Long Sleuthing Poems

"The Strange Case of F.T."



They say the dead don’t talk
the stories I have calculated
to deliver a saving grace 
confessional shared amongst 
my equal peers, or so I deem 
you somewhat sometimes seem,
less than me, you...

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Hold the phone, hold the freakin’ phone. Lisa’s got a boyfriend!
I’ve never seen Lisa with a boyfriend. Lisa draws men like fireworks on a dark night, but I’ve never seen her keep one. I mean,...

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A big thanks to Bob Newman for the fine Volecentral resource.
 
My example
 
Impatient Pleas     (Cazone)
 
Come lie with me you pretty, pretty thing,
and let us stop our toying with our...

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This is a true story of seven students
Agone days of those ill-famed fiddles
Musing with drolleries – assiduity on catchy missies
And lamed against educators animalism.
Books usually kept aside but concentration hard on last night
Weekends glossed upon...

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It was noon when I got the call
Jewelry store robbed at the mall
It was a young man, very tall
Spoke with a drawl   Spoke with a drawl

In the store, I'd been permitted
Where a theft...

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I strolled into the room, real casual you see
I took a look around, one of them was guilty
*Bang* an authoritative door slam sounds in my wake
Dramatic sunglasses removal, in their boots, they will shake 

A...

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“Holmes, what is the secret of your glory, 
What keeps us thrilled and rapt right to the end?”

“The hook of a swell detective story -
Quite elementary, my modern friend."


“Your methods by deduction, I must tell,
Earned...

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How dare goddamn Laura divorce him
     After thirty years arduous pre dawn sacrifice
     Menopause made her dismiss marriage on a whim
     Told Rod...

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The cats had a rather slow day
So they went to the yard to play
All over the ground
Were nuts to be found
Before long, they had too much to weigh!

The porch, not the best place to keep
A...

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what colour do we wanna look at?
red, of course, like the doorway i knew in childhood
like the blood whispering through the pipes of an egret
it doesn’t matter
yawning voice draining unconscious energy from dying room
the boy...

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the following quite quirky epistle may not exhibit the ordinary characteristics of poetry, but i decided to share this self made challenge (where every word begins with the letter "S" - no explanation can be...

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At the time of the incident, I lived in an old mansion,
that was undergoing renovations and expansion.
Outside the night was dark and a storm was raging,
but, I was cozy in the library with hundreds...

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was it necessary doing so much sleuthing?
was i the culprit or the accusing?
i would have gave explanation of what was done,
but instead you left and our story never begun.  

was it necessary to make...

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Two sisters have enlisted me
to solve for them a mystery.

Sounds and music they can sometimes hear,
and from their manor things then disappear.

What’s happening? Is there a ghost?
Who takes the things they value most?

I stay with...

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HERCULE’S LAST CASE?

My name is Captain Hastings,
Well, ex-Captain to be precise.
And I sometimes give Hercule Poirot
Some help and sage advice.

We’ve been to another house party
And guess what? There’s been a crime.
A man’s been killed in...

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I was a self-admitted misanthrope	 
unwilling to lose or drop a case.
I often threw a rope-a-dope
just to win; I never lose face.

I worked the dark streets
for dark, and even darker, clients
while the cops walked their...

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i am still at times, in shadows
watching you in the world
stealing glances
when the world has drawn you away
there is a beauty i can clearly see
when the picture is devoid of me
meeting for lunch
i step back...

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Do you remember the night the Innkeeper’s body
Was found in the pond behind his B & B, Sherlock?
Of course, how could you forget? We were
Meeting him that afternoon for his opening tea!

I recall how we...

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He was alone and lonely.
Sadness swept his eyes 
before he jabbed at me 
with his cynical sarcasm.

He slowly lit his Camel.	
It was a simple act of murder
and he was a scholar of sorts –
a player...

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It was a mystery
The death of her twin sister
Helen became jittery
On the manner death had kissed her.

These few words sister could only say
“It was the speckled band”
Before her last breath drifted away
The context Helen couldn’t...

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With a fresh cup of coffee, I stepped outside to have a peek.
It was another peaceful morning, in the valley around Soup Creek.
I caught the glint of a Winchester, a model ninety-four.
It was across the...

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Miss Marple is a famous sleuth
She investigates and gets the truth
Murder intriguing has been committed
Just as well she's quite quick-witted.

Whom does this crime benefit most?
We can rule out our charming host
Victim was found dead in...

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Adrian Monk
was in a funk,

Till he got
assistants.

But this particular case
held him in a space,

With which he felt
resistance.

That I can't blame
I feel the same--

Phobia of everything
dental--

Can you, too, admit
while you had to sit,

To a dentist ever...

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Gritting his teeth against distasteful pain,
Imbibing objectionable spirits of his faded familiar bonds!
Breaths strenuous to swallow up like a lump of gristle.

Like an ageless poet hunting down tracks of Leteng's remnants,
Hope becomes all he can...

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“Give me the phone Effie.
I have to make a call.” 
She handed it over to me
and walked into the hall.

The inspector had no clues.
He asked for my two cents,
asked me to give him my views.
I...

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