Best Disgusting Poems
"a thief of my words who plunders my reflections- a leech parasite"
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December 26, 2019
Poetry/Monoku/disgusting thief
Copyright Protected, ID 19-1211-751-02
Written for the contest, A Thief Who Steals Your thoughts
sponsor, Bobby May
First Place
DISGUSTING COMMERCIAL
As one gets older things begin to sag
Belly hangs over, energy lags
Better take thought for your health old man
Heed this add, start our diet plan
Oh, there’s fat-free, sugar-free, freedom from gas
Beach ball bloating a thing of the past
Darlene B,, bikini beauty, she lost fifty
From obese to trim now aint that nifty
I tell ya, gordo, though you may resist
Fifty off that paunch will never be missed
If going cold turkey has failed in the past
Cash on the line will save you at last
Our plan now comes with money back guarantee
So what if you pig out – go on a spree
Nothing’s lost but your self esteem
After the orgy macho bod only a dream?
No! Shovel in the junk food one last time
Then start life over, call up Trim Line
Dave Austin
Donald Trump, that disgusting buffoon,
Grimaces and gestures like a demented baboon.
Liar and con man,
A friend of the Klansman,
As well as of Putin and his KGB goons.
Disgusting spiders
What's worse? Homophobia!
Racism and hate
I'm being driven crazy because of my disgusting neighbor.
I wish that I was Luke Skywalker because I could kill him with my lightsaber.
He steals my newspapers and eggs my house.
He's a lowlife punk, a moron and also a louse.
When I order a pizza, he always intercepts it.
He opens the pizza boxes and then he spits.
Now my rotten neighbor is shouting obscenities at me and he's on my lawn.
I just shot him in the crotch with my shotgun and now his privates are gone.
Now my disgusting neighbor is more of a woman than a man.
When he saw me with my shotgun, the lowlife should've ran.
(This is a fictional poem.)
When your walking in the store. Your butt hurts even more.
Diarrhea, Diarrhea.
When your driving your Shevi, your pants gets a little heavy.
Diarrhea, Diarrhea.
When you're taking a dance, oh no! You have chocolate pants.
Diarrhea, Diarrhea.
When your watching a couple birds, you feel a couple turds.
Diarrhea,Diarrhea.
When your tying your shoe, everyone sees your number two.
Diarrhea, (Oh yeah) Diarrhea.
Diarrhea? Oh yeah!
Diarrhea? OH yeah!
Diarrrheeeaa? Oh yeah!
UH, HUH.
Diarrhea.
What's something
really gross
you've seen lately?
For me,
it was a toothless old lady
on a bus stop bench,
gumming Cheetos she first
softened up
in a paper cup of water,
her mouth and chin
bright orange.
theres only one explanation for this state of world
pandemics and nuclear winters abound
have we been forsaken or have we forsaken ourselves
if you fuel hatred it will burn you alive
cities crumble and rust as bombs fall from high above
blood stained streets herald the end of all
we cannot treat others with compassion
so compassion has abandoned us at our time of need
if you dont believe that humanity is dying
take a look in the cracked mirrors
and stab the shards in your pathetic face
we are at a loose end and the noose is tightening
as crescendos of disease fill the air
planes and tanks advance upon us
a hail of bullets is all i feel
but at least i feel something
anything
and then nothing
A disturbing article has made me sit up and take notice
Claiming some doctors diagnose cancer where none exists
For profit and gain
An unforgivable shame
If we can't trust doctors, we're all bound at the wrist
2 eggs, 1 cup flour, a quarter stick of butter, a table spoon of olive oil, back for 30 minutes
Ever been in a Public or Club Toilet
And read the Graffiti on the Wall's
So many Numbers to Ring
Providing such a rich variety of thing's
For a good time and personal pleaure
Finished shook , paused
And thought maybe just maybe after few more Shots and Jaeger Bombs
It would be a bit of a laugh to give
For a good time call Debbie 055
Me Love you long time
But then i thought hold on a second
I am in the Mens Toilet
And if i am not mistaken
Debbie does Dallas
Is probably an alias and metaphor
For # Sad Loser
Probably Confuses
Finds Childish humour funny
Has a Blow-Up Girlfriend
And Lives with his Mother
And writes stupid thing's
To impress his imaginary friends
Rhyming Senryu
Prancing, arrogance,
Such obnoxious flatulence.
You, caught,in his trance.
6-8-2021
d-rump just delivered a punish'em speech
how 'brilliantly' stupid can a person be
avoiding gun control
but equating hate crime with mental illness
so more police and executions are needed
is this guy for real
he's a friggin con man
there to put money in certain pockets
stan sand
Never drink water, fish do disgusting things in it
Like washing their fins and other stuff I can't print
But there are certain habits
Also done by rabbits
Now that's downright unprintable, I could only hint
Disgusting delinquents deliberately do
Dastardly deeds during December,
Driving daily demand down!