Fee-got sew high I say
Man they tryna hem me so
I can't ah-ford nuttin.
I spent ah day in Allen Acres
Bay'd em breakfast
in e sand anna
I installo de cmaera sercur'ems
for de peep-lez.
I say ya'll use dez thangs to set up
quotin the 1933 security act
to create a stage between tensionated peeplez.
ya'll make fussy and nem auge.
I put a plate of cookies
on the table
and fan'd the amora toward the
weight watchers camp
don't I expect the to see
the wihhling dieters
comin ov'r de fence?
Zirpossa? Nah dat aint ritw no!
Caul Musky ya'll hearez us say!
Man told me put the camera on my brand new
McCormick tractor
I laughed sounded all funny
with his ole north accent. I say:
man ya'll be plowin and diskin
why ya'll knead ah-ruh camera?
Told me the rowes of hoes
only the wife know's.
I say yes sir@!
Yes sir!
Ya'll might be encitin ah roit!
Dreamy brownies
dieters downfall
thick cut
fudge iced
10 lb appears out of nowhere
Food and Health Footles
To Health
Nourish;
Flourish
Big Spaghetti
Noodles -
oodles
What Large Hungry Dudes Do
Attack
Big Mac
Advice for Over-eaters
Eat less;
treat stress
Advice for Dieters
Burn fat;
learn THAT
The Organic Way
Should eat
good meat
Sign of a Good Chef
Skilled dish-
grilled fish
Thanks For The Snack
Thy fries
I prize
Sleeper’s Delight
Nice dream -
Ice cream
Caught with Stolen Cantaloupes
Melon
felon
Never . . .
Decline
Tea time
Ladies and gentlemen, and all the rest
We do entertain you to the fullest
As pickle members of well-being zest
Showing functional roles for healthy quest
Making us thank God*, we’re uniquely blest!
Ready are we to show our savory best
Sizzling loudly, exuding flavor’s jest
Behold our spices strong in challenging taste test
Mustard seed, chili powder belt song-fest
While turmeric yodels from choir loft nest!
Onstage are fresh herbs lilting with delight
Ginger, onion, garlic, dill … sway to flight
Along salt and vinegar’s graceful might
Ecstatic midst olive oil’s waltzing sprite
Satiating awesomely everyone’s appetite!
Molasses, alum rise to freedom height
Swirling around cucumbers’ soaring sight
As crispy carrots with shrimps glide aright
Bottled on display for dieters’ plight---
In our party, you’re welcome --- since we palatably invite!
*In every thing give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you.
September 7, 2022
6th place, "It's A Pickle Party" Poetry Writing Premier Contest
Sponsored by Mystic Rose Rose; judged on 9/10/2022.
Economic ruin does loom
as hog industry shows no bloom
since swine fever brings pig pen gloom…
Oh, ham and bacon losses boom.
With avian flu’s sudden attack
chicken-kill was toward bad track
dieters’ problem, poultry lack…
what sad impact on menu’s pack.
Midst kittens and pups' lamenting
dog slay for rabies’ infesting
health issues against pets hitting…
I pray for beast* rescue’s granting.
*Proverbs 12:10 A righteous man regardeth the life of his beast: but the tender mercies of the wicked are cruel.
September 18, 2019
Edited on October 6, 2021
3rd place, " 'R '' Contest, New or Old
Sponsored by Constance La France; judged on 10/7/2021.
I
have
only just
realised the
word FAT looks
like someone took a
bite out of the word EAT
I heard about a study
Which had proof that where it’s at,
In terms of living longest,
Is to be just slightly fat.
When one weighs sixty pounds too much,
That person is obese.
The chances of a lengthy life
Have started to decrease.
But someone who is overweight
By up to thirty pounds
May outlive all the skinny folk,
As crazy as it sounds.
There’s cause for celebration
For the chubby and the plump;
And dieters may pack it in,
For science holds the trump!
Each of us gets tempted
By the things we shouldn’t do.
Judgment gets pre-empted
As excuses we construe.
Dieters give in and claim
Just one bite wouldn’t hurt.
People in relationships think
It’s okay to flirt.
Sometimes we are lured into
Temptations so enticing
That we convince ourselves
We’re worthy of both cake and icing.
Spending what we can’t afford
Or volunteering time;
Starting up a mountain that
We know we cannot climb.
It’s easy to get sucked into
Temptation’s sticky web.
So many foolishly expect
To have desire ebb.
But always things will tantalize
And no one is exempted;
It’s our decision to be made
Each time that we are tempted.
Godiva Chocolates tempt
Dieters beware
Melt-in-your-mouth milky charm
Evokes a craving
My control lapses
I give in
Feast!
*Soup's Syllable counter says "chocolate" is three syllables.