Long Hanky Poems

The three little pigs came to the ball
Tried to blow the castle down
It didn’t work
It was made of solid gold
So they gave up and sat at their trough 
Ate noisily 
And snorted quite a lot

They...

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With these lines I’ll relate an intriguing tale of dubious accuracy
For I Hope to unveil sordid affairs of more than one conspiracy!
Be warned, that though you might be disturbed by the facts I relate?
They are...

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Introduction: once again I incorporate 
my trademark penchant 
to fabricate fictitiously
portions of the following poetic endeavor
can you care to 
discern fact from fiction?

Attempts at lifelong friendships and holy matrimony...

Shot thru with figuratively cankerous nub,
cuz yours...

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Stan was feeling somewhat glum,nay even despairing,on Monday morning.
Mary had gone to work on her new folding 6 gear bicycle with own basket and an extra basket from Wells-next -the- Sea 1995
[the wicker basket now...

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Apa  ka, ka,
                               ...

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Circa February 12th, 2122 ~ 10:30 PM

Equals twenty one thirty 22:30 military time
future time traveler looks back one century ago,
oceanic waterways overladen with green slime,
yours truly attempted crafting id est feeble rhyme
far from madding crowd,...

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Fires at a blue pills lab threw up a cloud
Settling over the town like a great shroud
And this gigantic mushroom 
Created a baby boom
Because all of the men were very proud...

Tom Cunningham 

It’s no wonder...

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Future time traveler looks back one century ago

The following poem tweaked 
courtesy original author who crafted
literary endeavor some couple years ago.

Now circa August 20th, 2122, 
or 1930 military time,
yours truly attempted 
drafting id est feeble...

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Recurrent sneezing fit courtesy freshly mowed grass

circa June 20th, 2022
prompted me to stutter 
self addressed rapid fire gesundheit
nsync with, spluttering
“I don't have any allergies!”

An infinitesimal slight speck tickled 
nostril follicle – activated via an itty...

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Future time traveler looks back one century ago

I exhibit health and virility at one hundred and 
64 years astride planet earth, whereby spouse,
(who remained married to yours truly for about
one century – which elapsed in...

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Secrets are anxiously being kept with a behavioral struggle, as one of the special few enters the room; obviously preoccupied with his thoughts. Bottom teeth are nipping his upper lip tucked tight, rope acting as...

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The bases needed sweeping 
As the end was drawing near
Buns and weenies waving
As Fans swilled down their beer

The crowd jumped to their feet
As Macy went to bat 
And while walking to the plate
To everyone he...

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The bet had been bound ... and boldly called,
          Right there on the cold castle grounds at eventide -
       ...

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The Fearless Four plus one

Julie was first with her fashionable queries
With a white envelope that she held in her hand
She knocked on the door of her freckle-faced neighbor
And told Sniffling Sammy about her new plan

Let’s...

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The day was short and I was tall,
oops, got that backwards after my fall,
for I was mixed up and worried,  befuddled I say
on this brand new morning in the month of May.
I set out...

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I hate wearing flamin’ suits and I hate wearing rotten ties, 
but if eating in a ‘glitzy’ restaurant, then I have to realize,
I can’t go wearing shorts and singlets or my best pair of thongs,
and...

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THE FIRST DAY AT SCHOOL

I was three and half
Enjoying my smile and my laugh
But then my father came
Telling me to play a game
A game in which i should hide 
Inside a building that was beside
I...

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An infinitesimal slight speck tickled 
nostril follicle – activated via an itty 
bitty, nitty gritty dirt band noah bigger 
than a mole luck yule set in motion a 
chain reaction, whence mine sensitive 
proboscis honker...

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He'd return after decades
Spent in imagination. Month
spent in reality. He'd return to the
House of comedy,here,to crack
an heart-taking,wits-arresting,Emotions-
devouring,Land-quaking joke.
He'd return with a robust neck
Seasoned with weeping nerves.
The joke cracker,Let's hear.....

Before he return'd
The gym-ed rodents embroided
with pleasant...

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I awoke from a dream I had been dreaming  
With sweat that was popping from my head 
I knew I had to shake it off 
So I got up out of bed  
I...

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  They call me "Snotnose,"
  King of the snot!
  I can slide down a hill on the snot that I make!
  Waves of snot my nose can produce,
  Most of...

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You once asked about the intensity of my love for you..
I didn't have anything concrete to say, or something new..
But it has been just two days since we haven't talked..
And miles of emotional distance I've...

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Hanky Panky

Honey 
My foot is taping
It’s been a while
I figure it’s gotta be almost
An hour

Baby
You know you 
Drive me crazy
How you do it
Constantly
You tease my eyes
It’s no surprise
Your naughty smiles
Make me so ravenously hungry

Aw come...

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nature's way of saying
I love what you do with your tongue
mom used to lick her hanky 
to clean my face I want to kill her
aided by my only allies
the hobo armies of doom
resulted in a...

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I feel just like that old grey squirrel, 
whose belly is empty as can be.
He keeps on searching for those acorns, 
but he has climbed up a maple tree.

He worked hard and long the whole...

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