Long Nitwit Poems

Limericks VI - Religion

Pell-Mell for Hell Mel
by Michael R. Burch

There once was a Baptist named Mel
who condemned all non-Christians to hell.
When he stood before God
he felt like a clod
to discover His Love couldn’t fail!



Why I...

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If I can walk ten thousand miles
Just to see your sunlit smiles,
I’d die ten thousand more times
Maybe, a billion times per chime; this time, I’ve committed love crimes

If I can walk infinity times infinity,
Would I...

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(a poem I've written back in 2013)

I've encountered something quite odd
I'm receiving brand new information
I've given up too many times to count on my underestimated fingers
Trying to think rationally...I've been tricked by your lies that...

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I posit picayune propensities prevail among pesky management

Most favored renter status imposed on us
i.e. meaning myself;
(one tarnished prince of Highland Manor)
and the missus, his princess consort
who must abide by rigorous writ
of tidiness, whereby
every flat surface...

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One generic baby boomer, (a garden variety sexagenarian)...
offers his interpretation of critical race theory

I, (an articulate, charming, domesticated, 
erudite, friendly, genteel, humorous, intelligent,
kind, learned, male, albeit modest – married) 
with freshly clipped formerly gnarly toenails
discounts...

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Across figurative and literal blackened white board...

Where death of democracy writ large,
nevertheless psychological strength predominates
unlike earlier chapters of mein kampf.

Mine hardscrabble existential debacle 
spelled losing game
swept me up in malevolent mindset 
far adrift from harbored...

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dark matter(s)
by Michael R. Burch

the matter is dark, despairful, alarming:
ur Creator is hardly prince charming!

yes, ur “Great I Am”
created blake’s lamb

but He also created the tyger
and what about trump and rod steiger? 


The Echoless Green
by...

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Malignant gangrenous political cancer
corrupts, festers, and poisons United States,
thus opposition cannot wait,
especially since Gospel in accordance

with feeble minded Donald Trump
implemented wrought ugly trait,
particularly obliteration, sans progressive
human rights legislation

more or less pronounced positive
in every L ionized...

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Forget age as a tool for ignorance; relationships for conquest, position for respect, wealth  for social gain and all else forwarding the current rottenism of living, pursuing, presenting and im-prisioning all others u deemed...

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Across figurative and literal board... 
mine hardscrabble existential debacle spelled losing game of trouble

Oft times, I experience wretchedness being alive
spurring wonderment whereby thoughts
of my demise doth drive
analogous to buzzfeeding bumbling bees
combing into their hive.

Giddiness prevailed
when...

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Incomprehensible space/time continuum intrigues...

One insignificant, infinitesimal
incomprehensibleness cosmic speck,
who doth readily confess
swallowed within

infinite cosmic wormhole, nonetheless,
he feels mind boggled, fascinated,
transfixed... helpless to express
following concept suddenly
gripping his feeble mental compass.

I haint never gonna get
smart enough to understand
supposedly...

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NOTE: Just had to bring ol' Barry T. back. As you may remember, he's deffo not a Poe fan, what with his classic poem The Raven portraying ravendom as nothing but a bunch of dimwits...

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I sat at the counter in the corner coffee shop sipping a latte.  It was a dark dreary 
rainy   day.  I was lost in my own thoughts when a woman brushed...

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My head pounds a massive ache
                             ...

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All has come to an end, except for who to proclaim
The winner of The National College Football Championship Game

Excitement is brewing for the play-off game
Some will be at the game watching getting rained on, cold,...

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The healthy man fights not to be sick,
Meticulous doctor prays to have enough patients,
patients hope not to end up in the morgue,
morgue keeper needs more corpses to keep his job,
The coffin maker hopes to make...

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It's Bloody Ridiculous

It's bloody ridiculous....

Make no mistake, Malaysians are such a complying lot....
We complained about traffic jams, road tolls and blocks...
A nitwit politician suggested  waking up early and hitting the roads...
Like any docile citizens,...

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We have some breaking news, straight from the U.S.A.,
her citizens had a meeting and here’s what they had to say.
We’ll send old Joe to the nursing home and turn off Trump’s remote,
and as for the...

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Ooohhhhh Here we are at the premier for the stars!
Look at the glamour, the wraps, the gowns, the elegant cars!
Kermie, can you please stay in the car a bit longer, a second or two?
As the...

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Call me what you may

Call me what you may, A dog, a scavenger 
Or even the dirty pig, but that is way too far
From transfiguring my appearance, call me
What you may even the worst pun...

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How thoroughly you wreck me
With the taste of hope, I can't resist
That you may actually perceive my existence
As if you haven't already taken more chances than I can give
In fact, I gave so many
I lost...

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Aggravated because I was a vulnerable target to your ever-teasing jokes, quirks and games...a victim to taking things too serious and getting my mind hyped up about the things you say and do! I took...

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When achievements stops to you and says bye.
You must learn to espy opportunity.
Try to give the best even at stale conditions
What you do is not erroneous.
You are the esoteric one.
You can,we know, you'll, we know
Don't...

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Hey! I'm a bi polar mess.
I ran out of Paxil and Klonopins
I see why you love this bar.
My friends and I snort cocaine off of trash can lids.
The drugs are free and I'll drink to...

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Channel Five calls mayoral candidate Goots a bully.
He is referred to as the  AntiChrist on Channel Three
Someone on the air yells “liar, liar, pants on fire.”
This is the best news we find on our...

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