To date the snorthog
has only been seen
late at night in the bedroom
disturbing me and my dreams
first he hogs the bedclothes
then snorts up a storm
while I lie awake
counting sheep
trying to keep warm
but before I become
a grumbly old grouch
there is yet one solution
have him sleep on the couch
Charming child, your apple cheeks
give an appearance which bespeaks
of girlish innocence.
I have ten dollars and ten cents -
Now that you have gained my trust,
do with me what you must.
Sell me cookies, 'lil booger,
and kill me with loads of sugar.
Jack doesn't smile 24/7, sometimes he's a mean old grouch
So Cathie says, “till you're happy again, go sit on the couch!”
He mumbles and sneers
A spoiled brat he appears
Till a dirty big grin reappears on his snout
Jack doesn't smile 24/7, sometimes he's a mean old grouch
So Cathie says, “till you're happy again, go sit on the couch!”
He mumbles and sneers
A spoiled brat he appears
Till a dirty big grin reappears on his snout
What a grouch
As he sits on his couch
Sloppy with a slouch
Always in doubt
Of what he’s about
He gives out a shout
That lazy big lout
Who runs his mouth
Booming and loud
And frightens his spouse
And woke up the mouse
Who was napping in house
And was suddenly aroused
And was on the prowl
Bit him hard down south
He let out a loud howl
The bite was nasty and fowl
As he wore a scowl
He let out a meek growl
Wanting to lay back somehow!
23.9.2021
She was much prettier in death
than any day she had been alive
her mouth softly closed
eyes in gentle repose
no yelling
no grouching
no griping
no complaining
I saw her husband’s genuine smile
For the first time ever
at her funeral luncheon,
And I had lived next door to them for thirty-six years.
Jack doesn't smile 24/7, sometimes he's a mean old grouch
So Cathie says, “till you're happy again, go sit on the couch!”
He mumbles and sneers
A spoiled brat he appears
Till a dirty big grin reappears on his snout
A Neanderthal me comes at night,
He’s storm and grumpy, an ugly blight.
You will not see him with human eyesight.
But he’ll be unkind, and I don’t mean slight.
Every day he comes in late, with a frown and a snarl.
I do not know his name. I secretly think of him as grouch man.
He is a young man, possibly out of college a year or two.
He took this job without thinking about moving closer.
The traffic was horrible today he says in a mean way.
No one replies because I am the only one around.
The teacher’s sign in sheet is across from my office.
I have been here for a couple of hours by the time he arrives.
About the third month of school I turned around and asked
“Where do you live?” He told me and I said “You should leave earlier.”
He is still griping to others, but he wisely keeps his mouth shut
Around me. I am not about to keep hearing this until the end of the year.
(SHORT) SONG OF AN OLD GROUCH
Itty bitty pretty kitty
Sing a sentimental ditty
Furry puppy woofy wuffy
Wrapped in toilet tissue fluffy
Daffodilly bright and frilly
Flutter like a girl’s Chantilly
Maids in dresses white with lace
Smiles as void as outer space
Package them in fresh brown paper
Tie with string - and light with taper
Free of all that cuteness sweet
Give me plate of raw red meat
SONG OF AN OLD GROUCH
Itty bitty pretty kitty
Sing a sentimental ditty
Furry puppy woofy wuffy
Wrapped in toilet tissue fluffy
Flutter little butterfly
Butter me treacle pie
Daffodilly bright and frilly
Flutter like a girl’s Chantilly
Rain-dripped roses, dew drop noses
Little hats like wool tea cosies
Maids in dresses white with lace
Smiles as void as outer space
Package them in fresh brown paper
Tie with string - and light with taper
Then when they‘re incinerated
Grouchiness all dissipated
Free of all that cuteness sweet
Give me plate of raw red meat
1/24/2018
Contest - BUNNY JUMP
Caren Krutsinger
Jack doesn't smile 24/7, sometimes he's a mean old grouch
So Cathie says, “till you're happy again, go sit on the couch!”
He mumbles and sneers
A spoiled brat he appears
Till a dirty big grin reappears on his snout
© Jack Ellison 2015
You
Too rotten
Know
Love
Lord
Once I saw an oddly grouchy grouch,
grousing away on an old couch,
gaping menacingly,
as I eat happily,
my juicy chicken soupy lunch.