.

 © Harry J Horsman 2018...

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Trump Try To Obliterate Horn Haiku

We can hardly wait
Trump try to obliterate
Cannot educate.

Rumor down filtered
When we will be bewildered
Odd things have occurred.

Like was suggested
Should be properly vetted
Trump have regretted.

Same applies to seeing candidate's
income tax returns. No income tax
return, no apply.

James Thesarious Hilarious Horn
Retired Veteran and Poet...

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Politics what does it stands for? 
Is it a bunch of idiots trying to get votes door to door?
No it’s really many parasites 
Abusing my human rights
By spending my tax to fund an Afghanistan civil war

They call themselves leaders
In fact they are income tax bleeders
Like lambs to the slaughter
They sure to tax the water
So they can benefit from the  tax relievers



*Leader or Follower contest*...

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Destructive and Abusing

His distinction is
Being destructive, and then
Others abusing.

Would like to see the results 
of an MMPI on Trump along 
with income tax results. Or,
is afraid of all the insults.

Jim Horn

This is what I am hearing from
analysts on TV. Fake news is
not helping either. He has a
label for everything. Kelly Ann
is also another example of lying.
Where will it all ever end?...

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Spending My Income Tax Refund

By Elton Camp

For one like me, who to save lacks the thrift,
An annual income tax refund seems like a gift
In other years, there’s been no reason why
That something a bit special I couldn’t buy

An otherwise unaffordable gift for my wife
Or a vacation to relieve the monotony of life
This time the decision has been made for me
For it will go right into the gas pump, you see...

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My Poetry

For me poetry is a way to relax,
it's a way to forget, 
about my income tax.
To paint a picture, with rhyming words,
it can be about anything, 
perhaps, a flock of migrating birds.
A story told for all the world to read,
it may be about a young lad, 
who plants a magic seed.
I would like to think, 
the poetry that I write,
Creates happiness, and perhaps, 
brings a little delight.


Tango....

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Get Grip

Don't flip-Get Grip
This Day-Must Pay
Hard Try-Ask Why
Say When-Not Again
Loser elected-We selected
Big hole-Final Goal
Has ended-He Intended
Over barrel-In peril
Soon ended-Air blended.

Story of Trump's existence as President.
Presidents in office have to show their
income tax records. Should be interesting.

Jim Horn

http://www.poetrysoup.com/poets/top_100_poets_most_poems_all_time.aspx...

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The mickey mouse instructions were many,

   Trying to figure tax to the penny.

      From the very beginning,

         My clueless head was spinning.

            'Twas as readable as Kazakstani!

Robert L. Hinshaw, CMSgt, USAF, Retired
(c) 2015 All Rights Reserved

"The hardest thing in the world to understand is the income tax!" Albert Einstein

Entry for John Freeman's "Famous Einstein Quotes" Contest...

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When Tax Season Comes


When tax season comes, I relax...
not worried cause I have my facts
along with a friend
that helps to the end...
my financial aide, Turbo Tax!

So simple, it says what to do...
just type numbers in, click review.
No big fees to pay
high-priced C P A...
sends it to the  I  R  S  too!


Sandra M. Haight

~3rd Place~
Contest: Tax and Finance Limericks - Old or New
Sponsor: Carolyn Devonshire
Judged: 12/31/2018
...

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My charming husband hails from Halifax
Where they make the world’s finest beeswax
For years he worked preparing income tax
Wearing a suit and tie with neatly pressed slacks
He would take care of details including sales tax
Correspond with clients usually by phone or by fax
The day he retired he reached an all-time climax
I proposed he start to learn to play the sax
But he says he loves to chill and just relax


AP: Honorable Mention 2020

Submitted on February 23, 2018...

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