Best Salesman Poems

“Hello, hello Good Morning!” The salesman says, (though it’s actually late 
afternoon.)

(We can’t have them rushing off,) he thinks, (when I have cars to move!)

“See this little beauty…” (The side I’m leaning on anyway!)

“I’ve so many interested buyers, I’m sure, this car will sell today!”

The...

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Christmas comes just once a year
And that should be a blessing,
It’s not the birth of Christ I fear,
It’s the shopping that’s so depressing.

They now fire off starting guns,
To start the spending is their goal.
But the news stories that the TV runs,
Report the shopping day’s death...

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Shiny suited man growling on cell phones 
Selling BMWs to tidy his life
Salesman pleads in begging tones...

“Full Coverage” the shiny man moans
“On Sale” says the customer’s wife
To reveal gray and black BMW clones

The salesman barks with hasty tones
“Our insurance will save your life”
Policemen pardon when...

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I spill my heart,
I spill my guts,
And you may ask,
Why all this fuss?

Owners Selling Dogs,
Owners Selling Guns,
Oh there is more,
And it's been great fun.

Day after day, month after month,
Countless are the hours I spend,
To create this behemoth,
Seemingly to no end.

Owners Selling Cars,
Owners Selling Trucks,
Oh there...

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Hello madam, and welcome to our place of business.
Is there any way that I can be of assistance?
We have a huge selection of cars both used and new.
Chances are we have the right one on the lot for you.
We sell and service cars from the...

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On a Good Friday at 3PM
He was called into the office by
Pontius Pilate and told that he would be put to death.

He had waited for the execution and worked the full week after being
warned that he would be fired if his production and sales were...

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Al  pushed to sale the most cars on the lot
He came up short, he gave it his best shot
         Went to a online sales school
         Paid much, he...

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The four walls of this hotel room
Look the same as the four walls of the other
The name of the city where you happen to be
Is just another detail in which you smoother

The life of the traveler sounds glamorous
To those we leave at home
But there is...

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I can't sleep.
Or, I can
and did
for three hours
but I continue waking
into a Stephen King nightmare
too real to ignore
because I feel isolated
in this quagmire
of hopeless history.

In this my collective nightmare,
President Trump goes to Saudi Arabia
like Mr. Smith goes to  Washington,
bold as an August justice day,
to...

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once a slick salesman from nice

soaked his suits in tubs of grease

so he slid through town

with nary a frown

till someone called the police.
...

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Step right up! Settle right in!
For I’ve a tale for you I’ll spin.
Step right up enjoy the show,
I’ll tell you things you already know.
The beauty of it is I make it sound new.
This magical tale I’ll spin for you.

I’m a North American Shaman,
A Shakespearean sage,
A...

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Listen to my story, familiar, I’m sure,
Listen to it, yes, I’m afraid, insecure.
With all that is, the masked thief,
If you listen, it is the whisper deep in the trees,
The gossiping dust devil spinning around town,
Just listen. You’ll recognize its sounds.

What is the truth? How should...

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He died young
   after making multiple phone calls
Sometimes he had to beg 
     the professionals he called
However, his totals were high enough
 so thsy didn't fire him 
I, too made plenty of phone calls
    Banging my...

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Door to door, floor to floor,
walking, knocking, talking.
They have the most, least, best,
fastest, strongest, ever to pass the test.
Any or all to be had for a price- - -!
They are nice but never stop talking.
They can’t make a sale by walking.
Knuckles are sore from knocking.
They...

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Some say presentation is everything and more
That’s certainly important if selling is your game
I learned that while managing a piano store.

Sponsoring concerts with musicians of fame,
Selling the idea that a buyer can learn how to play
That’s certainly important if selling is your game.

We demonstrated easy...

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