Best Shite Poems

I went to bed last night 
everything was fine, 
I woke up this morning 
I couldn't believe my eyes. 

My hair was dyed green 
a...

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Ha ha ha - I am sat on the loo waiting to pass
Whilst reading the funnies I need more gas
Peoples humour is right up my...

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Jan 2015
2 wrongs
don’t make a right

Tit for tat
Chit for chat
Like for like
Spite for spite 

Yes and no
Friend and Foe
Black and white
Sugar and shite

Forward not back
Defend...

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Cement Pillow

Blame, blame, blame
makes playing life’s game so much easier to do…
Shift it, change it, switch it as long as it ain’t put on you.
Blame,...

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THE BIG BROWN BEAR SITTING IN THE WOODS . . . 
 
So I thought I would have a day out in the woods 
Trampled...

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Anyone can write…
 and drown in their self-delusions; 
 from persons into personifications
 lists of passions, glorify self's illusions; 
 down those lists, 
 most...

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Wood burner, smoke choke,

Dog shite, bullfight.

Hashtag, manbag.

**** bleaching, hate preaching.

Save the fox, change your clocks.

Prom queen, crime scene.

Chocolate fountain, food mountain.

Buy to let , insure...

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Up sprang a gust of playful wind
scattering cherry blossom in this Maytime spring
swirling about legs, old and rickety
leaving a scene of enchanting serendipity
'twas a canines...

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Sebun Nihonjin Okoku no Senso (War of the Seven Japanese Kingdoms):

Sebun utukushi okoku wa, senso o sengen shimasu (Seven Beautiful Kingdoms Declare War), Heishi no...

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a smile you never forget


In Yokohama the moon is so bright
there is woman watching TV tonight
today the rain fall and she got wet
and she wears...

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Yawn
Yawning 
I am in love with my bed
While my bloody alarm 
Pains my head 
Got to get up
Snooze button stuck
Because if I wish to remain...

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Ribbon as red as blood floating in the air
The blowing wind gives it a bit of a flair
The yellow one beneath it waving the other...

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TING means “thing” said she who masquerades as my niece with the tongue stud and nose ring. 
We used to put them in our ear,...

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MIRROR MIRROR                       ...

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Login’s For Me, Me, Me!

Some carers are shite, debasing and all that, not fit, 
Because just when I’m speeding to end my session, 
When they’ve...

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