Best President Poems
Undone for all to see ... human fellowship, peace created
Every life has a beginning ~ brothers and sister
regardless of color or disease
For all the beauty that haunts our dreams
Can we turn the truth ... something more clearly
21.01.2017
Sun :) - A-L Andresen :)
Copyright © All Rights Reserved
-Dr President Lady, please launch the nuclear war button-
I'm packing up my girdle; I'm heading up state
Where society thinks only men should run for president
Chill with Bill, on the side show Hill
Subsequently, he got tripped up with his hand in the biscuit jar
This poem is not about me... It's not about, Hilary
I'm here to cheer and throw off an early vote voluntarily
I'm numbering my days with the aces
Until the 2016 U.S. Presidential election
Only in a woman, you’ll find confidence and determination,
Someplace out there is our leading lady in disguise
A woman who sits down and pee's with pride
A woman Like Hilary, whose place was denied in the sun
I will vote for a woman who is not afraid to lead,
Grab up her crotch, and fight for all the right reasons
Repaint the town white and her fingernails red
Blue lipstick in the breeze, a tommy gun in her possession
A million dollar diamond ring,
A mink from all cultures of the globe
Sing hallelujah, Amen Praise the Lord!
Pink ribbons of freedom,
China can test all her might,
It's time to feel the empowerment of a woman's delight
There she’ll be’, sit down and enjoy,
When it’s time to hear her voice,
The bullet will miss her beautiful mind,
She'll Raid the Democratic Nomination moment of the blind
Her ego on the side; when it's time to reason with society
Feel the shattered glass feeling when sharks attack whitey
Cop Out the Republican Bully
Black Ops the Democratic Liar
For women can reach, preach, and teach,
Nursing a world, collaborating with every mind
A barrier to be breached, a blessed moment to come,
If you require a true hit, vote for a woman in the Oval Office
Who said Mrs. Wonderbra can’t launch the nuclear war button
By:)
THE LATE HUMOROUS MANDELA
The late former President Nelson Mandela,
Was known as an extremely humorous fella,
A respected freedom fighter and leader,
Referred to her Majesty as Elizabeth, amusing many a reader.
ENTERED FOR EDUCATE ME WITH HUMOR – LEADER CLERIHEW POETRY CONTEST
24/1/2019
Dear fellow soup readers and judges. Having realized that line 4 did not adhere to competition rules I have edited and changed it.
BUT SERIOUSLY
“The Unprecedented President”
Mirror mirror on the wall
Who’s the greatest President of them all?
“I am the voice beyond-beyond...
A truthful answer I must respond.”
Yes, it is the truth I quizzically quest
I ask again, who is the beauteous best?
“You are”, the mirror said with fingers crossed
The mirror knowingly well a lie was tentatively tossed.
In the mirrors, we see rewarding reflections
Layered lie's of life’s derailed defections
Illicit illusions with abundant attractions
Pompous portrayals of diplomatic distractions.
Jan.22.2017
BUT SERIOUSLY - Contest
Sponsored by: John lawless
I have claimed to be apolitical but there are times
when the crop is ready for harvesting, so I put fuel
in the John Deere, ink in my pen and wrote...
He'll get millions of votes for that nicked ear
The vengeful narcissist people should fear
Picasso President
With malicious intent
He should be given the famous Bronx Cheer!
It looks like the graffiti on the wall
Four more years and America will fall
Trump will blow his own horn
Guilty of loving p.o.r.n.
And the rape of all the women he's mauled
There's another Trump, Junior's daughter, Kai
Brought a tear or two to dear grandpa's eye
It was her intention
During the convention
To convince people that he's a good guy
Melania was there but just for show
Since he paid off Stormy... well uh, you know
She has kept her distance
Abhors his existence
She can't be with him since he's had a ho
His Trumpeters may be humbled one day
Those who will vote for him and have their say
Those who are so headstrong
Thinking he's done no wrong
The beast who led America astray
He hasn't made the US great again
He's torn the nation apart... friend from friend
Time will tell the story
But there'll be no glory
Picasso President is no Godsend.
Trump toadies must be in a state of bliss
When his venom spews like a snake, hiss, hiss
They praise the dictator
The alienator
His villainy too baleful to dismiss
I've never liked saying, "I told you so"
But D J Trump is a jerk and a schmo
He's a divisor of men
When he's elected again
His tyranny will reign like a deathblow
I've read a few posts about Trump and yet
Not one comment did I write to upset
Another poet's view
I expect that from you
Without hostility or epithet
My favorite President is yet to be
He may well not go down in history
For he'll do what really needs to be done
Antagonizing almost everyone under the sun
First he'll fix Social Security; it's running short of cash
Upping retirement age to 68, a move the 'swamp' will call rash
Then he'll crack down on Medicare/Medicaid fraud and crime
Infuriating the clout-heavy cheaters in America's medicinal slime
Next he'll free up school choice for the poor, not just the rich
More vouchers and charter schools: teachers unions will yell and beech
He'll clean up the ghettos, bust up the gangs, and load up the jails
Violent felons and their Park Avenue backers will want him impaled
He'll break the stranglehold on free speech and inquiry in universities
Big-tech CEO's will squirm, when he ends their totalitarian strip-tease
He'll repair the military, building the strongest defense ever
Daring China and Russia to come get us -- They won't; they're too clever
He'll veto delusionary pork projects which taxpayers can't afford
Boosting old-fashioned 'capitalism' -- for that he will not be adored
As for climate change, he'll pressure China, India and the other slackers
To reign in their CO2 abuse, while the world calls him a bully and hacker
Truth is, my favorite President-to-be will probably never get elected
And if somehow he does, I hope from angry mobs he'll be protected
~ Inspired by, but not an entry in L. Milton Hankins'
'Your Favorite President Contest' ~
Until recently many had never heard of this man's name
But tragic circumstances have catapulted him to fame
A lawyer and a comedian then in two thousand and eighteen
He decided to become involved in the Ukraine's political scene.
In two thousand and ninteen he won the presidency
And vowed to maintain freedom and democracy
Once in office he worked hard, giving it his best
And wanted a good relationship with countries in the west.
Alarm bells rang in Moscow and a decision was made
Putin wanted the Ukraine back and decided to invade
He thought it would be easy and over in a few days
But didn't account for the Ukrainians, who didn't want the old ways.
He called on his people to bear arms and to stand up and fight
Thousands came forward to stand against Russia's military might
They had once won freedom and wanted to keep it at any cost
But Russian aggression then bombed cities with many lives lost.
It has been a week now the Ukrainians are not giving in
And sending a clear message to the aggressor Putin
Who's responded with barbaric acts of total aggression
And unleashed on civilians, weapons of mass destruction.
President Zelensky has been offered the chance to get away
But said " I'm fighting for my country and here I will stay"
Whatever the outcome of this conflict he will stay until the end
He's an honourable man and on one you can depend.
The whole world is behind him and holds him in admiration
He stands ready to fight and give his life for his proud nation
To retain Ukraine's freedom he will do everything that he can
And compared to the aggressor Putin he's ten times the man.
Written 3rd March 2022
I am absolutely positive Donald Trump is my President
... CayCay
Anthony Slausen - A Positive President Trump Contest
February 10, 2019
If I were the president,
in our fatherland, no citizen will be a bastard
and mutual respect, our networking web.
If I were the president
the people will be my senate
and their satisfaction my template.
If I were the president
all sectors will be cycled with excellence
all human needs will be met with kindness.
If I were the president
cremation of human disasters fully executed
our mentality will be built in love.
If I were the president
good ideas, I’ll romance
into reality, I’ll convert.
If I were the president
life will be a comfort zone
with every compatriot a beneficiary.
If I were the president,
the simple flow of Life would be applied;
basic made basic, luxury made luxury.
If I were the president
health, mobility, literacy and justice
would be rights, not privileges.
This third world I see
would be transformed to the first, I dream of,
so God……… Make me the president that we need.
NOTE: In response to this Poem I have received a surprising pleasant letter from President Obama today 5th March 2015 itself. To see that please visit my Blog on PS of 5th March 2015
or use following URL:
http://www.poetrysoup.com/poetry_blogs/blog_detail.aspx?BlogID=26299&PoetID=17041
You Have Touched Our Hearts Mr. President
Thank You Mr. President
And the First Lady
For Your Visit to India
On Our Republic Day 26th Jan.
In This Visit
And Specially in Your Last Day's Magnificent Speech
You Have Touched The Hearts Of Every Indian.
Together US & INDIA
CAN SOLVE
WORLD'S MANY DRASTIC PROBLEMS
WHILE BRINGING PEACE AND PROSPERITY
FOR INDIA & US
AND FOR THE REST OF THE WORLD.
IF YOU GO THROUGH MY POEM Dated 4th July 2011-
'GREETINGS TO USA FROM INDIA'
YOU WOULD KNOW
THAT WE HAVE AN OPEN HEART
TO MAKE YOU
(UNITED STATES)
OUR BEST FRIEND AND PARTNER
FOR THE LAST MANY DECADES.
THANK YOU ONCE AGAIN
FOR ACKNOWLEDGING THIS
MR. PRESIDENT
WE CAN WORK TOGETHER
TO MAKE THIS WORLD
A MORE BEAUTIFUL AND BETTER PLACE
TO LIVE AND LOVE.
BON VOYAGE
TO BOTH OF YOU MR. PRESIDENT.
On behalf of millions and millions
Of people of India.
Ravindra K Kapoor
Kanpur India27th Jan. 2015
Presidents and Prime Ministers keep coming and going in every country of the world. Often without leaving any impressions on the minds and hearts of that country's people, but you are different Mr. President. By your simplicity and graceful expressions you have created Magical effects and impressions on the minds and hearts of my countrymen. For which we feel honored and sincerely thank you Mr. President and the first lady Michelle Obama for your visit on our Republic Day 26th Jan. 2015. We are also thankful to our dear Prime Minister Mr. Modi, who invited you for this historic visit.
I’m Tweety Bird and ‘I tawt I taw a puddy tat,’
But what I mean, Trump’s nightmares fear a democrat,
I’m as yellow as your hair, tweet,
Feel sure you dye it fair, tweet,
Vulgar antics towards opponents, shows lack of morality
Fake tan, untruths, arrogance and more, sadly your totality.
Become a mature American leader Mr. President,
Your unacceptable rapport with world leaders has evil intent,
Sorry, you are just a reality show,
A favour, take a bow and go,
You fuel Racism, Feminism, Semitism, encourage Supremacists,
Build a wall, which Mexicans dig under, such a hedonist!
President-elect Tweety Bird, stop your victimization, it’s become boring,
Debateable If you possess, any political finesse, for war hoping?
Hurriedly looking for a vaccine,
I Tweety Bird, first in line,
Side effect, maybe both of us losing our yellow fluff!
Would discuss climate change, but know you’ve abandoned this, rough!
“HELLO, MR. PRESIDENT!”
We had all been issued small American flags on sticks.
Jack was on probation, as was I, but we were, reluctantly by Mrs. Mengin, finally
Let into the mix.
“Now boys and girls when the big black car with American flags comes by
We will all stand at attention salute with the right hand wave our flags with the right
And say ‘Hello Mr. President.’”
“HELLO, MR. PRESIDENT!”
“Good!
Let’s rise and form a single line
No talking!
Jack! I’m not going to put up with it!
Stay out of the street folks!”
(what’s this? Hadn’t noticed Hadn’t been listening all morning –
the excited whispering all around)
Sudden shuffle Giggles…………………………………………………
Downstairs Outdoors……………………………………………….
“The President is coming!”
“Down 14th Street!”
“Boys and girls!
Stay back from the curb
Against the fence!
Don’t forget what we all say
Remember to stand straight”
“Do you think he well really come by this dumpy old school?”
“HELLO, MR. PRESIDENT!”
“Shut up, Earl…………..and it aint no joke!”
………………………………………………………………………………….?
“Is he coming Mrs. Mengin? He should oughta be here by now”
“I…………..I can’t see him……..yet………?
I wonder?.............
Oh dear!”
A half-hour passed
The futility of waiting began to be realized
“HELLO, MR. PRESIDENT!” Jack laughs
“That aint him Jack that’s an old lady….HAW HAW!”
“HAW HAW………………………HAW HAW!”
“HELLO, MR. PRESIDENT!.....HAW HAW!
Punishing Jack was put off because of the moment’s frustration
“Alright! Boys and girls let’s go back inside
Hurry!
Back to work!”
Mr. Roosevelt had gone down 17th Street instead
Oh By Gosh… and By Darn… It’s another political year.
Dragon wants in on it as a political candidate My Dear.
President Dragon is a lot… to sincerely be able to take in.
And he wants his own cabinet… So that he can surely win.
My cabinet was emptied and filled with penguins, to my chagrin.
They were secretly plotting… their strategy, they said with a grin.
Then they closed it back up, I thought, until who knows when.
Twitter was now in play, as his name appeared with his own spin.
He was now a candidate in every, single, blooming, complete state.
But, he was only to be found in Australia, I truly kid you not mate!
So… sorry you guys, I said, as I explained to them, their mistake.
They then decided to win, on two continents, to my amazed chagrin.
Shortly, they appeared on every docket, and state, in the good old US of A.
They even signed him up, for the flame-throwing contest in Rio, this day.
Apparently, World domination was absolutely, in mind-boggling play.
But I’ll be darned if I’ll wear a burqa, for that Middle East picture, today.
Dragon was to be the Law and Order Candidate, for even deep space.
He’ll wear his Super Hero Cape, wherever he goes, all over the place.
He pulled ahead, quickly in every state, without showing his cute face.
But there are a lot of Democratic crazies, in the United States these days.
And don’t forget the disillusioned Republicans, with egg on their face.
Never worry my friends; he’s below the age limit at three, in any case.
I’ll wait until later, to point that out, so someone else, eventually wins.
He’s learning about politics, tho political correctness, may be his end.
If only I could get my cabinet back, and set his penguins, on another track.
Or maybe I sould say, don’t delay, vote for Dragon, to get my cabinet back.
He can’t be any worse than the other candidates I see… and guess what?
He soundly, has the world’s paparazzi behind him… So it’s going to be…
A Great News Day, day after day, until November 7th, so vote for Dragon!
What else can I say!!! There’s too much at stake… to vote any other way!
Written 8-21-2016
The 44th President “one who is blessed” in Swahili,
Happens to love his wife’s Shrimp Linguini.
His desk, in the senate office once belonged to Robert Kennedy!
Renegade Tried to make it in to an all black male calendar,
But was rejected by an all female committee.
He wares $1500 Hart Schaffer suits,
With one of his identical pair of size 11 shoes.
When the president stands up you never hear any boo’s.
A few good luck charms he has with him,
A Madonna and child frozen for eternity,
And a bracelet of the arm of a man fighting in Iraq.
Bar can lift an impressive 200 pounds wile lying on his back.
His favorite delight to drink is Black forest iced tea,
Wile looking at his red boxing gloves signed by Mohamed Ali.
But never ask him out to Baskin Robbins, he don’t like ice cream.
But if you gave him a chocolate protein bar his dream.
Hide any dog meat snake meat or roasted grasshoppers up high,
For all these things he has tried.
All wile keeping his dignified pride.
He gets a snip and a trim once a week cost him $21 dollars,
That’s real cheap thanks to Zariff.
In whom the Obomber confides in to talk about the week.
He mite have been the one who convinced the malotoe,
To trade his Chrysler 300 in for the hybrid.
His memoirs, Dreams from My Father won a Grammy in 2006.
He was o past war president that was left handed the 6th.
He left a stag party which had a stripper in 1996.
As a teenager he tried marijuana and cocaine,
And Berry collects comic books like spider-man and Conan the Barbarian.
His specialty as cook is chili,
His favorite TV shows are Mash and The Wire.
He has four places in a Chicago home to build a fire.
He uses an apple Mac laptop to look at Pablo Picasso art.
He has read every Harry Potter book,
I wonder if he spoke Spanish to his pet ape back in Indonesia.
Not-So-Heroic Couplets
by Donald Trump
care of Michael R. Burch
To outfox the pox:
kill yourself first, with Clorox!
And since death is the goal,
mainline Lysol!
No vaccine?
Just chug Mr. Clean!
Is a cure out of reach?
Fumigate your lungs, with bleach!
To immunize your thorax,
destroy it with Borax!
To immunize your bride,
drown her in Opti-cide!
To end all future gridlocks,
gargle with Vaprox!
Now, quick, down the Drain-o
with old Insane-o NoBrain-o!
Trump’s real goals are obvious
and yet millions of Americans remain oblivious.
—Michael R. Burch
Less Heroic Couplets: Just Desserts
by Michael R. Burch
“The West Antarctic ice sheet
might not need a huge nudge
to budge.”
And if it does budge,
denialist fudge
may force us to trudge
neck-deep in sludge!
NOTE: The first stanza is a quote by paleoclimatologist Jeremy Shakun in Science magazine.
Less Heroic Couplets: Miss Bliss
by Michael R. Burch
Domestic “bliss”?
Best to swing and miss!
Less Heroic Couplets: Then and Now
by Michael R. Burch
BEFORE: Thanks to Brexit, our lives will be plush! ...
AFTER: Crap, we’re going broke! What the hell is the rush?
Less Heroic Couplets: Dear Pleader
by Michael R. Burch
Is our Dear Pleader, as he claims, heroic?
I prefer my presidents a bit more stoic.
Less Heroic Couplets: Less than Impressed
by Michael R. Burch
for T. M., regarding certain dispensers of lukewarm air
Their volume’s impressive, it’s true ...
but somehow it all seems “much ado.”
Less Heroic Couplets: Poetry I
by Michael R. Burch
Poetry is the heart’s caged rhythm,
the soul’s frantic tappings at the panes of mortality.
Less Heroic Couplets: Poetry II
by Michael R. Burch
Poetry is the trapped soul’s frantic tappings
at the panes of mortality.
Less Heroic Couplets: Seesaw
by Michael R. Burch
A poem is the mind teetering between fact and fiction,
momentarily elevated.
Less Heroic Couplets: Passions
by Michael R. Burch
Passions are the heart’s qualms,
the soul’s squalls, the brain’s storms.
Keywords/Tags: Donald Trump, coronavirus, president, poet, poems, poetry, heroic couplets, couplet, humor, humorous, Clorox, Lysol, disinfectants, light verse, parody, satire, America, USA, giggle, political, natural disasters