Short Blokes Poems

CHAPLIN
no sound
around
LAUREL OR HARDY
old fool
so cool
ROAD FILMS
two blokes
with jokes
BONNIE+CLYDE
too snide
both died...

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when this broad brushes blokes
jaws drop roll and reconsider 

except the pyromaniacs
they can't get enough of her






***...

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I know a lass who sleeps around
She's great on top or on the ground
When blokes just like me
Can have her for free
Mr. Right will never be found...

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The Democrats tried to fool blokes
With a coronavirus hoax
Trump knew all along
That it would go wrong
That's why he's singing, "That's all, folks"!...

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My advice to all you sweet folks
Wake up with a smile, you happy blokes
Won't hurt a bit
Well a little I admit
Even if you smile and tell silly jokes...

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There was a poor girl named Sandy.
She decided to sell all her candy.

She sold lots of slow pokes
to rich, horny blokes.

Now, she lives in a mansion, so dandy!.....

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Stan was one of those insensitive blokes, 
who gorged on Jerusalem artichokes,
when gas formed in his gut,
he thanked God for a butt...
now the entire USA gags and chokes....

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My friend Mike is a jolly good bloke
He recalls when he first drank a Coke
   Gas and acid filled his throat
   Then he belched like a goat--
For blokes who drink Coke 'tis no joke...

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Politicians are pompous jokes;
not often are they just plain blokes.
They legislate pure ignorance,
while folks prosper on common sense.

Copyright, August 27, 2014
Faye Lanham Gibson...

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My beer-swilling auntie called Mabel
Could drink most blokes under the table
She sups pint after pint
Almost every night
No wonder her legs are unstable!

06~07~17...

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Why does she keep her lunch in her bike spokes?
She keeps them there, because they are tasty blokes.
They are fresher there, and easy to keep an eye on.
But what if they escape? Asked the eager python....

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As Neanderthals, you must know
that, wherever you may go, 
you will be hunted by the blokes
who describe themselves as modern folks. 
With culture and books, they're so chill - 
until...they begin to kill. 
...

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There once was two lady poets  who wrote
How they would love to pick up 2 Irish blokes
Who where loaded with cash  
And who cut a fine dash  
And that's all  Skat and PD ever wrote 











Sadly I did'nt read the comp rules lol again, but seemed a shame to waste it...

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I was a stranger, you took me in 
but I found you were stranger still.
I guess we’re two peas in a pod 
cuz neither of us fits the bill
of all the many ways the world expects 
two blokes like us to be.
You took me in, now we’ve become... 
the strangest friends you’ll ever see.
...

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Why would someone fall in love with a stump

   I submit that there may be such a chump

      It seems so very bizarre

         But I suppose that there are

            Some blokes as gullible as Forrest Gump

© Entry for Matt Caliri's "I Fell In Love With A  Tree Stump" Contest...

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If you find he’s dangling low
its danger, this blokes a no show
his todger should rise high
pointing up to the sky
If achieved ... well would you say no

I was challenged to write a poem with dangling and danger in it – this is for my lovely friend ‘Dog Daft’

06/26/20...

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Used to be I got haircuts for two bits,

      Along with a shave and hair tonic spritz,

          From the barber bawdy jokes

               Juicy gossip from town blokes!

                    Now for twelve bucks a clip is all I gits!

Robert L. Hinshaw, CMSgt, USAF, Retired
(c) All Rights Reserved...

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At first nobody understands,
some blokes from far distant lands,
when they went to the dunny,
it seemed curiously funny,
they never bothered to wash their hands.

And that’s never our way as it stands,
to wash is what hygiene commands,
so I put it to to them,
and their answer’s - ahem,
because we don’t pee on our hands....

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Mary hiked up to Pipi Springs
With hope of seeing pretty things
A little tinkle
Became a sprinkle 
When all she saw were ding-a-lings

2nd Verse
Contributed by Jan Allison:

To Mary their antics were shockin'
blokes certain all had their cok in 
some folk they were nude 
their bonking was lewd
if unlucky a baby their clockin....

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ROAD FILMS
two blokes
with jokes

NOTE:A footle is a two line lines,2 syllable verse with an integral title-Light Poetic verse form,witty,pertinent,topical etc (technically a trochaic monometer and not necessarily in rhyme).A 'hybrid' innovative sequenced variation has
developed over the years (since 2009)alongside the original definition....

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Brooke rocks the stage and hits the white rook
No joke, no blunder. She screams thunder
Brooke hits the eye with her gleaming look
No wonder other blokes watch and choke.

Brooke rocks the stage and hits the white rook
Closing the gate as she does a checkmate
Brooke hits every chances I went and took
Yet she’ll leave you a message of faith....

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ROAD FILMS
two blokes
with jokes

NOTE:A footle is a two line lines,2 syllable verse with an integral title-Light Poetic verse form,witty,pertinent,topical etc (technically a trochaic monometer and not necessarily in rhyme).
Footles is a 'hybrid' innovative sequenced variations has
developed over the years (since 2009)alongside the original definition....

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My Ancestors slogged in Scottish bogs
Washing wool for the textile folds
And dancing with the spinning jenny’s
Apparently, there were some English blokes 
That I can count among my folks
Well what do you know and what was the chance
Someone hailed from Normandy France
Add to these a lady of the Peloponnese
And this makes up ninety eight percent of me...

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I tuned into yesterday's presidential debate
where neither candidate came across great.
Two seasoned horses at the gate, one will
determine this country's fate.
Too many problems on our plate and they
began to argue about some thing innate..
The borders, inflation, and two wars in our
lap and these old blokes discussed which
golfer has the better handicap!!!...

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Long ago when I was young
I found cycling so much fun.
Climbing hills in fifth gear.
Keeping fit gave so much cheer.
Easily overtaking slower folk.
Teasing all those younger blokes.
Yes, a whiz kid was I.

Sadly age has taken a toll.
Panting now, I'm not so bold.
Lickity split I'm afraid not.
I have to admit my heart's in shock
To contemplate even a hillock....

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