Long Calamity jane Poems

Geese, Goslings and the Bridge

Sometimes, when you least expect it, Mother Nature makes a u-turn and draws you into the ridiculous.  Such was the time recently as I was returning from a friend’s home...

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Eighteen hundred and three begins U.S. destinies.
Merriwether Lewis and his comrade, William Clark, agrees –
They will go forth, avoid Frenchmen, fighting growling grizzlies.
To find a water trade route that flows west to the Pacific seas.
Louis...

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Donald Duck Chancellor of this fowl kingdom 
wearing an upside down smile's raging hypocrite backwards 
this deranged Duck twitters to and fro as his unhinged subjects 
unwittingly applaud him onto a victory march that never...

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Donald Duck Chancellor of this fowl kingdom 
wearing an upside down smile's raging hypocrite backwards 
this deranged Duck twitters to and fro as his unhinged subjects 
unwittingly applaud him onto a victory march that never...

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A voice from a woman that has emotional depth and concern for humanity is often shunned through strong arming of sources to discredit her psychological state.

If you steal from a children’s cancer research foundation, and...

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"The 50 Move Rule"



Thomas Crown 
rolled his smile 
around her frown

Romance blew a warm breath
over her pristine cowrie shell
Voodoo Mojo Bag

There, 
just there, 
an Ocean made a Blue move

In the Red
Life
Black Black White

White White Black
Read,
A...

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This poem was written after I took a tour of the Little Bighorn Battlefield National Monument in Wyoming, the site of Custer's Last Stand.

It was the year eighteen sixty-eight.
The U.S. government signed the Fort Laramie...

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*original poem follows the Dramatic Monologue

Dramatic Monologue by a Coldcocked Husband

Yes, you know my wife is nuts,
no ifs, but oh her butt.
Mercilessly, I fell hard
for that cupid-heart face,
eyes that were bluebird happiness cute.
She hit on...

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The weekend is here again
And if I have my way
I'm going to spend my spare time
Watching films starring Doris Day

In nineteen forty nine
Ten years before I was born
Doris starred with Kirk Douglas and Lauren Bacall
In...

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Star crossed champions of mirth
Wild hair and wild eyes, both 
To the world they say with arms raised to the sky, 
"What a pity, for we dearly love to laugh!" 
Arm in arm, singing their...

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BROODING NIMBUS

I am not just an ordinary cloud
Dark and menacing all in grey
A harbinger of storm and rain
Ready to fulfil my destiny again
Snow will fall, as it must obey
Blanketing Earth like a shroud

But I do...

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Riding the quarter slot pony
at Woolworth’s five & dime
Would send this half pint cowgirl
back to another time

I was Calamity Jane riding hell bent
to bring the US mail,
Annie Oakley, with dead eye aim,
shooting lint specks off...

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The Ballad of Cat Ballou (Continued) 
 
With her outlaw gang they're now telling a story of how she rode the plains.
The wildest gal in the old west since Calamity Jane.
She killed a man in...

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 Is It Deplorable
And Does It make me Criminal?
If I used my Genius
To become Felinous
As I was craving to become your Ethos

All that I Did
Was to pave my way to your Heart
To be seen as...

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Calamity Jane the adventuress,
Lived and died hard under stress.
She could drink, smoke and shoot,
Out rode most galoots,
Men had to admit she's the best.

Calamity had a kind heart.
with her money she'd freely part.
If she could help,
Why...

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She makes the whip go poppin’, 
Her pistol shots are heart stoppin’, 
Woman of romance, grit and fame, 
Wild Lady of Heart, Calamity Jane. 
 
She’s history, wrapped up in mystery, 
And she lives the...

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Everyone was staring
Frozen in their seat
Down the stairs
Made quite an entrance
Calamity Jane
Without her underwear

Her buxom figure
Generously in full view
For everyone to see
Down the stairs
All watched Calamity Jane
In her birthday suit

The whole incident
Might have gone unnoticed
But...

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