Best Craziest Poems
Alright kiddos, we are enthused
We're headed for the zoo
Hip, hip, hey, hey; we're greatly amused
They did say, to see the usual -- nothing new
'Cos they'd been there on every free day
too many times, my jaded crew
I'd have to think of something risque
Wave Merlin's wand or try some voodoo...
Well, as we arrived, all the cages flung open
No animals in sight; it sure was bizarre
By now my kidsters were actually hopin'
Visiting loud screams upon a star --
--That I'd let them explore
those open cages bidding us in
So, enter they did and what's more
I went in too! But my silly grin
Soon changed to a frown
The caged doors open no more
~ Trapped in a COVID lockdown!
August 06, 2020
Craziest Time at the ____ Poetry Contest
Sponsor: Caren Krutsinger
Once during those days when I was yet a teen
I chose to be purposefully mean
Sitting face to face with an important man
I behaved as badly as a confused hen
If I did open my mouth
It was only to say filth
Stony, I bid my soul to tell him
I shall not speak, even if it goes against your whim!
Enraged, he had me disgraced
Angered, he had me not embraced
Rather, on that day, I saw thunder
Coming from the eyes of this leader!
O wishful verse, thou art an ode to my memory
Here goes to my account for loving to do the crazy!
I love my wife but she's the world's craziest driver.
She became famous once when she hit Maria Shriver.
When she hit her with her car, Maria went flying through the air.
If you're ever a passenger in her car, you are sure to get scared.
My wife runs stop signs and red lights.
My hair has turned gray because of fright.
I can't stop this crazy lady from driving because I'm not her keeper.
But every time I'm in her car, I'm afraid of meeting the Grim Reaper.
She's caused a lot of damage even though that wasn't what she intended.
Twenty-five is the number of times that her license has been suspended.
Some times she drives with her eyes closed, she actually thinks she can drive by using the Force.
If somebody doesn't stop this crazy woman from driving, I'm going to have to get a divorce.
(I'm happy to say that this is a fictional poem.)
I just got home, what a shopping syndrome. In the parking lot, they were shouting put on your mask or be shot. Take a clean cart at the door, they said with a loud roar. The shopping aisle have one way signs, go the wrong way a get some fines. Go to check out and stand on the square, if you don't they will kick you into the air. Back in the car I can now relax, what a shopping climax. Is this the way it is going to be, then I want to just flee.
Date Written 7/25/2020 Choice 1: Craziest Time At WORD COUNT 96
Scene beneath is utterly true
Veracious (ridiculous) account
Told by me from baby eye view,
- Utterances she was without
Eighth day in the cold bright realm, hungry again
Feeds feature foremost!
Bundled snug in my Grandma's rhythmic arms,
grizzling kept at bay
Lovely Mummy eagerly took chance to shower
Unconcerned by her absence
Have fresh bottle of expressed breast milk
" Hungry, darling Possum?"
Grandma coos, getting comfy on the lounge
Gaze eyed, flared nostril enticed, elastic lips pursed
I'm ravenous! Now!
Lain awkwardly on Gran's lap, while she softly curses
" ..... Get this lid off, if, how ... "
Sprawled hands clasp my face - what's causing delay?
- I'll chat when I'm twice the size!
Tedious minutes of empty tummy lid wrestling pass us
Hollers supersede grunts
Jiggling knees threaten to chasm as she concentrates
Splashed suddenly, a solitary drop of nourishment
dissolves in my wailing throat
Blinked away white curtain showcases Gran's stun
Milk quickly cools on my back
Hesitant yelled confessions to shampoo lather Mama
cause more curses, taps off
Towel wrapped, she dresses red faced me in dry clothes
Grumbles over Gran's innacuracy
Guaged bottle lid's removal happens best when tipped up!
- You don't need to teats me how to drink!!
Word Count is 200
26th July 2020
Written for Contest: 'Craziest Time'
Sponsor: Caren Krutsinger
Acquiring a new pair of wings I flew into a reputative college to pursue my studies..
focussed on gaining knowledge
to become an independent girl I thrived,
Forming fresh set of friend circle sought to explore~ participating in extra- curricular activities.
Walking hurriedly on the loafers lane to reach college on time,planning group discussion's on subject topics, feeling nervous to present project's, Sneaking to canteen but not eating only chatting we did,hanging around in the campus enjoyed the exquisite infrastructure, bargaining with our stationery man while purchasing books and pens was fun,
chose staircase rather than escalator to reach our classes,
Clicking random photos on ethnic days,keeping a copy with each other to treasure our memories,
sharing dirty talks during lunch time we giggled,
admiring the beauty of our lectures we envied,
short time spent at libraries ~exchanged feelings than reading,glancing at our answer sheets we recounted our marks,learnt working together on assignments, having fun at practical classes,filling pages in record, sitting under trees and examining flowers & insects ,clinging to each others arms we walked all time,being proud volunteer in fests,Setting up stalls to earn marks,
extra credit courses that we chose was mind refreshing ,
sitting at bus stop ~were commenting crazily at our class girls who bunked and enjoyed with their boyfriend's,
crazy night fire camp dance,
playing badminton,relaxing in swimming pool,rain dancing at resort ~our last industrial trip that was,
sitting behind my best friend enjoying bike ride, fresh air hitting my face was fun.,
Working on internships on every Saturday's, travelling in train for short while to reach our destination~teaching school children,conducting exhilarating activities we enjoyed.
Successfully completing our graduation
we hopped on our career paths.
Meeting once in a while on holidays we reminisce about our crazy times that happened five years ago.!
Aug 7, 2020
Note:Craziest time at ..Poetry Contest.
Picked Choice one: Craziest time At...
Word count: 299
Sponsored by Caren Crutsinger.
I was over at a friend's house
to watch the superbowl
with three other friends 2 years ago
Mid-game, he started telling us
about the weirdest dream he ever had
where he jogging on the sidewalk,
one evening, homebound,
when a passing car
honked and pulled up to him.
The driver of the car
asked him for the nearest gas station.
After kindly giving the man directions,
it turns out the driver wanted
something else from my friend;
the watch he was wearing.
The man stuck a gun out of the driver window
and yelled "Give up your watch!"
After the watch was thrown into the car,
the driver sped off.
That's the thanks he gets?
Very funny when the story takes place
in a dream. He had us laughing
uncontrollably
Not funny at all; not remotely
a laughing matter
had it not been a dream!
Craziest Time At The Poetry Contest
Sponsored by: Caren Krutsinger
Date written: 08/04/2020
I stare at you through unfamiliar eyes due to my pride
I won't let my heart interfere with my minds
decision
because wanting you isn't a win win situation
it's more like standing on the train station platform
waiting
I fear that I may have been forsaken
for months I have been raking these god damn roots
trying to uncover what should already be lying there
Proof
I had tricks up my sleeves like the tricks rabbit
but to get your attention would take dedication like
people do when they pray at a sabbath and I am unwilling
I'd rather
not think about how you make me feel
even though the thoughts are so unreal
It would take me down the wrong rode before it turned
right
So despite all this heightened hype that my heart
is constantly throwing like fresh snow balls
to my membrane I choose the sane lane
I'm not playing the blame game or trying
to throw dirt on your name because it all
remains the same
I want you
and that's when I realized that not a thing has changed
you will forever be my heart and minds craziest battle
Craziest Time at the Time of Spilled Soup
I spilled a bowl of vegetable soup –
Slipped on the shiny waxed floor;
The scene I saw made my muse utter expletives –
Fainting in horror at the kitchen door.
Choruses of carrots crushed on the curtains
Prose of Potatoes pelted the windowpanes
Lyrics of limas littered the linoleum
Odes of onions overturned on the oven
Turnips of Thesaurus tumbling free
Sonnets of seasoning scorched on the stove top
Epics of eggplant - emjambment escaping
Ballads of beets beat feet to the back porch
Meters of mushrooms marching on marble
Verses of “vege’s” with visible vertigo
Prosody of pumpkin all over the place
Rhymes of rutabagas running-a-muck
Blues of black beans bashed in the butler’s pantry
Couplets of croutons covered the ceiling
Free verse of fiddleheads floats by the “frig”
Sestinas of spinach stuck to the sink.
Oh, what a sight of poetic distress –
Letters and phrases all over the space
Carefully sorted all the rhythms and rhymes
Put everything back in its proper place.
Craziest time at the time of spilled soup!
8/5/20
166 words
Choice #1
I’m having the craziest time in the Soup
I never knew how perilous that it could be.
But since I landed here loopity-loop,
I’ve felt like the chicken of some really weird sea.
It sure looked delicious the first time that I flew
over the attractive bowl, so that’s why I swooped down.
But then I got too low; my small body, it fell through
the surface of the creamy soup! Oh I fear I’ll drown!
My wings, how they’ve struggled, but it’s just too thick.
Cream of chicken, so tasty, is going to be my demise.
I’m sinking and I’m sinking and now I feel so sick.
Farewell! Beware of Soup, my dear fellow flies!
Aug. 7, 2020 for Caren Krutsinger's Craziest Time At The Poetry Contest
Choise 2: Craziest Time in the Soup
116 Words according to https://wordcounter.net/
It was mid-April yet felt like December
we tramped a rocky trail in the Himalayas,
our footsteps echoed in the enchanting valley
under the blanket of warm twinkling stars.
Snow-clad peaks seemed closer than ever
as we walked hand in hand, a few strangers,
we'd found each other in our intriguing conquest
mesmerized by dizzy aroma of mountain villages.
We reached atop lost in crispy midnight
beneath was a stream of shimmering crystals,
afar, a night walker hummed ancient lullaby
wrapping our frozen hands in a Cashmere touch.
Our shivering hearts melting to soothing Aurora
narrated journeys around fire lit by familiarity.
A few hours gave us moments to remember for lifetime
as we hula hooped our fears in freezing breeze.
The kindness of strangers and the love we shared
still warms my Winter nights in starry crystals,
An unexpected journey lingers in my memory
showering shooting stars of tender whispers.
August 12, 2020
Craziest Time At The Poetry Contest
Sponsor: Caren Krutsinger
Word Count: 151
Craziest Time in Amphan
Forecast of cyclone Amphan alarmed us.
Doors-windows all closed oblivious.
Yet could not apprehend severity
ending in calamity.
Appeared roaring Amphan in devastating form.
Vigorous rigorous violent storm.
With tremendous thrust tempest outburst.
Cyclone blown touching two hundred kilometres speed per hour.
Simultaneous terrible heavy showers
Crowd of clouds too dense compact without any gap
Not allowing frictions perhaps
under high wind pressure to surrender
but to pour rains in opulence
threatening ambience.
No lightning flash or thunder
Outrageous uproar of cyclone in high pitch
on intermittent sonorous twitch.
Tall trees, huge massive ones encircling my premise
swinging, swaying, spinning, thrashing on one another.
Thick wooden framed glass doors of my house trembling.
Push of strong storm forced rain waters to flood my floor.
Ankle deep water collected surrounding sofa set.
Electricity was off.
We had candlelight dinner on compulsion,
not romantic but traumatic.
At midnight, all quiet on domestic front.
Yet we did not dare to open windows at night
At dawn, no storm, no rain, calm tranquil after disaster.
Most big trees are damaged, either have fallen or lost boughs, branches.
Tallest tree at gate lying slant hitting my balcony at corner, being uprooted.
One can walk on the big trunk to reach balcony at first floor.
Traffic signal Poles and lamp posts all broken.
TV not functioning, Mobile not working,
Telephone wire torn Internet gone.
Social distancing attained highest score.
Complete confinement settled us indoor.
08/16/20
Word Count 238
Third Place
' Craziest Time ' Contest by Caren krutsinger
' After The Hurricane' Contest by craig cornish
We had the craziest time in Istanbul
We were stuck for three months during
the ongoing Pandemic
The bustling city lost it’s rhythm and rhyme
Like a heart that misses a beat one day at that time
The streets grew empty the Café’s were shut
The people were few and the weekends were curfew
There was no Funicular to greet me.
Hotels were shutting one after another
We changed eight different ones till it was time to go
We were lucky and chose to stay in front of the
Bosphorus Sea once more
This was a blessing and a clincher for me.
My companions now were the gulls
And the different ships and hulls
And the best of all was the wide open sea.
We would walk the promenade
And keep ourselves fit so that the virus doesn’t
give us a hit.
The sea was our guide and friend
When we felt lost then
To our utter delight one day we saw
Dolphins swimming in the sea
From that moment I knew nature was
the truest companion who stood by me
We braved it all and came home safe to
Our beautiful family.
Dated: 20.08.2020
Choice 2: Craziest time in..
A true story:
Boarded our boat, four of us — one was Gilligan. Map in hand, did we understand? Enough to sail to the jewelry store! Ahh...a ceramic necklace and matching earrings ~ black and white heaven of St. Maarten. Sleepy eateries closed.
quarter of orleans
weather’s grand, fair seas ahead
confident tourists
We spy a beach on the Caribbean sea side of the inlet. We’ve been warned, but Gilligan decides to bilk the wild tides as Maryann reins him in. Gilligan as a teen or in midlife does crazy things.
waves lolita tongue
the fool’s gold of confidence
— wisdom of his wife
The captain strolls the beach looking for a spelunking opportunity — ahem...alas, he runs back when he spies a couple having cake by the ocean and a predator on the cliff ogling.
intercourse of beach
tourist must not get involved —
someone else’s cake
Back in the boat, motor crooning, destination the pier. We are within range.
motor’s sputtering
all eyes are on land and sea
exacting the sport
The first mate, rope in hand, jumps, misses the pier, heads south into the deep. Laugh cut short…mother will kill me if anything happens to him. He bounds backwards onto the boat, dripping, a waterlogged cell.
four of us in deep
only one fell overboard
gilligan’s all wet
His Christmas gift, that year reads: if you can read this, pull me back in the boat.
8/5/2020
Craziest Time At The Poetry Contest
Sponsor is Caren Krutsinger
233 words per howmanysyllables.com (counts words and syllables)
Craziest Time under the sun
A heart melting for lost love
Dreams losing their passion
Promises broken to pieces
Inspiration without enthusiasm
~
Craziest time under the sun
Vivid hues of discouragement
Breaking into the mind who sees
Visions of painful memories
Loss of hope and freedom to believe
~
Craziest time under the sun
Horrid feelings of dread and gloom
Leading even the moon to disillusionment
Reaching the seas with feared reveries
Doubt consuming the mind’s assurances
~
Craziest time under the sun
Melancholy colored with black fright
Feelings of despair creating darkness
Even among the flowers and song
Where music and dance grew so strong
~
Craziest time under the sun
Ached to be filled with renewed warmth
Fed only the spirit of despondency
And created painful feelings of misery
Where in the world is the love?
~
Craziest time under the sun
Reached through the murky clouds
Gray thoughts filing their hearts
With judgements and bitter loss
Only God knows what is going on
~
Craziest time under the sun
Comes with a mask that is worn
To venture to the store or work
Where others might carry a germ
From a virus that has changed the whole world!
~
God help us to live on through this time
The Craziest time under the sun!
Craziest Time At The Poetry Contest
Choice 3: Craziest Time Under ...
Sponsored by: Caren Krutsinger
August 11, 2020