Best Stat Poems


Learning Time

Wonder, wander, list and lust
   to learn anew until you bust.
Read, search, question and look
   for paths you thought you never took.

A world awaits, new kingdoms come.
New skies, new roads, puzzles done.
Machines man made, a technocrat
   to realize some oft-quoted stat.

Never too old, and not too late
   to learn and learn for learning's sake.
So open heart and open mind
   Seek on. Seek out. It's learning time.

Singapore Limericks

SINGAPORE LIMERICKS 

1.	The daughter

There once was a crusty old hawker 
who married his neighbour’s fat daughter
She thought she’d be rich
But she did not know which
Was the reason behind why he’d sought her.

2.	The laksa man

You’d have heard of the hawker named Tan
Who fried all his food in a pan
His clients set trends
And told all their friends
Now the queues almost stretch to Japan.

3.	The Obese eater

Now here is an interesting stat,
If you stop by that stall for a chat
You’ll meet some police
Who are really obese
For the stall’s name is Soon Too Fatt.

4.	Fasting: not

There once was a man so bullheaded
His eating hours always extended 
He’d go to the stalls
But not in the malls,
And eat till his chest was distended.
 
5.	Pizza

A cook who was trying to please
Cooked some pizza with far too much cheese,
He collapsed from the strain,
Said his doctor, "It's plain
You are killing yourself with the grease!"
 

6.	The Bedok Disaster

A careless old cook from Bedok
One day had a terrible shock,
He turned on the stove,
In his hawker’s alcove,
And exploded with all of his stock

7.	Who?

I know an old man we’ll call Choo, 
As he cooked he would call out “Hoo Hoo," 
As the people walked by
They all wondered why, 
But none of them had any clue.

8.	The rescue

A hawker got stuck in his stall 
Because he was terribly tall. 
People asked what was what 
With his head in a pot 
But all he could do was to bawl.

Premium Member Maga Stat

Dear Homeland Security Director No-em
I feel compelled to write you this po-em
They won't let me post bail
Get me out of this jail
I'm not a gang member and want to go ho-em!

My bright and exquisite pink heart-shaped tat
is being mocked by a gangsta in a Maga hat
All hope I must banish
I don't even speak Spanish
My doomed fate is sealed, just another stat


Premium Member Abc's of Capital Cities

Athens, quite a place, so full of mythology
Buenos Aires, in Argentina, a place I'd love to see

Canberra, is just antipodean class
Dublin, a pint of Guinness in a glass

Edinburgh, the capital of the Scots
Freetown, a city, now violence is never sought

Georgetown, a place where Jim Jones left a scar
Helsinki, in its mountains, where reindeer herd so far

Islamabad, one of the greenest cities of the east
Jakarta, very close to where the Komodo's live and feast

Kuwait City, the start of Saddam's downfall
La Paz, is the capital, that looks down on them all

Monaco, where the rich and famous live
Nassau, with her golden beaches, where the breakers finally give

Oslo, in the land of skiing and fjords
Prague, with its architectural hoard

Quito, is the second highest in the world
Rome, to the lions, the Christians were hurled

Seoul, in the lands of the 38th parallel
Tripoli, where many an Anzac's fell

Ulaanbaatar, in a country full of steppes
Valletta, amidst the Mediterranean set

Warsaw, the ghetto's in World War II
Xi'an, its all i have to see this through

Yerevan, near the Biblical mountains, of Ararat
Zagreb, escaped being a Balkan War stat


Written 3/1/2010.





http://www.thehighlanderspoems.com/the-world.php

Living In the Past

The Emancipation Proclamation was put 
into effect in 1863,
That meant freedom for slaves,
the ones who looked like me,
blood, sweat, and bullets were shed along 
with tears,
innocent civilians put through years of hell 
and fed with fears,
nooses invaded necks,
in the home of the brave,
in the home of the slaves,
blood flowing as they gaze,
lynchings were congregational,
often invitational,
white kids kids were taught to look at 
them as merely educational,
he is just another tally in the stat book,
slaves screaming until exhaustion as they 
were made to look,
saliva often found homes on the pits of 
our face,
jeopardizing our case, 
exasperating our race,
if you had children they often vanished 
without a trace,
we were taught not to embrace,
each other in any way,
I know the only way we made it out is the 
good Lord's grace..

Premium Member Your World On A Map

Languages, currencies, religions and flags
Capitals, origins and sorts of tags
Seas, rivers, landmarks and sites of history
Symbols, letters, colors of memory

Pictures of every nation as family
Orders and sects of homily
Cultures and traditions of pride and simplicity
Nurtures and inspires longer than mortality

Your world is not round but flat
Sleeping with peace and honor on the mat
Shapes and sizes of countries so fascinating
Your world on a map, your life in a story not stat
  -- stirring and oscillating


Resolutions

Resolutions

New Years is due and it’s time to resolve
To make  the right choices and change my life
So that in order that I may evolve
To start anew and avoid useless strife
To organize now and seek all my goals
The favorite stat is to lose some weight
To eat even less and avoid  bread rolls
Maybe in time, I’ll forget what I ate
I'll go to the gym and strengthen myself
So I can feel good and make love to Mae
But not to forget my smokes on the shelf
And watch what I spend each and every day
For they’ll come a time when payments are due
To Alimonies number one and two

Resolution Contest December 17,2015
Sponsored by Shadow Hamilton

Marijuana Psychosis

Please, God Please, don't let them kill me 
She thought she heard him shout 
His room is locked, the door is blocked
Three days since he's been out 

A million fears he contemplates
Too scared to rest his head
He dare not sleep or close his eyes
Those eyes of bloodshot red 

He tells her what he's hearing 
And she says it isn't there
The doctor said the weed did this 
She says it isn't fair 

Sedation, medication, stat! 
To save his mind, his life
Drugs of every shape he took
To fight the one he likes 

Son, please say it's over now 
Your here and yet your gone 
The doctor says you wont be back
I pray to God he's wrong

And in and out, and in and out
The dope smoke that he breathes 
And in and out, and in and out 
The hospital, the streets 

I know your there inside somewhere
His mothers voice was shaking 
I know that when you quit this junk
You'll get back what was taken 

Somehow inside his scattered mind
Her voice said to the drug 
That he again someday would be 
The kid she raised and loved 

And in and out and in and out
The doc, the school, the gym
And in and out, and in and out 
Till he again was him

The dealers came a dozen times
A dozen times denied 
Until the day his clean date was 
A dozen weeks behind 

My son, my son, it's been too long
Please say it's you this time
He pointed to his head and said 
I've taken back what's mine 

By Kyle Ezra Kriticos 
Dedicated to those who "never came back" from marijuana induced pyschosis

Premium Member The Cure

I stand with outstretched hand,
dreading to open the door.
Will I become just another stat?
--just another name on the list
of those who go through the cure
only to find out that the gist
of what is known for sure
is that we know very little

Who, Why, What, Where, When

Who, Why, What, Where, When?

Take a meme, and make it clean by belief, engagement, 
God meme, Santa Claus or denim jeans are fundamentals, 
They offer a magic carpet to all partakers into fulfilment, 
When we endorse the concepts behind these credentials. 

Like god, belief in Jesus is optional, warranty undelivered, 
On two levels: as the son of god, and as the son of man, 
The latter being the term more frequented by gospel word, 
When he emerged as the people’s hero, up for a ban. 

Richard Carrier believes that Jesus never existed at all, 
Historically, but he doesn’t speak much of psychosomatics, 
Which assumes contemporary phrasing and a high call, 
To spread medical remedies and to dismiss ecclesiastics.
 
Crucifixion was the punishment method used back then, 
Just as the electric chair is used today in the United States, 
And very many people were crucified each week, like Ben, 
Some who’d changed their name to Jesus, or “demonstrates”. 

Jesus in the Israeli language meant saviour of the people, 
Meaning intrinsically from the Roman government seed, 
Trying to figure out how to make progressivism capable, 
So they asserted themselves in the court case of creed. 

So, if we take the storyline stat, then what does it emit, 
Did Mary and Joseph name the boy on their first day? 
To call him then by an off the rack name - “Jesus” bit, 
Which indicated that he would create medical sway. 

If Jesus crucified as god never happened, that's fine, 
If Jesus was not born virgin god incarnate, then ok, 
But if a Nazarene boy fit the bill as Jesus the myth, rhyme,  
Then don't claim that he needed this mould to thus say. 

And don't presume you don't have a faith to propel you, 
That is, if you believe that a man died for his human acts, 
Towards the poor and the sick who upon old age, chase, 
Were only encouraged to commit suicide as bad facts. 

Reading the text, many Jesus’s were crucified at this time, 
So the canonical gospels may not consider just one healer:
Therefore if you think this then life can be not sublime, 
And so whether you're called this or that is not clever.

What's Wrong With You

What's wrong with you? Why did you do that anyway?
 I guess because I wanted to, like a desire I couldn't stave
 What seems to be your problem again?
 I don't have one, it's in your imagination....
 Are you crazy or what should I ask?
 I don't think so, is this a trap?
 Are you insane like your mother and whole family?
 I don't think so, you narcissistic bastard you see
 I don't understand why you do that
 No and without a brain it will be hard and you never will stat!
 You don't understand anything!
 That's what you think, You don't understand that's the problem Psycho!!
 Look at yourself and not me 
 Then you will see the things you need to see
 Yourself which may scare you
 Your soul which may not even be there
 And your conscientiousness which is not to be found
 Always get the log out of your own eye 
 Before getting the stick out of somebody else's eye 
 Get the log out of your own very carefully....
© Faith Dye  Create an image from this poem.

Premium Member A Long Long Time Ago

A long long time ago, actually it was much further back than that
No one really knows the date as it's become just a human stat

Somewhere out there, the universe was set alive
And it's taken millions of years to realise it's not our prize

It's so hard to get your head around, the events on that day
Where science as we know it, raised it's head to say

From the particle dust, as it swirls in past eons of time
Planets that we have come to know, or we'll discover as our space age climbs

They said we would never find water, on the Moon or the planet Mars
Deep inside our sleeping satellite, behind those lunar scars

Only a few years back, we impeded on it's crater scarred scape
And followed up with a probe, and the readings we can now relate

To leave our planet earth, rocket propulsion desires water
It's part of mans science mix, to the universe and her daughters

What we have discovered is not much, it could be enough for our very next step
If we actually agree to behave ourselves, the very next step is not so inept

A long long time ago, actually it was much further back than that
All that us humans dream, will become our histories stats

Premium Member Our Value System

We all have many values
many different but important they are
laying down our life principles
so to keep us focused by far

These days seem to be gone
nowadays principal values are old hat
everybody throws them to abandonment
thinking it's just another stat

Consider well what is value
what's important to you
as it could effect history
to show yourself in what you do

What do we value in life?
our life itself is our very breath
without such a value we're doomed
for ultimately it ends in death

The Enemy of Depression (Believing In Prayer's) Pt.2

The family was all gather in the waiting room at the local hospital. The new's of
Anthony being shot had everyone there in a state of shock and feeling dispeckable.
Just about a month ago the elder Anthony (Sr.) died after a serious car accident that
left 3-people's dead and a little boy in a coma, after recieving a large cut on his head.
So now his mother is deeply in need, and all are praying as they wait for answers-about
what seem like a hundred year's a doctor dress in hospital garment steps in the waiting 
room, "sorry to be the bearier of bad new's, but Anthony injury was to seveered-we did
all we could, but sad to say....he's dead". The outcry of emotion was unbearable, Anthony
mother is given a shot to help her calm down and relax. "The enemy of depression is stat-
ed to begin when the enemy think's you're vulnerable at your most perplex stage".
But the power of prayer is a medicated antidode that wards off when the mind is slated.
Believing in Prayer's, Justifie's my stronghold on hope. "For faith is the substance of things
hope for, and the evidence of things not seen". Member's of Anthony family prayed inclusi-
vily for the carjacker to be caught, for he shot Anthony and stole his car, being depress
already she kept on praying thru-out this ordeal, and within hours, he's caught.
   Thank God for being so real, his younger sister is heard as she shouts-after they're told
of the capture and still very sadden about Anthony ordeal, God has a way that brings about
hope--hope brings this family some thrill.
A whole lot of people deal with depression, some in the most provocative way. I myself
Believe's in faith, when the enemy tries to ruin my day.

Future So Bright

I traded my soul
For control of many riches
Not all are born with wealth
One of lifes' many glitches
Maybe one day
If I pray hard and long
I'll live without a problem
And nothin will go wrong
Many times thinkin
I would be broke bound
Another person in the streets
Scrapin pennies off the ground
A bottle to my lips
Body going numb
Sleepin in a shelter
Always beggin for a crumb
Seen it many times
Don't wanna be a stat
Livin without love
In the alley like a cat
Just for one time
Wish karma would come my way
Every night thinkin
Tomorrow's another day
Thank God I've got my family
Who's there and got my back
Now at the train station
On a one way track
Mind feelin strong
Vision much clearer
Lookin straight ahead
Never glancin out the mirror
Not stoppin at the sign
Always starin at the light
With the sun shinin down
I know my future's bright

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